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Jody Lane

(19 posts)
Tue Oct 29, 2013, 03:59 PM Oct 2013

Biblical Health Care: The article that wasn’t

On the road yesterday I was channel surfing through a mind-numbing fog of white noise on the radio when a sudden shrill and startling sound bite caught my attention and stayed my furiously tuning fingers.

“Next up, the Christian origins of Halloween…”

Wait. What?

Distracted I barely missed the black cat that dodged into the road. But I had to hear more.

According to the host and her guest, there is so little known of the Gaelic harvest festival Samhain that even postulating that modern day Halloween is rooted in the pagan custom is preposterous. They went on for quite some time discrediting the myth that Christians co-opted the ancient seasonal ritual as a wicked ruse perpetuated by Satan himself. Much like the devil’s diabolical invention of evolution; it is an evil lie to force good Christians into thinking!

Very fascinating stuff.

Just as I am mesmerized by the information that enters Glenn Beck’s brain and fuses together at a base cellular level into the bizarre bullshit that spews out of his mouth, I couldn’t change the station.

I learned…a lot.

I learned that store-bought costumes are generally safe from demonic possession. However, Pat Robertson recommends that home-made costumes made with items from Goodwill should be blessed with prayer to vanquish any lingering evil residue that the donor may have harbored. Detergent alone simply won’t do.

I learned that women who dress in witch costumes can be unwittingly tricked into becoming the wanton whores of demons. In fact, it is really just an open invitation to be marvelously sexually devoured by deviant little devils.

I learned that Christian parents need to be wary of school and community fall festivals because any event celebrating the change of seasons might suggest to their jealous and suspicious God that there is some “tree or earth-like” worship going on. That can only lead to orgies in public parks. It is known.

I learned that there are an insane amount of paid commercials during Christian radio shows.

Through one of these commercials, I learned about Health Care Sharing Ministries. More particularly, I learned about Medi-Share, “…affordable, biblical health care. (Not available in Montana).”

According to the ad, “It’s nation-wide network of Christians who save money by sharing each other’s medical bills.”

Now this is really fascinating stuff! Socialized health care for Christians and Libertarians? Why the hell is it not available in Montana, I wondered.

Later, after a quick Google search, I learned that I am apparently the last person in this country to know about biblical health care as a strangely socialized alternative to the Affordable Care Act. Imagine my disappointment when I realized that the diatribe I was forming in my head had already been written and published – everywhere.

There goes today’s article. I have little to add to the mountain of information I found. If, like me, you have never heard of this insurance scheme either, I offer you the links below to peruse at your leisure for your comments and further discussion.

Meanwhile, I have to go work on my witch costume.




http://www.healthcaresharing.org/

http://open.salon.com/blog/steve_klingaman/2010/05/26/top_100_in_healthcare_darling_pimps_libertarian_insurance

http://luisgranados.com/blog/?p=1623

http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2001/april2/8.23.html

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Biblical Health Care: The article that wasn’t (Original Post) Jody Lane Oct 2013 OP
Don't forget that candy companies bring in witches to curse candies given out on halloween xfundy Oct 2013 #1

xfundy

(5,105 posts)
1. Don't forget that candy companies bring in witches to curse candies given out on halloween
Tue Oct 29, 2013, 07:18 PM
Oct 2013

so that the kids who get them will be tricked into worshipping th' debbil!

Even if them witches can't get into some factories, they target the distributors' trucks. Beware! You can't trust your children to anyone but a priest who wants them to come to sleepovers.

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