So the New Pope says that dogs (and pets) can go to Heaven

[NightWatcher]

http://time.com/3631242/pope-francis-dogs-heaven-catholic-church/

The head of the Catholic Church promises that some dogs, at least, do go to heaven

Pope Francis confirmed during his weekly address in the Vatican’s St. Peter’s Square that canines, along with “all of God’s creatures,” can make it to heaven.

The leader of the Catholic Church made the remark in order to comfort a young boy who was mourning the death of his dog, according to the New York Times.

“One day, we will see our animals again in the eternity of Christ. Paradise is open to all of God’s creatures,” said the 77-year-old Pontiff, according to Italian news sources.

This raises several questions:

Was the Pope lying to the sad boy in an attempt to comfort him?

If pets can go to Heaven, will pitbulls be allowed in?

Will pets be allowed in or only if their owners get in too? If we go to Hell does that mean that our pets do too?

What if we go to Heaven, but one of our cats is a little shit. Is that jerk getting into Heaven on my coattails?

Are owners responsible for their own pets? If so, my wife has had something like 5 dogs and 6 or 7 cats so far. That's too many animals for one mansion. Will pets still have to use a box and/or be walked in Heaven? Jesus, the last thing I want to do is have to is scoop a litter box every day. Wow, Heaven's going to be a loud, smelly place if they poop in the afterlife.

[marym625]

1. seriously?

I am shocked this is news. Not you. K&R the post. I just always believed (when I believed in god) that animals went to heaven.

Favorite twilight zone was a guy and his dog weren't tricked into a fake heaven when they wouldn't allow the dog in. Guy said he wasn't going through the pearly gates if his dog couldn't go. Then st. Peter finds the dude and takes both the guy and his dog to the real heaven.

[rurallib]

5. Aye - in my 12 years in Catholic school they learned me well

that animals could not go to heaven because they could not choose right from wrong.
Yep, that is what they told me.
over and over and over again.

[marym625]

6. I went to Catholic School too. grade school and 1 year

High school. Never heard that. Or if I did, I blocked it out.

[rurallib]

12. Not surprised - On forums I have found that

others heard different things than I did and I heard stuff they didn't.
Don't know what accounts for that difference, but let us simply say there were some edges that were not tucked tightly.

[marym625]

15. Some Catholic schools were progressive

Others came from the dark ages. Just like now. The pastor of my aunt's church in Chicago accepts LGBT people and is open and loving for all. Then you have cardinal George. Arrogant, homophobic asshole.


My school was from the dark ages. A girl in my second grade class was killed in a car accident on her way to get her communion dress. The pastor came in and told us she wasn't going to heaven because she had not received communion or gone to confession. Same dick expelled 3 boys in 4th grade because their hair touched their collar. Sent them home in the middle of the day, no bus, no call to parents.

But my grandmother, who was a devout Catholic, was progressive and kind. That's the stuff that stuck with me.

[Arugula Latte]

2. Do people really believe these cockamamie tales?

I mean, seriously, a dead carpenter from ancient Judea lives in fluffy clouds and if you're good you get to go there and see Muffin and Buster (not to mention Grandpa and your old 3rd grade teacher) again?

And if "all of God's creatures" make it in, well, does that include every creature that has ever lived? We get to consort with slime mold, pre-human hominids, unicellular creatures, dinosaurs, spiders, and wombats? How about deep sea creatures, are all of those up there, too? If so, is there an ocean or do they become cloud dwellers? How about critters like these, are these "God's Creatures" too? If so, have they been waiting in Heaven for eons?



I'm sorry, but just how fucking stupid do you have to be to believe this nonsense?

[Skittles]

4. some people simply cannot take reality

I'm fine with them believing such nonsense as long as they don't thump, socially or politically

[Prisoner_Number_Six]

7. They have to be as stupid as me.

I believe it, and I'm not the least bit embarrassed to stand in the middle of a crowded room and say so.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

8. If you believe that you'll go to heaven with your actual body,

you have to believe there will be other organisms there, too, since we need certain bacteria for our digestive systems to function. And if there is no yeast, how can there be beer in heaven?

It's complicated.

[Major Nikon]

18. Jebus can turn piss into Guiness, which is ironically the opposite of what I do

[UTUSN]

3. Here's Gawker's droll take on it:

*********QUOTE*****

http://gawker.com/cool-pope-just-making-stuff-up-about-heaven-now-1670266333
Cool Pope Just Making Stuff Up About Heaven Now

It is becoming increasingly clear that Cool Pope "Francis" (a nickname)—though he is certainly cool and wacky and generally chill—is just making stuff up as he goes along. Do dogs go to heaven? Sure, why not?

The cool Pope is known for things like dissing capitalism and being okay with porn and generally being the type of Pope who is ready to rap with you about how ganjah was found growing on the grave of Solomon. Now, the way the Catholic church has generally worked is, it's a big deal for the Pope to say something is or is not holy and shit like that—sometimes they argue over these things for hundreds of years! But cool Pope is casting all that aside in favor of just, you know, freestyling off the top of the dome, about religious issues.

Historically Catholics have held that animals do not have souls. Cool? Certainly not. So the other day when the cool Pope met some kid whose dog had died, he stone cold told this kid, "Paradise is open to all of God's creatures." How cool is that???? From the New York Times:

Charles Camosy, an author and professor of Christian ethics at Fordham University, said it was difficult to know precisely what Francis meant, since he spoke "in pastoral language that is not really meant to be dissected by academics." But asked if the remarks had caused a new debate on whether animals have souls, suffer and go to heaven, Mr. Camosy said, "In a word: absolutely."

I'll tell you what he meant: "I like dogs and I'm the Pope so dogs are holy now. Deal with it." Cool Pope's style is cool as hell. Just be careful when he starts making pronouncements to the ladies in the club about God's condemnation of wearing panties, etc.

********UNQUOTE*******

[NightWatcher]

9. I love how they can just change dogma willy nilly

Oh yeah, that thing with the no meat on Friday except fish, forget that. Oh and Purgatory and Limbo, yeah forget those too.

Dogs in Heaven, why the Hell not?

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

10. If there are no dogs and cats in heaven I don't want to go there.

Assuming there is such a thing, of course.

[UTUSN]

14. Ha-HAH, I guess it's you and me against the Paradisio!1 n/t

[tavernier]

11. My grandfather would never go into a heaven

where his animals weren't accepted, and he was the epitome of St. Francis. He never put much stock into politicians or religious men, but I think he might give a vote to accept this guy into heaven.

Now... Let's hear more on equal rights, etc.

[TuxedoKat]

13. While reading through this op

I remembered that Pope Francis had taken his name after St. Francis of Assisi, who in addition to being supportive of the poor, was also the patron saint of animals, so it may be that the Pope has given this more thought than people think! I think he may be an animal lover too.

[orleans]

16. it wouldn't be heaven without them. n/t

[mackerel]

17. Obviously the pope doesn't know anything

about cats, they go wherever they choose.

[CanSocDem]

19. Obviously...

...what he means is that there is an after-life and like all living creatures, they too get to experience it. He probably doesn't want to admit that "heaven" is a church copyright and that in truth, everybody gets another chance-----even "bad dogs".

FWIW...there are characteristics of my long deceased dog alive and well in my current pet cat.



.

[dembotoz]

20. so will i meet up with all the cows and pigs i have eaten

the fish that i caught
the bugs i swatted
the bugs i poisoned with black flag

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

22. That could be awkward.

[mnhtnbb]

21. I would rather continue a relationship with many of my pets after we die than with

many people I've known.

DU'er's excepted, of course!