"She's a sweet lady." What?????? Not in my experience!

[raccoon]

Somebody said that to me today, referring to my aunt (by marriage) who is, IME, an abusive, angry woman.

Anyone else have relatives or in-laws who are devils but others refer to them as if they were angels?

[Aristus]

1. Nope. When my father's mother was alive,

my own mother referred to her as "the most evil woman I've ever met".

This wasn't garden-variety mother-in-law-daughter-in-law stuff.

I think my mother had the right of it; my Dad never argued with that assessment...

[Scuba]

2. Both my parents were adored by everyone who didn't know them well.

[In_The_Wind]

3. Yep! 2 stepmothers!

[Chan790]

4. I have an uncle by marriage who is generally considered some sort of saint.

Who I know definitively because I'm the one that caught on to him and told my parents (mother and stepfather, uncle in question is stepfather's brother) stole something like $40K from his 90 year old senile father over the span of 6 years. (He was double and triple-charging his father rent.) Unfortunately, that information and evidence were not sufficient to overcome the intra-family "...but he'd never do that!" filter and counter-accusations were leveled over the missing money, destroying family relations for over 15 years at this point. Sainted uncle went on to kidnap his father out of a nursing home despite my parents having durable PoA which barred said uncle, his shrew wife and their adult children from the facility.

Over time, one of the other two siblings came to realize that not only was it all true but that the remaining sister probably was in on it.

Still, no family Thanksgiving since 1997.

[progressoid]

5. Yeah.

My mother-in-law. Actually, to me she's OK, but she's kind of nasty to my wife and her sister.

[tblue]

6. Like someone saying, "You have a great husband"

Or a great mom. How do they know, unless you tell them? No one knows what goes on in intimate relationships.

When we were kids my sister was like your aunt. VERY sweet and charming to everyone but her brother and sister. She was downright evil sometimes but other people gushed over her for being "SO nice"

[Loryn]

7. I think every family has at least one.

I moved from the Los Angeles area to rural Oregon to help with my elderly parents, when my mother had heart surgery four years ago. My dad has Alzheimer's disease, but is still fairly lucid.

My brother is coming to visit in June. He has been abusive to me for most of my life. I will be taking a little vacation during his visit.

Everyone thinks he's just the best thing that ever happened.

Whatever.

[monmouth3]

8. "Street angels, house devils." ~ Mom

[yellowcanine]

9. Is the person who said it known to employ sarcasm?

That could explain it.

[raccoon]

10. I don't know the person, but she only knew my aunt in a professional capacity.

And she was on her good behavior then.

[Worried senior]

11. My mother could fit that role

I remember as a kid when she was mad at me everyone would get such a sweet smile, then she'd look at me with pure hate.

You don't forget that.

[harmonicon]

12. I'm probably one of those people.

I have a friend who referred to me as "divisive friend." I don't have problems with too many people, but there are some people who have real problems with me.