sorry everyone but being a drummer, I couldn't resist.

[pepperbear]

I LOVE THE DRUMMER SMILIE!

[Mopar151]

1. You might want to be careful who you admit that to......

'Case you catch this dude's karma:

Craigslist post:
I am looking for someone special who would kill my drummer for $100.00.

Do not fear any negative consequences for this act. Any self respecting law enforcement agency would gladly turn the other cheek once they hear this guy "play".

I am tired of hearing his 70's style fills put in the wrong spot and ending one half beat early or late depending on how much he's had to drink. I am tired of him standing up behind his drums between songs and ripping his shirt off and flexing his muscles at wedding receptions where we were hired to play Air Supply, Carpenters , and Ann Murray songs because "chicks dig the pecs, dude".

I am tired of him showing up 20 minutes late for rehearsals then pouting until someone helps him load in his drums, then taking 30 minutes to set them up and needing a smoke break every 15 minutes, then wanting to leave early because "this chick is so fine, I can't say no, and she knows record people dude, so it's for the band."

I am totally done with him calling me up at midnight to play me some damned jazz fusion album from 1981, crying and saying how we shouldn't have sold out to "the man" and asking if I know anyone who can get him some weed knowing full well I smoked twice in 69 and never touched it after that.

I am sick of him farting on stage where the drum mics pick it up and thinking this shit is funny.

I am tired of kicking off slow ballads at well under 80 bpm only to have them morph into the methamphetamine version of flight of the bumble bee, because that's the tempo he "feels" it at.

I am tired of having to carry jumper cables to the gig because "I must have left the dome light on again, dude" instead of admitting his 84 Oldsmobile is a worn out piece of crap.

I am tired of him asking when he's going to get a drum solo.

I am tired of paying his tab at restaurants because "that chick must have stolen my wallet man, but it was worth it 'cause she was a phreak".

I will not move my amp again so he can put another new cymbal on the stage, because "when we learn some fusion I'll need this sound"...please somebody kill this A-hole.

I can't do it because he's my brother and mom would be so pissed off even though she thinks the band would probably sound better too. Besides, if you are good at killing drummers, you could probably make a lot of money in this town.

[progressoid]

2. Ha! I love it.

[geardaddy]

3. That is priceless.

lol

[Doc Holliday]

4. You heard about the tour bus accident?

Twenty people on the bus. All were killed-- ten groupies, the manager, five roadies, three musicians, and the drummer.

[libodem]

5. Ya know what they call a drummer without a girlfriend?

Homeless.

[Ikonoklast]

6. What did the drummer get on his SAT's?

Drool.

[libodem]

7. Thought that was about the banjo player

How can you tell if the stage is level?


The banjo player drools out of BOTH sides of his mouth..

[KamaAina]

8. Did you hear about the band that locked themselves out of their van?

It took them forty-five minutes to get the drummer out.

[libodem]

9. hee hee

Good one.