yoyossarian
yoyossarian's Journal
Boehner Proposes A Tax on Obama
Boehner Proposes a Tax on Obama
"I said attacks, not a tax! ATTACKS!" said a more-than-usually red-faced and unhappy House Speaker John Boehner on the stairs of the Capitol Building yesterday, to anyone who would listen. "Jesus, clean the crap out of your ears, will ya, America?" he shrieked in apparent conclusion before running down the avenue in a very Jerry-Lewis-like fashion, weeping like a little girl.
Ol' Blubberbutt, as he has been known by his colleagues on both sides of the aisle in Washington for many years now, has been showing signs of his signature hysteria for weeks now, ever since he saw a replay of himself on tv from a few years back, saying he'd gotten 98% of what he'd wanted from President Obama in that last round of negotiations, conducted over the threat of another government shutdown. "That missing 2% is really starting to get to him," said one aide on condition that we attributed the source to someone else, preferably a Democratic aide. "Y'know, he doesn't really have a lot of friends... it's weird, but I think it's sort of like a reverse Stockholm Syndrome; he misses his hostages," he concluded, referring of course to the American people.
Scientists have issued an anonymous warning to the general public that Mr. Boehner's tears should not be touched or even approached, as they are extremely caustic to human flesh. "These tears are not like human tears, or even crocodile tears; they're thick and glutinous and black as the pits of hell. We've even heard reports of these 'tears' turning into little black spiders--well, they're like spiders, only with 'way too many legs." said a trembling scientist on condition of total anonymity, or at least a guarantee of a quick and painless death, for himself and his family, if he was ever somehow revealed. "And let me tell you, if you get one of those things on you... well, just don't. Don't even look at them. Really."
The Hole Within Our World
Writing has always helped me to maintain my sanity in a world going mad.
I wrote this back during the horrible, hideous, truly terrible deep-water Gulf oil spill:
What a Show!
The Age is split in two
And no one knows just what to do
Or where to go
Nobody knows just how to feel
Or how to deal
Or what to say and do to heal
The hole within our world
The shard within our hearts
It’s gone beyond our wildest fears
It may just be beyond our arts
To heal this wound, so deep, so grave
It may just be too late to save
Us from the fires
Of our desires...
But what a show!
For all the universe to witness
When we go!
We’ll light up like a Christmas tree
And everyone who sees will know that
We Were Here
That we were full of fire and heat and beer
That we were fueled, quite foolishly
By beer and fear and fire
And we took the whole thing pretty high
And then we took it even higher...
Like Icarus,
If we had one fatal flaw
Then this was it:
We were blinded by the lovely light we lived in
And we never really knew just when to quit
from Van Gogh's Ear by D X Stone
Kindle version available for FREE thru this weekend
Breaking: Jody Arias Fires Attorney!
(AP) In a surprise move today, Jody Arias fired her attorney; his body was found burned beyond recognition in the ladies bathroom just off the courtroom where her trial has been going on for the last several months... except for his face, which Arias claims she did NOT remove with a pen knife, then tie it onto the back of her head and try to walk out of custody backwards. "She has NO IDEA how the face got attached to her head," says her new attorney, Jenny Bendon, who Arias chose "for her virgin blood," whatever that means. "She doesn't remember anything after her old attorney publicly said that he didn't like her--but that doesn't prove anything, except that she didn't do it," says Ms Bendon, who is indeed a member of the political activist group Purity First, which encourages young people of America to "find new and innovative approaches to suicide so that they may go to their graves just as they came into the world: blind, ignorant and virginal."
Some speculate that Arias herself attempted suicide in the first few weeks of her trial, but lost consciousness after beating her own head in with a purloined judge's gavel... but this theory was disproved when a suicide note was found in her own hand, written in her own hand, which read simply "I didn't do this suicide. It was someone else."
Saving Steven Spielberg!
How about a movie entitled Saving Steven Spielberg? The Nazis are criticizing him SOO heavily, cuz they're JEALOUS... and it's SOOO unfair, so a special team of brave DUers are sent out to find him on his latest shoot in Borneo or wherever, and bring him back to safety... haha!
So lovely... so beautiful... so sad... thanx SO MUCH for sharing!
And btw, he was gay, you know... 2X Pulitzer Prize winner for music, he eventually suffered from depression and alcoholism after his later works met with adverse criticism... he died of cancer at age 71.
*Many do not know that Barber himself arranged his Adagio for Strings for vocal choir (1967) under the title “Agnus Dei” (text from the Latin Mass: Lamb of God, who taketh away the sins of the world, have mercy upon us; grant us peace). This composition, in both instrumental and vocal forms, is often performed during state funerals (Franklin Roosevelt, Princess Grace of Monaco, Albert Einstein, etc.). Many first heard it when used in the soundtrack for the film “Platoon.”
He shared a house with his lover Menotti for over 40 years. Of course, they couldn't get married, just like today. But they named their house Capricorn, which I think is kinda neat.
I wonder if the depression and the alcoholism had anything to do with society's mad intolerance for human diversity?
This is the sort of person the Catholic Church has no tolerance for. The man who wrote the holiest music I've ever heard.
You are a truly sophisticated reader! Two solutions:
One: Just download a kindle reader to your computer! It's also FREE at http://www.kindle.com
and then you can either buy the book that way, or download it for free by becoming a Kindle Prime member.
Two: A paperbound print copy of BOTH books is also available at amazon.com; they cost more, but they came out pretty sweet if you ask me!
Van Gogh's Ear:
http://www.amazon.com/Van-Goghs-Ear-D-Stone/dp/0615793630/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1366013523&sr=1-1
The Dark Side of Des Moines:
http://www.amazon.com/Dark-Side-Moines-D-Stone/dp/0615793649/ref=sr_1_4?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1366013523&sr=1-4
Poor THING!
And I DO mean THING!
How 'bout some BUG POWDER, baby?
The Zone takes care of its own.
Well, he wasn't wrapped all that tight to begin with!
This Meat is obviously SPOILED!
INDEED!
It's the most expensive independent film ever made.
It was backed by German money, since there are NO EWOKS in it at all, OR Johnny Depp.
And it is a WILD ride.
True, some of the dialogue is both rather subdued, and also difficult to understand because of extreme dialects. Doesn't matter in the slightest. You could follow the story (s) with the sound turned off. But that is a put-off for a lot of people, as is the jumping back and forth between various times and narratives. But it's artfully done.
I'm not surprised by the lack of support and many attacks I've read on the net, tho. Catch-22 and Welles' The Trial are excellent examples of why such critique is actually a sort of hidden promise. But you the view must decide for yourself, as is only proper... and the only way to do THAT is to see it, instead of being put off by a bunch of wanna-be filmmakers-turned hissy-spitters. Criticism is easy; making a film of this quality is pretty much impossible. That's why it took three of the most talented people in the industry to get 'er done!
I don't think you'll be disappointed, tho, as to how your hard-earned money got spent. At the very least, it's--what's the French term for this?--oh yeah: Pretty damn neat!
And a GREAT way to kill a few hours in these next 2 nerve-jangling days.
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Member since: Sat Oct 6, 2007, 06:32 AMNumber of posts: 1,054
