‘I’m from the Vatican, you’re f*cked!’

[Warren Stupidity]

A parish priest is facing a lifetime ban and loss of his career with the Church of England after he was awakened from a drunken stupor in a courtyard in the middle of the night and brawled with police and emergency workers, reports CourtNewsUK.

According to a police report, Gareth Jones, 36, sought diplomatic immunity and bizarrely claimed that he represented the Pope, stating, “I’m from the Vatican, you’re f*cked” after a night of heavy drinking that included wine, gin, beer and vodka.

Jones is currently suspended from his position at St Mary and the Virgin in Great Ilford which is part of the Church of England — not the Catholic church.

Police state that when a paramedic attempted to help Jones, who sprawled on the ground on Charing Cross Road, he warned the emergency worker, “I am going to f*ck you up.”

https://www.rawstory.com/2016/06/im-from-the-vatican-youre-fcked-parish-priest-suspended-after-drunken-brawl-with-police/

[hrmjustin]

1. His mother should have taught him not to mix his drinks.

[muriel_volestrangler]

5. I think it was the sheer quantity

which was pretty impressive - it must have been a night out to behold:

Parish priest Gareth Jones, 36, yelled: ‘I have diplomatic immunity’ as he punched, kicked, bit and spat at a police officer and a paramedic who found him passed out in his clerical frock on Charing Cross Road, in Covent Garden, central London.
...
Jones threatened to attack Mr Pollock but was unable to stand up after downing three bottles of wine, several pints of beer, a number of gin and tonics and vodka during a binge of Biblical proportions.
...
He told officers he had been drinking at El Vino and The George on Fleet Street before heading to a nightclub in Soho, adding: ‘I am utterly ashamed and sorry for any harm that I have caused.’
...
Mr Hockley told the court that Jones had consumed around 53 units of alcohol before the incident and is seeking help to deal with alcoholism.

http://courtnewsuk.co.uk/vicar-fined-drunken-brawl-police/

One 'unit' is 10ml of pure alcohol; a 700ml bottle of vodka has 28 units, so he'd more or less drunk the equivalent of 2 bottles of vodka.

[Cassiopeia]

2. Well, at least no children seem to be involved.

[Cartoonist]

3. A misspent youth

At his hearing before a magistrate it was revealed that, prior to becoming a priest, Jones had a criminal history that included making a false bomb threat, marijuana possession, fraud and criminal damage.

I'm OK with the marijuana possession.

[Fumesucker]

4. Reminds me of a Robin Williams routine

[cleanhippie]

7. !

[trotsky]

9. OH SNAP

Good thing those who are perpetually offended by the truth can't actually get the post deleted.

[onager]

10. Yeah, that's funny.

Whenever I see a hidden post, first thing I do is click "Show." So if the censors are really trying to keep others from reading those post - Epic Fail.