History of Feminism
Related: About this forum'Spanking for Jesus' Is Exactly as Fucked Up as It Sounds
There are no words....
The Christian Domestic Discipline Yahoo! group, which is private, opens with a quote from Hebrews 12:11: "No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it." And, whom are we to train into righteousness and peace? Women only (duh)! The group's description goes on to say, "We offer a LOVING approach to all who wish to learn and grow in a traditional Male, head of household, female submissive, Christian Domestic Discipline relationship." One last caveat:
This is not a typical "spank" site. We are NOT a dating service, a list for personal ads, bratting, erotic stories, or alternate lifestyles. We do not discuss Sadomasochism, the disciplining of children, same gender relationships, or Fem domination/male submission.
According to CDD practitioners, Domestic Discipline is neither erotic nor abusive. It's merely a "practice between two consenting life partners in which the head of the household (HoH) takes necessary measures to achieve a healthy relationship dynamic... to create a healthy home environment... [and] to protect all members of the family from dangerous or detrimental outcomes by punishing the contributing, and thus unwanted, behaviors for the greater good of the entire family."
http://jezebel.com/spanking-for-jesus-is-exactly-as-fucked-up-as-it-soun-514271243
Voice for Peace
(13,141 posts)"Hey sweetheart. I just wanted to talk to you about something Ive been learning about
called domestic discipline. Domestic discipline is ______, but it's not ________ (put it
into your own words). I know it might sound strange to you, and I certainly understand
that. But, I think it could really help our relationship, especially with ______________
(whatever issues you would like it to help with, or why you want it in your relationship).
I've researched this and/or talked to others about it and I think it has a lot of pros to it
like ___, ____, ____ (list whatever pros you want). It's something I feel we should try for
a while, and if it doesn't work, then it doesn't work. We can agree to end it and move
forward if thats the case. But I'd like to try it because ________. I love you a lot, and I
want our relationship to be the strongest it can possibly be. What do you think/what
questions do you have about it?
It's important to do three key things when talking to your partner about domestic discipline.
1: Empathize with their feelings. Domestic discipline, especially to someone who has never
heard of it before, will likely come off as a completely strange and crazy concept to them,
intaglio
(8,170 posts)spanking the monkey whilst they read the site.
Tanelorn
(359 posts)Just posted this to several Australian Facebook sites as a warning. I am willing to suffer the negative comment if this turns out to be satire
LuvNewcastle
(16,856 posts)they smack their kids. Might as well smack the little woman around, too. Is that what Jesus was talking about when he said to turn the other cheek?
Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)I still think it's nothing more than a way for certain couples to get their freak on in a jesus-approved way.
TreasonousBastard
(43,049 posts)nikto
(3,284 posts)Jesus would have used The Belt.
Would have turned the other cheek
Sorry. Couldn't resist.
Edit: Alas, pun already used up thread. Back to bed for me.
"Turning the other cheek" goes completely and totally against all American Conservative values.
I thought CONservatives owned Jesus.
It is all so confusing.
ismnotwasm
(42,014 posts)They stole him.
nikto
(3,284 posts)Keeping Jesus chained up in the basement.
ismnotwasm
(42,014 posts)And shoes inappropriate for walking
tclambert
(11,087 posts)Some say that's where the phrase "rule of thumb" came from.
Kablooie
(18,641 posts)Just practicing my religion officer.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)I don't see how anyone can really criticise these people but defend those who do it for sexual kicks.
Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)Spanking as part of a healthy sex life is really no big deal when both people consent - but don't try to tell me you're doing it for Jesus.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)And as such I wish they'd all be more honest about it.
Is it really "healthy" to go even further than normalizing this hierarchical stuff, and actually fetishize and romanticize it?
I don't find that issue so cut and dry.
Lots of kneejerking about this issue, so I'll just spell it out before anyone starts. No, I don't think it should be condemned, or illegal, or stigmatized. But I also don't think it should be considered healthy just because. Nor should it be protected from criticism or questioning.
People love to pretend like sexual stuff is in a special category and has this protected status but IMO that's just ridiculous. We question and criticize people's private actions all the time... although most like to try to dress it up like some choices can be made into a public issue, and therefore sexual stuff is different. I think that's a bunch of pretzel logic and a cop out.
Sheldon Cooper
(3,724 posts)I think that people who engage in alternative sexual practices have always had a huge stigma placed on them.
Until recently, they've been made to go pretty far underground (sometimes literally) to indulge in their activities. I think that folks who practice the lifestyle are pretty normal and well-adjusted people, by and large. Of course there are some who are acting out or working through previous trauma, that much is clear. But I don't have a problem with society in general becoming more accepting of alternative sexual behavior, even traditional male/dom and female/sub.
I personally think that pretty much anything goes when it comes to consenting adults, and even though I can be quite horrified by some of it (such as behaviors involving excrement) I don't judge what others do in their bedrooms.
redqueen
(115,103 posts)As in - A2M and A2P are unhealthy. And degrading.
Sure the participant may consent, and even (somehow) enjoy it.
That doesn't mean it isn't an inherent health risk.
As for the kink scene being so put upon and unfairly treated, that is simply not the case anymore, and it hasn't been for a while now.
ismnotwasm
(42,014 posts)For many it's like therapy, not just sex. Working out demons I guess. And it's also a counter- culture, so there's usually internal support.
To me, The problem lies in certain people self diagnosing what they need, such as incest or rape survivors. A safe place to act out sexually might help some, but it damages others. I was talking to a friend who left that scene quite a while back. She now works with homeless women and has very little interest in sex. It seemed to do her some good, I suppose-but I didn't see evidence of real healing, judging by our conversations. (She'd been a very young prostitute turned out by her mother--also a prostitute)
What I really don't like is the violent, painful-looking porn that comes with the rise of acceptance, there's very little education at those sites, (although some are much better than others at the "don't try this at home unless you know what you're doing" message) just violent imagery that's worked it's way to public conscience as acceptable violent sex.
And hell yeah, things like the equivalent of a mild to moderate taser to your genitals probably carries a risk, as do some of the more extreme orifice-- stretching. Etc