Sanders announces that water is wet.

[Warren Stupidity]

Clinton supporters immediately denounce wet waterists, insist all true democrats are dry waterists, note that Sanders is technically not a democrat thus proving that water is dry.

Two days later Clinton notes as an aside that water is actually wet.

Clinton supporters immediately announce that Sanders had 40 years to come to his wet waterism and that according to somebody on the internet he told somebody somewhere once that water might be not entirely wet because of ice.

[Motown_Johnny]

1. Two days later? More like 10 for her to come up with something like that.

[NuclearDem]

2. Sanders supporters denounce ice and steam as corporate conspiracies.

[iandhr]

23. LMAO

[stevenleser]

24. And they still haven't figured out a way to promote Bernie without attacking Hillary...

... ensuring that for every convert they get, four Democrats are permanently turned off to Bernie.

[Ned_Devine]

28. Wet blanket award

[stevenleser]

32. Reality can be like that. nt

[Ned_Devine]

34. It can be when you go out of your way to be a wet blanket

[stevenleser]

37. Nope, reality doesn't go out of its way, it just is. nt

[ornotna]

42. Channeling Jack Handey?

That's deep.

[Ned_Devine]

68. Seriously. I mean, where do I go with this?

I might as well just let this person think that he/she is right and just move on. See? I'm NOT a wet blanket

[LiberalLovinLug]

88. There is this other thing called "satire"

look it up.

It is based on reality (ie. Hillary suddenly adopting more progressive positions that Bernie has had all along).

But then the more nuanced aspects of comedy are a little difficult to grasp for the simple authoritarian minds among us.

[truebrit71]

77. *cough* 2008 you agrees with Bernie fans *cough*...

Better fire up that DeLorean pal, because no-one is buying the shit you're pedaling in 2015....

[BeanMusical]

95. +1

[AgingAmerican]

78. Have you figured out how to promote Hillary without attacking Sanders?

[MADem]

79. And look at all the pushback you're getting for DARING to say that!!

Never mind that your statement was entirely true!

If you aren't "feeling the Bern" then you're gonna get a talking to, doncha know!!! There can be only ONE POV here! Anyone who talks back and gets smart will be taken to the woodshed--in humorless fashion, too!



Poor, poor Bernie--his "supporters" are his worst enemies. Even though he can be a bit scolding and pointing at times, he comes off like a Happy Warrior compared to his excoriating fans. The whole "trash Clinton to elevate Sanders" theme is growing stale, though. They're gonna have to come up with a new schtick.

[beerandjesus]

82. SUCH bullshit. I don't even know how you can say such a thing.

I've been waiting, and waiting, and waiting to hear ONE fucking reason to vote for Hillary. All I get is "she's a FIGHTER! it's HER TURN! what are you, SEXIST?" And any time--I mean, ANY fucking time a Bernie supporter tries to nail a Hillary supporter on a specific issue, said Hillary supporter magically disappears, presumably to hillaryclintonsupporters.com to plan the next slander on Bernie.

So here's your chance: Give me ONE fucking reason to support Hillary over Bernie. ONE. And remember, I said Hillary over BERNIE, not Hillary over Republican X, so you can't say SCOTUS, abortion rights, or anything else like that that we liberals generally consider to be the absolute bare minimum.

I'm seriously hoping for something good here.

[retrowire]

89. and yet... an hour has passed

and no one has vetted for Hillary to you.

here my friend... berniesanders.com / feelthebern.org are both great resources to learn all about where Bernie stands on the issues that affect Americans today.

if you have ANY questions about Bernie, just ask.

*sprouts wings and flutters away*

[beerandjesus]

90. It really is surreal, isn't it?

Just ONE reason. I'm getting kinda obsessed. I really want to know if there's even ONE.

Other than "it's HER TURN!" of course.

[beerandjesus]

102. Still waiting..........

[retrowire]

103. a tumbleweed blows by...

an armadillo farts....

[jeff47]

3. I'm waiting for the attack that Sanders is a fraud on climate change

because he exhales CO2.

[HereSince1628]

25. Surrogates say not many climate scientists at Bernie rallies

Argument ensues that of course doesn't take into account the paucity of climatologists in the population.

Surrogates counter, nonetheless, if the climatologists -REALLY- supported Sanders they'd show up and fill an arena section

[Snotcicles]

53. There would be a sea of pocket protectors, doing the wave. nt

[dreamnightwind]

99. Or, there are climatologists at the Sanders rallies but

none of them are people of color. Not good enough Bernie all over again.

[FSogol]

4. O'Malley announces a comprehensive water plan that is better than all other candidates

Last edited Mon Nov 9, 2015, 07:02 PM - Edit history (1)

plans, but he is largely ignored. His water plan builds on his watery accomplishments as Governor of Maryland, a State both containing and surrounded on one side by water.

[bravenak]

8. Exactly.

[MH1]

22. Sadly, exactly. nt

[demwing]

35. "surrounded on one side"

I thought this was hilarious, then I searched it on Google and found it's more widely used than I thought,

[99Forever]

72. I see what you did there.

[JaneyVee]

5. Bernie supporters convinced Bernie invented water.

[upaloopa]

7. Then he walked on it.

[JaneyVee]

11. ...

[Dodo]

16. Ah, a repeat of 2008. I seem to recall "Obama Messiah" references.

Not surprising.

[CoffeeCat]

40. Ah yes, making fun of Sanders supporters...

The Clinton camp did this to Obama supporters too. We were positioned as young, college-aged kids who didn't know what they were doing.

When you don't have a popular, clear agenda--and when the bulk of your campaign is funded by your corporate sugar daddies--this is what you do.

When you're a pro-war, neocon who Robert Kagan (a neocon kingpin) praises--this is what you do.

You must try real hard to crush your opponent's supporters and position them as ignorant goofballs. It's the equivalent of an eighth grader telling you to stop hanging around whatshername--because she's sooo not cool.

Maybe we'll feel so bad about ourselves that we'll be so demoralized, and we won't have the strength or the motivation to vote.

It's all about bullshit and tricks with Hillary Clinton.

[Bubzer]

48. Bullshit and tricks indeed. They just posted a clearly skewed poll that favors hillary.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/1251786905
The poll itself states:

Hillary Clinton was rated by a random subset of 801 Democrats and
Bernie Sanders by 764 Democrats during this period.

But somehow, this poll is considered legitimate...

[thucythucy]

52. Um, this entire OP is making fun of Clinton supporters.

Lighten up. The OP was meant to be satire (I assume) and people are responding in kind.

Don't post about water if you can't stand the wet.

[CoffeeCat]

56. Don't comment on the boat if you're going to be a dinghy.

Seriously. While you were standing in the boat, commenting about water, wetness and ice cubes, another conversation started.

I may need to lighten up, but I think your neurons are waterlogged.

[thucythucy]

62. Could be.

On the other hand, it looks to me like you want to change the tone in the middle of the discussion.

First--begin with an OP that satirizes Hillary supporters (and BTW I think the OP is hilarious and very well done).

Then, get all serious and sanctimonious when the other side replies in kind.

Pot and kettle and all that.

Really, we all need to lighten up some, and I think this OP does a great job of satire without some of the venom I've seen from both sides.

[BeanMusical]

96. +1 Totally agree.

[winter is coming]

60. Yup. It was bullshit then and it's bullshit now, although a telling bit of projection. n/t

[Bubzer]

27. As a Dem, that kind of post SHOULD be beneath you... thats something I expect from the GOP.

[7962]

43. Welcome to the real world. The right has no corner on the "rudeness" market

People right here can be equally rude and vicious.

[Laser102]

39. LOL!!

[FailureToCommunicate]

46. Waaaay older than Bernie or even Obama critics: remember this...?

"This is an actual Saturday Night Live monologue from Rev. Jesse Jackson, way back in season 10. He was commenting on how difficult it was to get the press to write a favorable article about him, and then he told this joke.

-- One day Jesse Jackson and the pope was riding this boat. While they were riding the boat, a stiff wind came along and blew the pope's holy cap[sic] off. The pope reached for it and couldn't get it and Jesse Jackson couldn't get it and they said "well what happens now?" Jesse Jackson got up and walked across the water, got the pope's cap, and brought it back and the pope was grateful. He's a very gracious man and he put his cap back on. The press was riding in the next boat over and they start typing about this miraculous event. The next morning the headlines read "Jesse can't swim." --

[upaloopa]

6. Well thanks for all that

I think we are getting bored waiting for Hillary to be nominated. We have all this anti Bernie fodder to fire from our big guns should he over take Hillary but looks like most of it will go to waste.
At least you can keep us engaged.

[CoffeeCat]

55. I remember the exasperated, shocked look on Hillary Clinton's face...

...when she came in third in Iowa in the 2008 Iowa caucuses.

She was "inevitable" right up until she wasn't.

You Clinton supporters are going to need some extra lovin after Bernie wins in Iowa and NH. She was able to pull off a win in NH, but Bernie has been consistently ahead in NH.

Don't worry. Us Bernie supporters will catch you when you fall.

[upaloopa]

65. You have 3 months to do what you haven't

done in the last six.

[Lordquinton]

67. Obama did it.

And he had a much lesser chance than Sanders does.

[bvar22]

91. The night Edwards finished 2nd to Hillary's 3rd in the Iowa Caucus...

...was a night to remember.

[CoffeeCat]

94. Iowans are soft on Hillary...

Most people don't understand the underlying dynamics in Iowa. Iowa Democrats are extremely Progressive, and there is a very large Progressive contingent within the Iowa Democratic party. This is how Obama won the Iowa caucuses.

Furthermore, it is why Hillary came in third in the caucuses, the last time around.

She does not politic well here in our state. She's canned, corporate and everyone understands (despite her recent running to the left) that she is not a true Progressive. Now, if this was a Southern state where people are more moderate or conservative, I would say that Hillary would have a better chance. But that's not the case in Iowa.

The majority of Iowa Democrats are looking for any reason to support anyone but Hillary.

Sanders was beating her in Iowa, during the late summer. However, now the tide has shifted and she's winning by 15 points now. This is still a competitive race. Hillary seems to have hit the apex of her "inevitability" and she could see major poll losses as the Feb 1 Iowa caucuses draw near.

Bernie is laying the foundation in other states. He's got some work to do in Iowa. When he was here in the summer, he drew extremely large crowds. He just needs to return back to the state and get his campaign into forth gear. I'm sure that's what he'll do.

Ground game is important too and I think Sanders will have the edge in that arena. Sanders supporters are young, energetic and there are a lot of them. This is the base of the party that does most of the work.

I saw what happened to Obama in Iowa. I had front-row seats. Clinton was gobsmacked by her third place. Obama slowly ramped up and Iowans were drawn to him. There's no reason to believe that won't happen again. People need to remember that Obama's ascendance in Iowa had as much to do with his incredible campaign--as it did about Iowans being very soft in their support for Hillary. This dynamic could easily happen again.

[sabrina 1]

9. They're scared, that's all. And they really shouldn't be, Bernie will make a great president!

[jberryhill]

10. Not true - Hillary has called it "damp" and "moist", but not "wet"

[Art_from_Ark]

17. With what she knows *today*,

she would not be in favor of calling it "wet".

[jberryhill]

18. But all of the Republicans think it is bone dry

So there's that.

[Maedhros]

19. If water is still an issue when she is President, she'll tell us if it's wet or dry at that time./nt

[SammyWinstonJack]

38. Hehe.

[bvf]

74. But it's an idea worth considering. n/t

[BooScout]

12. Sanders ship sinks....

News at eleven.

[2pooped2pop]

44. you better hope not

The way Hillary is copying everything he does, she will surely follow.

[Bubzer]

49. +1

Very good point!

[bvf]

75. +2. Nice!

[olddots]

13. this becomes a Wet Dream for the clown car

which has run out of gas .

[bvf]

14. Was he LYING THEN....or lying NOW?????...

...so somebody here must...excuse me...too many conversations to KEEP TRACK of...present or PAST TENSE???....

WHY cant I get A straight ANSWER from anyONE????

[cosmicone]

15. Bernie has power over water

He parted the Atlantic to come here

[Spitfire of ATJ]

21. Walking on it wasn't Jewish enough for you?

[cosmicone]

33. Moses parted the red sea

since Bernie is more powerful than Moses, he has to part the Atlantic

[Spitfire of ATJ]

54. The Right used to show Obama riding a unicorn shooting out rainbows.

[beam me up scottie]

66. Yep, the messiah meme was created by right wing assholes to insult liberals.

Interesting to see who's using it this time around.

[beerandjesus]

84. That would be the right-wingers.

Yep, I said it. Alert away.

[JimDandy]

98. I've been watching that closely myself.

Very interesting indeed.

[azurnoir]

20. and then the Hillary campaign announces this is the gold standard for water

[SoapBox]

31. ROFL

[Bubzer]

50. ...

[Lordquinton]

69. Meanwhile

Trump warns against becoming addicted to water

[Volaris]

92. Alright, you win the thread.

Dehydrated Water...LOL!

[TheFarS1de]

26. K&R

It is fairly obvious after a few days perusing the forums . Well stated

[demwing]

29. I was expecting to not like this

I was wrong

[SoapBox]

30. Oh! You are SO good!

3, 2, 1...to the Alert that you are in violation of the TOS, for something to do with water!

[w0nderer]

36. K & R N/T

[2pooped2pop]

41. that's a pretty accurate

assessment of how it works here. Too funny.

[treestar]

45. pointless infighting flame bait

[Warren Stupidity]

58. Oo. Very bitter.

[99Forever]

47. Precisely.

Bravo.

[beam me up scottie]

51. And the inevitable jury results:

AUTOMATED MESSAGE: Results of your Jury Service
Mail Message
On Mon Nov 9, 2015, 08:06 PM an alert was sent on the following post:

Sanders announces that water is wet.
http://www.democraticunderground.com/1251786874

REASON FOR ALERT

This post is disruptive, hurtful, rude, insensitive, over-the-top, or otherwise inappropriate.

ALERTER'S COMMENTS

Divisive flamebait.

You served on a randomly-selected Jury of DU members which reviewed this post. The review was completed at Mon Nov 9, 2015, 08:12 PM, and the Jury voted 1-6 to LEAVE IT.

Juror #1 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #2 voted to HIDE IT
Explanation: Agree with alert.
Juror #3 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Divisive to whom? There are so many things to divide us but this isn't one of them...
Juror #4 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #5 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Silly but not hide worthy.
Juror #6 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: No explanation given
Juror #7 voted to LEAVE IT ALONE
Explanation: Oh please, enough with the faux pearl clutching. Stop alert stalking Bernistas.

I'm going to rec the op just because I can.

[Ned_Devine]

70. Who alerted this? And I thought one of the other posters in this thread won the "wet blanket" award!

[beam me up scottie]

71. No idea.

Whoever it is should use the trash thread feature instead of trying to ruin it for the rest of us.

[beerandjesus]

86. You can probably find them over at hillaryclintonsupporters.com

[Hydra]

73. There's always that one person, isn't there?

[Autumn]

57. A delightful OP and thread

thank you

[beam me up scottie]

59. I enjoy satire when it's well done.

Manny's is usually superb as well.

[Autumn]

61. Manny's is always superb, but after reading this I fear our dear Manny has competition

Serious competition.

[beam me up scottie]

63. I've been a Warren Stupidity fan for years!

We need to keep the good stuff kicked!

[Autumn]

64. This one is definitely worthy of notice.

Most assuredly.

[PatrickforO]

76. I'm sick of this false meme about how we evil Bernie supporters are driving

people away from Bernie.

I'm sorry, but I'm calling BULLSHIT on that position.

The thing is, I'm gonna look at where each candidate stands on the issues and vote my best interest. The general obnoxiousness of that candidate's supporters only makes up a teeny-tiny bit of that decision.

Though, I should point out that I do look at surrogates and I pay attention to what is said. When I see wedges being driven, then I fight back for my own candidate. See, because it's the Clinton people yelling the loudest about this, but the reality is we all tend to be the most critical of other people who mirror our own faults, and I'm seeing some serious wedges being driven.

Clinton in my opinion isn't a stateswoman. She cares more about being elected than she does about us, and she says whatever she thinks she has to to make that happen. And, her campaign actively uses surrogates to do the dirty work. And we've heard it all: oh, he's a socialist. He's unelectable. He has problems with African Americans. He has problems with Hispanics. His supporters are old white male liberals who drive Volvos. Just a bunch of wedges and dirty politics.

But you know what? Bernie keeps on talking about the real issues. And I keep on supporting him. I'm sick of oligarchs pissing down my back and telling me its raining. I want some serious economic justice. I want the corporations to pay their fair share of taxes. I want us to rebuild our infrastructure and aggressively pursue renewable energy. I want my children and grandchildren to have free tuition at state colleges. I want single payer healthcare. I want the Social Security payroll tax cap removed so that Social Security can remain strong for my generation and the next two. I want the drug war ended and prisons de-privatized.

So am I evil? Am I alienating people so they don't support Bernie?

I think not.

[stillwaiting]

80. SOME Hillary supporters are trying to manipulate the undecideds. That's all it is.

They are actively trying to paint Bernie supporters (and they are lumping ALL of us together - bless their hearts) as horribly bad people. Racist! Sexist! Eats their boogers!

Now, who would want to be one of THOSE people!!

It's a political move, and it could work on some really tuned out and easily swayed individuals. I really don't think it will work on many people though. It's so transparent.

They can't really criticize Bernie on the issues very easily (Hillary is worse on just about all of them) so they paint his supporters as unhinged FREAKS. No one wants to be one of those people!

[jeff47]

81. Gotta drive that wedge in somehow. Otherwise we'd have to campaign on issues. (nt)

[Romulox]

83. Bernie supporters are driving DU's *most conservative* posters to Hillary! For reals! nt

[bvar22]

100. None of DUs "most conservative" posters would support Bernie anyway.

They can all go back to the Reagan Party where they came from.

[lark]

85. Silly and a waste of time.

[sammythecat]

87. This is perfect! Good job. n/t

[George II]

93. In his announcement he proclaimed several times.....

.."I marched with Aquarius many years ago."

[Doc Holliday]

97. In other news:

GOP Presidential hopeful Ted Cruz (R-TX) appearing on Sean Hannity's broadcast responded that "...neither Sanders nor Clinton is an oceanographer. They should leave science to the scientists."

Fellow hopeful Donald Trump announced in a press conference that his (Trump's) water "will be bigger, deeper, and way wetter than anything those losers could come up with."

Former Florida Governor Jeb! Bush expressed the opinion that "the whole water thing really needs closer study."

Dr. Ben Carson's actual response was unclear; he started telling a long and meandering story about how he nearly drowned as a teenager.

[grahamhgreen]

101. This shows exactly why Bernie will never get the snow vote!!!