Struggling Marlins Begin Construction On New Stadium

[El Supremo]

I'm giggling so hard, I peed my pants!

MIAMI—After a disappointing start to their inaugural season in Marlins Park, Miami Marlins owner Jeffrey Loria unveiled plans Friday to build a new waterfront stadium at Mid-Beach, tentatively called Marlins Field. "We made a lot of great memories at Marlins Park, but our fans need a modern facility capable of housing a winning team," said Loria, who expects funding for the project to be approved by the city and county governments. "This is something we can't solve just by renaming the team the Southeastern Miami Marlins, changing our colors to maroon and gold, hiring a new manager, and installing a sculpture of a giant mermaid who dances with six glittering, spinning marlins every time the team hits a home run, though certainly we will do all of those things." Loria said the Marlins will be conducting yet another fire sale to rid themselves of their recently signed star free agents, but added that he hopes the new stadium will be able to draw star free agents to Miami.

http://www.theonion.com/articles/struggling-marlins-begin-construction-on-new-stadi,29042//[div]

[trumad]

1. Posted by the man with two sports avatars.

[El Supremo]

6. What is the difference between a bucket of shit and an Florida Marlins fan?

The bucket.

[trumad]

7. So says the douche with two baseball avatars.

Oh---lookie--- The Rockies suck---let's jump on the Texas bandwagon.

[El Supremo]

8. What's the difference between an Florida Marlins fan and a carp?

One is a bottom-feeding, scum sucker, and the other is a fish.

[trumad]

9. Here ya go..

I guess you'll be rolling two logos this football season.

BTW: You do realize that the stinky Marlins have 10 more wins than the Rockies?

[El Supremo]

10. Why doesn't Jacksonville have a professional baseball team?

Because then Miami would want one.

[trumad]

11. Wait for it---wait for it..

ahh there's the Rockies logo.

[El Supremo]

12. What song do Florida Marlins fans sing before the bottom of the ninth inning?

Nobody knows. There's never any of them left.

[trumad]

15. How many world series championships

has El Supremo's flip flopping avatars won?

[madinmaryland]

17. ** crickets **

[El Supremo]

18. What does an Florida Marlins fan do when his team has won the World Series?

He turns off the PlayStation.

[madinmaryland]

20. What does an Colorado Rockies fan do when his team has won the World Series?

We'll never know.

[El Supremo]

21. Why did BP hire the Pittsburgh Pirates to clean up the Gulf oil spill?

Because they'll go out there and throw in the towel!

[madinmaryland]

22. Do you realize the Pirates are only ONE game behind the Texas Rangers

in their record?

[El Supremo]

23. How did the Pittsburgh Pirates fan die from drinking milk?

The cow fell on him!

Goodnight!

[madinmaryland]

24. I did survive trying to tip a cow!

[madinmaryland]

13. Heh...

At least cboy4 didn't have flip-flopping avatars/logos!!

[El Supremo]

14. What do you call a Cowboys fan with half a brain?

Gifted.

[madinmaryland]

16. So you lost the other half of your brain when you became a Tebow/Bush fan???

[El Supremo]

19. Why is Tony Romo unable to answer a telephone?

He can't find the receiver.

[TZ]

25. this subthread is hilarious

I'm going to have to catalog away some of these insults for future use.

[madinmaryland]

26. I'm sure you will.

[RockaFowler]

2. Who likes their own posts??

That's really juvenile. But what else should we expect from El Tebow!

[TZ]

3. sorry to say this

But I took great pleasure in booing Ozzie yesterday when he came out on the field. So wanted him thrown out so he would pitch a real fit. LOL

[RockaFowler]

4. Can I boo him, too??

You know how much I hate that team now. I'm so ready for Football season it's not even funny!!

[Kingofalldems]

5. Ozzie was harrassing Suzuki the entire game on Saturday