A Story and a Tribute
Forgive me everyone; I haven't been around much lately and probably won't be for the near future. I received a phone call from my father early Tuesday afternoon, unusual as we are not on the best of terms. I answered, begrudgingly, as I was getting dressed for work. He told me that my grandmother, that is my mom's mother, had passed away. I'd like to tell you a bit about her tonight. Forgive me as this is as much for me as it is for anyone who reads it, but I felt I needed to say something, that I needed to convey to you some image of a person who had brought me indescribable joy and happiness my entire life.
She was born in a small coal town in PA, excelled in school and graduated high school at 16 around the time of WWII. She and her sister moved from that small town to Washington DC and took a job working for the war effort. Subsequently she went to school for nursing and soon after at the age of 19 married my grandfather. In those days women didn't work after getting married. So she quit. They moved to a nice town closer to home, but the desire to help others--nursing--never left her mind, regardless of what the establishment might think. She defied convention and went back to school again. Graduated with a 4.0 and took a nursing job regardless of what others thought. She would end up working as a nurse for more than 35 years and then volunteering as one for 13 more after retirement.
That was her through and through. She took no excuses and fought for her dreams. Nursing was one of them. Flying was another. She wanted to learn how to fly. Again, a daunting challenge for a 1950's "housewife" and a Catholic to boot. But she didn't care. And she did learn how to fly--although admittedly she never found much use for it afterward as she was both busy with family and career.
Personally, to me she was the sweetest, kindest, most amazing person I have ever met. She was strong in her convictions and wonderfully giving. No joke, she never said a cross word to me in my life. Ever. Spending time with her was like Christmas morning, every time.
She was adamantly anti-war. Believed in the change that President Obama promised in 2008. And even just a few years ago blurted out of no where that she thinks that any two people who love each other are good with her. Much to the shock of some of our Catholic relatives. She was a strong woman, living on her own (my grandfather having died some twenty years prior), and being completely independent up until the very end. Even in the final weeks of her life, she didn't let people see in how bad of shape she, in reality and in hindsight, was. I spoke to her less than two days before she died, and she was talking about hoping the weather would be good so she could go out and weed the garden.
She passed away in her sleep, peacefully, late Monday night. I wish that I could share with you just how much she meant to me. I wish that you all could have had her in your lives, or at least someone like her. It makes all the difference in the world.
In the end, I don't ask for pity or sorrow. I'm an atheist and do not believe in anything after or beyond, but that doesn't matter. She lived a good life, and died exactly as she wanted--painlessly and not a burden to others. And I have not lost her despite how abruptly or unexpectedly she departed. I carry her with me every day in my heart and in my actions. If an 86 year old Catholic woman can love me for who I am, can fight for what is right, and stand up for and achieve her dreams despite what many in "mainstream" society had said, then I think we can do anything. We all can. We can achieve our dreams. We can be happy. We can love and be loved. And we can, most of all, find fulfillment in whatever our hearts' desire.
Have a great night everyone.
-F
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As you were so proud of her.
Be FEARLESS!
