Barbers Forfeits
Rules for seemly behavior. Largely unenforceable laws listed in 18th century barbershops.
First come, first serve- then come not late
and when arrived keep your state;
for he who from these rules shall swerve
must pay the forfeits so observe.
Who enters here with boots and spurs
must keep his nook, for if he stirs
and gives with armed heel a kick
a pint he pays for ev'ry prick.
Who rudely takes another's turn
a forfeit mug may manners learn.
Who reverentless shall swear or curse
must lug seven farthings from his purse.
Who checks the barber in his tale
must pay for each a pot of ale.
Who will or cannot miss his hat
while trimming pays a pint for that.
And he who can't or will not pay
shall hence be sent half-trimmed away.
For will he, nill he, if in fault
he forfeits must in meal or malt,
but mark, who is already in drink,
the cannikin must never clink.
