I was sexually harassed for the first time today. Thoughts that have been running through my head.

[KitSileya]

35. Heck no! I am so anti-gun it's not even funny.

Women who live in homes with guns in them are more likely to get shot than anyone else with those very same guns. These days I live in a sane country when it comes to guns, and I have trouble when I go back to the US because of the prevalence and visibility of weapons all the time.

No, men need to realize that women live different lives than them, because of them. Because our society doesn't keep men accountable for their behavior, women need to live their lives more carefully than men. They have to judge the trustworthiness of men, because every man is Schrødinger's rapist. It's not about being scared all the time, which is what those who poo-poo the whole notion thinks, it is about being wary all the time. It's about judging whether that guy at the bus stop is likely to hit on you, and how to deflect him. It's about being aware where the men are seated in the metro carriage and keeping aware of what they are doing. It's about being aware of how to answer the colleague who asks you out so that he won't get threatening, or backtalk you when you let hi down. It's being aware of your surroundings, it's putting checkpoints when you go on a first date (telling a friend his name, where you will be, how long you will be gone, and setting up text message check-ins along the way in case something happens,) it's knowing that if something happens to you, you know that most likely you will get the blame, so you mitigate beforehand by evaluating how you dress, what you say, what you do.

It's like that Margaret Atwood quote - with the opposite gender, most men fear being laughed at, women fear being killed. Our perception of reality is completely different because we need to worry about so very different things. However, many men refuse to acknowledge that because they see it as an attack on them personally. They would never harass a woman, so the notion that a woman would assess them to avoid harassment is seen as a slur on their honor, and they refuse to see beyond that.