Grading "essays" I had to slap myself ...

[ashling]

... I was about to write on one paper, "this is so much argle-bargle." I might need an intervention . . . and lots of coffee.

[Locut0s]

1. I don't envy you. My father is a teacher...

Years and years of grading, not fun. But I'm glad you stayed your hand, I always detested teachers who made fun of students on their papers.

I had a high school English teacher who loved to bully kids, she would write mean stuff on their papers. Still hurts to this day, which says more about me than her as I've always had emotional issues.

Edit: which isn't to defend the student, I'm sure what they wrote was utter trash

[ashling]

5. I don't think that would be demeaning

I caught myself because I was about to use a Scaliaism

I tell students to use the writing center when necessary. During a regular semester I will not grade it until they the paper to the writing center for advise and correction and resubmit it. I teach government and history, not english. Rut I swear, sometimes the grammar really makes a paper unclear and unreadable.

The student needs some remedial attention to writing, they need to know. I do try to say it in a kind way, but really!!! ...

[MiddleFingerMom]

6. Obviously, you KNOW how to put it in a kind but firm way. Otherwise:

.
.
.
ashling to sputterinly angry parent: "this is so much argle-bargle"? Why... why why... I was
talking about MY comment.
.
.
.

[ashling]

8. but nobody knows what that means anyway,

so there's that

. . .

anyway, this is college, so I don't deal with parents . . .

[Locut0s]

7. Yeah sorry I've always just been overly sensitive about things...

I too am continually startled at the level of writing ability most students have coming out of high school.

[eppur_se_muova]

9. Actually, it was Tom Tomorrow who introduced "yargle bargle blargh!". :)

Interesting to think that The Two-Fisted Justice is reading TT.

don't know if this is related ...

[ashling]

10. Are you sure it was original with him?

Tracing these things back is sort of a sticky wicket

Did he get it from, maybe, Shakesbeer

from the his play Mickeybeth - the famous new age alternate path seekers scene:

"Yargel, Yargel; toil and Bargle"

Could it have been Isaac Fig Newton:

"For every Argle there is an equal and opposite Bargle"

Or perhaps it was Abraham Lincol:

"You can fool all of the Argles some of the time, and some of the Bargles all of the time
But you cand Argle, Bargle - Blech! "

yes, a sticky wicket, indeed.

[Chan790]

11. Thank you.

You are doing your part to help America stop giving college degrees to people incapable of doing what should be considered middle school work. Seriously, if they can't write grammatically-correct sentences in logically-cohesive paragraphs to express complete thoughts and make cogent arguments, then someone has done them and you, as their collegiate educator, a great disservice in allowing them to pass HS English and receive a diploma.

Normally they pass right through college being incapable of articulate writing and into the real world or graduate school where they continue for the rest of their lives being people who think and write in broken thoughts and are incapable of comprehending anything that takes more than 7 words or 10 seconds to explain.

[Gidney N Cloyd]

13. Worse than that...

I've seen many college instructors and administrators in academic areas over the years who couldn't string a couple of coherent written sentences together to save their lives.

[Stuart G]

12. OH>>>MY>>>>>>Government and HISTORY?????

That is what I taught....high school....yes indeed....did it for more than 25 years.....
...oh my.....yes,..
.....they couldn't write...oh well.....be careful ..it could do something to your brain.....
now...let's see what was that I was saying?????

[kiva]

2. I have to stop myself from writing,

"I'm sure in your mind this makes sense." Really, have to slap the hands.

[femmocrat]

3. Summer school?

Ugh. What a way to spend a lovely summer evening.

[pinboy3niner]

4. At least you weren't tempted to call him/her...

...an Obamabot, a fascist, a traitor-worshipper, or a Greenwald apologist.