September 13, 2014

No, I'm not 'back,' I'm reading, but most definitely still not able to fully participate here.

However, I'd like to ask for a selfish indulgence from those here who are still interested, still anguished (perhaps) over the continuing crisis of justice and humanity in Ferguson, MO..

As some here may well know, the tragic events there, and the unimaginable, but very real and unsettling response by the officers and officials there to the efforts by that community to exercise their free speech rights to protest and be heard have shaken me to the core and I'm still unable to discuss them, write about them, or even listen to or read about them without weeping uncontrollably.

Those who know me personally understand that it's not only out of character for me to be so traumatized to weep (much less, uncontrolled - I really don't fully understand my reaction, myself), and that it's likely a reflection of a mental illness brought on by the stress of previous experiences, triggered by events in Ferguson which I've engrossed myself in, by choice; by necessity. It's also a reflection and effect of my unsettled view of my personal heritage; my citizenship; and perhaps, my own self-worth; to view the tragic events in Ferguson which residents there are experiencing as integral to all of those in my own relatively secure life.

*I had noticed seriously abnormal reactions from myself to the back and forth between members here in which I had become undeservedly abusive towards posters, and, although it's a cinch to post, I'm not mentally balanced enough for the discussions which are integral to actual participation here. It's really not fair to others more dedicated to discussions for *me to hit and run, but I'm not mentally able to engage fully, so... this post is somewhat of a more detailed explanation for my exit as much as it is cathartic for me. I see that some question this approach, but I'm convinced it won't disrupt them too much or affect them too much - me, on the other hand, I still have some very real mental health issues that I'm receiving care for and working on. I hope DUers can bear this indulgence without too much disdain or resentment.

Anyway, I want to just share this video of what is correctly labeled as, 'A skin-tingling speech which speaks to the heart of #Ferguson -- Senator Maria Chappelle-Nadal on Missouri Senate floor Sept. 10, 2014. Chapelle-Nadal delivers a gripping speech calling Gov. Nixon to the carpet for allowing Senators and constituents to be stripped of their 1st Amendment rights while being tear gassed and treated like animals. She details how MO Governor Nixon allowed the state of emergency to escalate while he did nothing. Senator Chapelle-Nadal brings it all into perspective, detailing personal experiences as well as the racist history of #Ferguson which culminated into the aftermath of the Michael Brown shooting when the MO Governor treated Ferguson like foreign enemy territory.'

I'm going to post it here without much comment (and no response) because I believe it will be helpful for some to understand just what this community in Ferguson has been experiencing, and what they're facing right now, and in the future.

Senator Maria Chappelle-Nadal has placed herself on the front lines of this important struggle for justice and the rights of her constituency and has served, in her words, as a 'mother, a teacher, and a sister' as she has spent countless hours among the people 'as Jesus would have done' to help citizens cope with the challenges they've faced. Tear-gassed for three days in a row, along with other protesters, while her governor 'sat in his home,' Sen. Chappelle-Nadal has been a tireless advocate and deserves a complete listen to her emotional and powerful address.

Thanks, in advance, for your attention and dedication to this crisis in Ferguson, and I wish everyone the very best of luck in your endeavors and extend the very best regards from me for your friendship and commitment.

-Ron

*I regularly retweet on Ferguson and St. Louis from an extensive network of folks who follow these issues and developments from direct connections to the state and local government and community.

You can follow me here: ron fullwood ?@ronfullwood (be certain to follow the folks I retweet... that's where you'll get connected to up to date events and developments)

Thanks again, y'all. We protest, we share... joy. Love for the people.

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