Russian Media Freak Over Joe Biden's Election Resurrection

[highplainsdem]

https://www.thedailybeast.com/russian-state-media-freak-over-joe-bidens-election-resurrection

Joe Biden’s win in South Carolina gave those Russian media pause, but his buoyant resurgence on Super Tuesday left the Kremlin’s mouthpieces nearly speechless.

Reporting on the U.S. elections for Russian state TV channel Rossiya 24, Alyona Pivkina made a gesture of surprise and said: “Suddenly, Biden surged ahead.” The revelation was followed by an awkward moment of silence between Pivkina and the seemingly stunned host of the news broadcast.

The pro-Kremlin newspaper Vzglyad complained that Biden “rose from the ashes like a phoenix,” prevailing “in spite of the corruption scandals” that have long been alleged and cultivated by the Russians—and the Republicans—concerning his son, Hunter, and his own activities in Ukraine.

With notable irritation, Vzglyad griped about Joe Biden’s state primary victories in North Carolina, Oklahoma, Tennessee, and Alabama, claiming that the pro-Biden votes in rural states were secured by “rednecks, who shoot skunks for fun, bowl, beat their wives and associate the word ‘socialist’ with the communist threat.” The newspaper bitterly surmised that through Biden’s anticipated nomination, the U.S. elites won yet another Cold War against socialism.

-snip-

And here I'd thought the explanations from Sanders for Biden winning were creative.

But now we have a pro-Kremlin Russian paper explaining that Biden voters are wife-beating bowling rednecks who shoot skunks for fun.

Wow, you'd NEVER know which candidate Russia wants to see win our Democratic nomination...

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

1. I am not a wife-beating bowling redneck who shoots skunks for fun.

I don't have a wife.

[Beakybird]

2. I beat my wife at bowling.

[2naSalit]

3. Same here.

[Squinch]

4. Yeah, but the skunks part is totally true. Right?

I'm not the only one, right?

[Chainfire]

12. If Alabamians killed Skunks

The would not be a Red State.

[Squinch]

18. .

[Wounded Bear]

21. I think they're talking about the 4 legged kind...

[Pantagruel]

7. No wife, no problem

I understand you can get a Russian wife through the mail. She probably comes in one of those omni-present Amazon boxes.
Russia is one stop shopping for wives and Orange Foolious talking points.

[Chainfire]

14. That is actually true

I befriended a Russian mail order bride when I worked at FSU. She had been her for about a dozen years. She was a very nice, and very attractive lady and, in the terminology of the local rednecks, she was a "dirt road sport."She was very feisty. I really enjoyed shooting the breeze with her. She married a much older professor, and seemed to have a working agreement with her husband for a private social life apart from him. Perhaps he just needed someone in the house or an escort for social functions.

[TexasTowelie]

8. Going down the checklist about myself:

Wife-beating -- no, I never got married
Bowling -- no, I've only gone bowling once and was horrible so I never tried again
Redneck -- no, I moved away from my redneck hometown when I was 18 and went to college
Shooter -- no, the last time I shot a rifle was when I was 17, I might be able to hit the broad side of a barn
Skunks -- no, I'm trying to remember if I saw one in the last decade, but I nearly got sprayed by one when I was a kid

It appears that I failed every qualification set by the Russian commentator.

[getagrip_already]

5. I'm probably showing my age and background but.....

But I've pretty much lived by the philosophy that if the kremlin supported something, I opposed it.

Our interests rarely align. They certainly don't when it comes to politics.

[Renew Deal]

6. Is there any other reason to shoot skunks?

[Qutzupalotl]

13. In Soviet Russia, skunk shoot you!

[highplainsdem]

15. LOL!

[lastlib]

9. If I shot skunks for fun, I would be missing toes on my right foot......

Once, out in our woods looking for a cow about to give birth after a heavy snow, I was approached by a mother skunk and three babies. Remembering the rule that skunks always have the right-of-way, I stopped, stood still, and watched *very quietly* as the little family walked across the toe of my boot. Without so much as a "by your leave", "excuse me", or "haha, I can do this because I'm a skunk," they were as nonchalant as they could have been.

So, no, Vlad, I don't shoot skunks for fun, bowl, or beat my wife. Nor do I associate the word 'socialist' with the communist threat. I DO, however, VOTE DEMOCRATIC! and I WILL vote for Joe Biden and AGAINST your puppet tRumpski.

[highplainsdem]

11. Great story!

[Rollo]

16. I have no cow in this hunt...

... but I do get skunks on my in-town property several times a year. Usually I know they've been around by the aroma. It's rare that I see one. Once I caught one in a humane live trap that I set out for a different depredating critter. That was interesting. I managed to free it without getting doused.

Eventually I found a gap under a fence the skunks were using as an entry point and blocked it off with some rocks. That reduced the problem, but didn't eliminate it entirely. The next night a skunk was running around on the other side of the fence letting off stink bombs. So I went back inside and had a big bowl of coleslaw. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em.

[TwilightZone]

10. Those claims will be showing up on DU any minute now.

Skunks and all.

[Qutzupalotl]

17. For a country that was once believed to know us better than we know ourselves,

they sure sound like they have no clue.

Oh, and for further evidence of who they want:

Link to tweet

[OnDoutside]

19. It may well panic them into trebling down on their Trump support, as the thought of all their hits

on Biden and the Democratic Party coming back to bite them on the ass, must suddenly terrify them.

[Cha]

20. That's Too BAD!!! Wah!