Have we done this before? "I Write Like" (famous author). Mine is Dan BROWN, ugh

[UTUSN]

http://iwl.me/

http://iwl.me/b/cfe99843

This was my text: The key word was in the intro, in which STELTER uttered "90 million per year" with his formerly bland eyes LIGHTED UP. Throughout the interview, the light went on in his eyes, besides a skull-type GRIN of unadulterated idolatry.

The premise was supposed to be how surprisingly to STELTER it had been that BecKKK recently copped to his role in DIVIDING AMERICA. But it took about a quarter of the time allotted with BecKKK weaseling around avoiding this admission and avoiding specific examples before STELTER managed to get a tidbit of admission about calling OBAMA a racist, could THAT have been one of the ways he divided America? Oh, maybe just a teeny bit.

For the first quarter of the time, BecKKK went into his refusal to make eye contact, because, you know, people who make 90 million need to look away because they might petrify you with their direct look at you. Besides that STELTER deferred to let Beckkk ramble on in some attempted depiction of "profundity" while saying nothing.

It all ended with STELTER insisting that the "surprise" of BecKKK is how he has "EVOLVED" with BecKKK reinforcing this with his assertions that those don't evolve are dead and how he gets along with very opposites of him such as one of the lefttiest of the Leftist Liberal rabbis in existence.

Oh, there was almost one of the trademark BecKKK weeping fits, when he described how he no longer allows his spawn to walk with him on the street (of NYC) because once when he used to do that some rude Leftists yelled horrible things at him in front of his spawn. And there came the interminable pause, with BecKKK biting his bottom lip to control himself, and he finally was able to spout what his daughter had said, "Don't they know that you're A DAD?!1'

By the bye, I like to do follow up on things, and this morning in the car where the radio is on the talk station, there was BecKKK doing a vicious segment on PELOSI. I would have thought he wanted to heal the division. Like when I thought Laura INGRAHAM'S conversion to Catholicism would result in some -- oh, I don't know -- SPIRITUALITY and Christ-like behavior?!1

When I looked up STELTER in Wiki I expected to see the CNN STELTER. I don't know which one of these pics is actually him.

[antiquie]

1. I write like Charles Dickens.

I received ads for products to help me be a better writer. I'm not sharing my diary entry.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

2. I write like P.G. Wodehouse.

[hifiguy]

28. That is a GOOD thing.

I always keep a Jeeves & Bertie book or three around. Funniest comedies of manners ever written and he uses the language so beautifully.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

32. I suspect they just use things like word counts and sentence fragments

and some other grammar algorhythm that doesn't have much of anything to do with the actual art of writing. But, still, I don't mind being compared to P.G. Wodehouse.

[NV Whino]

3. Cory Doctorow

[antiquie]

8. Way cool.

I love Cory's stories.

[NV Whino]

12. I'm going to have to check out some of his work

It looks interesting.

[hunter]

26. Same here.

In my dreams it would tell me I write like Hunter.

[wyldwolf]

30. Me, too.

[CBGLuthier]

4. David Foster Wallace

Maybe I should get around to reading him.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

10. Good luck with that. can I say WORDY.

[Xyzse]

5. I write like: Jonathan Swift

Jonathan Swift

I took an old piece of writing from mine, dated 1999.
Perhaps I have changed since then, but I haven't tried something newer. It was written as a timeline.

Cory Doctorow

Is how I write like, when writing an email recently.

[femmocrat]

6. William Shakespeare?!

I highly doubt it! I bet the results are random.

[Aristus]

7. Kurt Vonnegut.

Cool!

[Enrique]

16. you and Sarah Palin

sorry!

i put in her latest:

We believe -- wait, I thought fast food joints -- don't you guys think that they're like of the devil or something?" Palin said. "Liberals, you want to send those evil employees who would dare work at a fast food joint that you just don't believe in -- I don't know, I thought you wanted to send them to purgatory or something. So they all go vegan. And wages and picket lines, I don't know, they're not often discussed in purgatory are they? I don't know, why are you even worried about fast food wages? Well, we believe -- an America where minimum wage jobs, they're not lifetime gigs, they're stepping stones to sustainable wages. It teaches work ethic.

[Aristus]

23. Well...

Vonnegut's non-linear style of writing was a product of non-linear thinking.

Palin's non-linear writing "style" (if you want to call it that) is the product of no thinking...

[hifiguy]

31. The difference between intent (Vonnegut)

and pure random chaos (Princess Dumbass).

[madinmaryland]

20. Huh? I thought you wrote like William Shakespeare.

[sharp_stick]

9. Margaret Atwood?

Holy shit, I chose one of the most profane paragraphs in Trainspotting that I could find and it comes up with Margaret Atwood.

Maybe I confused it with the strange spellings but it sure doesn't look like Atwood to me.

"Choose us. Choose life. Choose mortgage payments; choose washing machines; choose cars; choose sitting oan a couch watching mind-numbing and spirit-crushing game shows, stuffing fuckin junk food intae yir mooth. Choose rotting away, pishing and shiteing yersel in a home, a total fuckin embarrassment tae the selfish, fucked-up brats ye've produced. Choose life."

[Tuesday Afternoon]

11. I write like Ian Fleming ?

I posted a poem that I wrote a few years ago

[frogmarch]

13. I write like Rudyard Kipling.

Riiiiight.

I used the first few paragraphs of a zombie dionsaur story I wrote years ago.

Shafts of moonlight filtered down through the trees that grew ninety feet from the shoreline atop a gentle slope, the pale beams glistening off lush foliage and conifer needles. For hours the night, pungent with pine, hung lustrous and still. Then clouds rolled in from the north and slid over the moon, and a wind thick with the smell of rotting algae and fish slime whooshed up the slope from the warm, shallow sea. Boughs creaked, leaves rustled, cones rattled, and tiny mammals squeaked and skittered in the tossing undergrowth.

The Dryptosaurus was unperturbed by the squall and remained standing behind a magnolia tree, peering out through the swaying branches. Its gaze was fixed on a herd of Triceratops that wallowed in the mud on the shore. These three-horned, rhinoceroslike dinosaurs, the adults weighing up to seven tons, sloshed and snorted in pleasure, oblivious of the wind and unaware of the predator.

Slowly, the clouds rolled away and the wind disappeared. Moonlight reflected off the broad, bony frill at the back of its head as a large adult left the herd and plodded up the slope toward the trees, trailed by a juvenile one-third its size.

[rug]

14. I put in the Terms of Service. Skinner writes like Mario Puzo.

[winter is coming]

15. Margaret Mitchell. Blecch. n/t

[Squinch]

17. Chapter 1 was James Joyce. Chapter 2 was Nabakov. They are nothing like each other.

[Recursion]

18. I get Ray Bradbury. I'm OK with that (ntt)

[Chan790]

19. I usually get David Foster Wallace on these things...

a fact which is not coincidental; Wallace was and is a major literary influence for me as a writer and someone who I have made a habit of attempting to emulate the tone if not the style of as a writer.

This time I used a prompt piece I'd written last week. The prompt exercise is the same every week--we're given a science-fiction or fantasy inspired picture and we're supposed to use it as the inspiration and theme of a short writing exercise. Last week's picture had been of a teenage boy holding some sort of laser rifle with a sash wrapped around his head kneeling on a sand dune next to a Boston Dynamics Big Dog...a robotic quadruped for carrying supplies...a mechanical pack-mule, if you can imagine.

I got L. Frank Baum which is also probably less than coincidental though somewhat less intentional...there is no style similarity that I can see. I did however create a literary joke of sorts...after naming the boy soldier "John Dorothy" (This name the result of choosing two names at random from a character naming-list I use), it seemed necessary that Dorothy's "Dog" be named "Toto" as no other name would have sufficed. I'd have been conscientious of my intentional omission of "Toto" as the name had I gone with "Rufus", "Spot", or "Fido" instead.

{Writing sample excluded as it's simply not on-par with my published work as a writer; I don't want it "out in the wild" so to speak where it can degrade my canon of work.}

[Tuesday Afternoon]

37. yes, you do write like DFW ... Wordy as fuckall. I don't mean that as an insult. Really, I don't -

You both are obviously geniuses. I just don't get that style of genius.

I hate he committed suicide I think his best work was yet to come.

[applegrove]

21. I write like Charles Dickens. I think that is what it told me the last time I took the test.

[JaydenD]

22. James Joyce

I think I just impressed myself.

[Punkingal]

24. I write like Stephen King....

I guess I should feel good about that. But I think it's bullshit.

[Avalux]

25. I write like Chuck Palahniuk.

I wasn't even sure who he was; prolific author, most famous Fight Club.

[hunter]

27. So I used a chapter from a novel I wrote and got Stephen King...

I've never read a Stephen King novel.

I avoid horror fictions, novels or films. There are already too many horrors floating around in my head.

[hifiguy]

29. My audio writing came out David Foster Wallace

and a DU Journal post (that I thought sounded rather Hunter Thompsonish) came out Cory Doctorow,

I wish I could write with the elegant humor of Wodehouse or the rich characterization of Patrick O'Brian or Ray Bradbury, my favorite writers.

[Algernon Moncrieff]

33. Dan Brown

Yep... I, too, got Dan Brown.

Well, if I can have his sales, then I don't mind.

[taterguy]

34. Who the fuck is Xaviera Hollander?

And why the fuck does that website think I write like her?

[UTUSN]

35. Bwah-ha-HAH!1 Whether the real results or your "fertile" brain... n/t

[KamaAina]

36. Tolstoy!

[whistler162]

38. I write like the person who

has submitted 20 manuscripts to a vanity press and has had each rejected and their money returned.