This message was self-deleted by its author

[zeeland]

32. I have come to feel like an enabler with

A family member addicted to drugs or alcohol. Trapped between my
loyalty and lifelong dedication to the party vs. an increasing realization
how toxic and damaging continued support is for myself personally and
for my country. When I consider the alternative, repukes, it acts as
reinforcement to stay because things will be worse albeit in a different way.
Having voted third party in two Senate races in the last few years was
a mere protest vote since in both cases the Democrat was a guaranteed
winner.

When Obama ran in 2008 for the first time in my life I believed again in
all the naive bs I was raised on. Obama was going to be the FDR of my
lifetime. He was going to be the president my mother spoke of in her
lifetime as she would a beloved Uncle or even a father. A man who's
death still made her cry.

Admittedly, I set him up for failure by expecting too much and believing
every word that came so eloquently from his mouth. After eight years of
Bush/Cheney we all were desperate for our Democratic leaders to be the
very best they could be. it was so easy to forgive voting for the war and
all the other betrayals because that was all going to change after all we
had endured the last eight years. We had all looked into the abyss and
we never wanted to be on that edge again.

In all fairness Obama is a good man and a good president. He is not
exceptional. He is not progressive and he is controlled by corporate
and financial interests that have taken over the party and the country.
He is not powerful enough to buck the status quo for the millions that
believed he could be. This is as good as it's going to get and given that it
all pretty much sucks where do we go from here?

This was cathartic to write and I should delete, but what the hell