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onager

(9,356 posts)
Thu Jan 7, 2016, 09:00 AM Jan 2016

God asked to intervene in Vanilla-ISIS standoff

(NOTE: posted in Atheists/Agnostics Group, a safe haven, etc. etc.)

Vanilla-ISIS. Y'all Qaeda. Hezbubbah. Yokel Haram. The Ranch Davidians. The Bundy Welfare Queen Brigade. Meal Team Six.

Whatever you call them - you know, those idiots who seized a bird sanctuary in Oregon, and are currently being mocked all over social media by sane Americans of every political persuasion.

Well, we can all relax. While most of the 1,237 GOP presidential candidates have wisely stayed out of this goat-rope, Ted Cruz and Chris Christie have appealed to a Higher Authority:

Cruz offered prayers for law enforcement officers confronting the group and criticized the group for threatening an armed resistance...

(Christie) said he's prayed for the law enforcement officers and government officials involved in attempting to end the standoff.

http://www.cnn.com/2016/01/04/politics/oregon-standoff-republicans-2016-election/

This worries me because of the Xian God's well-known track record of "moving in mysterious ways." Now that he's been invoked, it won't surprise me if this minor stand-off lasts for years, costs thousands of lives, and ends in a nuclear explosion.
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God asked to intervene in Vanilla-ISIS standoff (Original Post) onager Jan 2016 OP
I wish he'd get that world peace thing accomplished first. Scuba Jan 2016 #1
IMO, we can all relax... Freelancer Jan 2016 #2
How can you mock prayer's perfect track record?! Arugula Latte Jan 2016 #3
LOL! Here's something to say when asked if you're religious... Freelancer Jan 2016 #4

Freelancer

(2,107 posts)
2. IMO, we can all relax...
Thu Jan 7, 2016, 01:09 PM
Jan 2016

I have it on good authority that Ted Cruz had his fingers crossed behind his back when he invoked God in his prayer. And immediately afterward, he pulled out a chair, walked around it three times and sat down. That's a pretty bulletproof counter-cootie combo.

Christie knocked wood, which, under normal circumstances, is enough to deflect a backlash whammy. In this case, I'd say that it might not be enough. But then, the prayer was said in New Jersey, and it's obvious that God hasn't heard prayers from New Jersey for quite a while. So... we should be alright.

(Said facetiously, of course).

Freelancer

(2,107 posts)
4. LOL! Here's something to say when asked if you're religious...
Thu Jan 7, 2016, 09:34 PM
Jan 2016

Well... it's like this... I was in line, on a cloud, waiting to go to Earth. The ones just ahead of me were set to go to the Graham family, to the Cruz's and the Santorums. When it came to me, the angel scratched his halo, and said "sorry kid, were all out of religiousness. The last three have us tapped-out. How 'bout an extra 30 IQ points, and a big ol' dollop of sarcasm instead?" Deal!

If you can't change minds, at least give people something to talk about in the break room -- that's my philosophy.

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