Peasants: I took federally-subsidized transport to work today. Stand while I tag what I'm wearing.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

Photo of transport similar to what I was on this morning. These people are members of the proletariat, and their choice of attire, if that's what you want to call it, is far inferior to mine.



My wardrobe came from these exclusive locations. Please envy me in respectful silence and refrain from gasping.

#Unique thrift store, Hillandale, Maryland (JCPenney polo shirt, and like my other JCPenney garments, of much higher quality that you would guess) #neighbor's trash pile, about a year ago (t-shirt with logo "Climb". Beats me.) #Goodwill, I think (Gap belt) #yard sale in November 2013 (Kohl's Urban Pipeline jeans. And I really cleaned up at that sale) #Christ House thrift store (Ralph Lauren briefs) #Twig thrift store, maybe (Brooks 15th anniversary running shoes. I got two pairs. Brand new; perfect fit) #new, probably, but I don't know where I got them (Gold Toe or equivalent socks) #Value Village, Adelphi, Maryland (Bailey Stampede cowboy hat; my greatest find ever at a thrift store. My size, and only $3.99) #Craigslist ad, August 2015 (Nocona cowboy boots. I'm taking off the Brooks running shoes and changing into my cowboy boots) #Otage wrist watch (yard sale, maybe three years ago. The analog part is broken, but the digital display works) #necklace made of some sort of white rocks (another yard sale)

You may sit down now.

There is no need to reply. Your selections will not be as nice as mine.

[Glorfindel]

1. I remain standing in awe of such sublime shopping skills

[fierywoman]

4. Me too!

[central scrutinizer]

2. Why do you hate capitalism?

It's your duty as an American to shop, shop, shop and be heavily in debt.

[mahatmakanejeeves]

3. Your answer must be in blue-black ink on 100% rag content paper. Please resubmit. NT

[Major Nikon]

5. I get a lot of work clothes from ebay

People often buy brand new stuff that's being closed out and resale on ebay at prices that are still way below retail. Another ebay seller I use sells shoes that are 3rds which means they were returns. People often buy shoes online, try them on, and when they don't fit they send them back. With leather soled shoes you can tell they are new because there's no wear on the soles that comes from the first time they hit the pavement.