Help! I cannot find my glasses.

[In_The_Wind]

if my post looked funny before. Today will be a hoot until I can find my glasses.
My old pair will do. But o.m.g.


So. Do me a favor. Tell me something funny.
Something that happened in your life because of your time here at DU.
Or even better ... a funny story involving DU.

I'll start: I was called a highly skilled propagandist in my local newspaper. Thank you DU.

Your turn:

[Heidi]

1. I don't hear as well without my glasses or contacts.

It's like all of my senses are impaired. Not funny, but weird.

Mornin', gf!

[In_The_Wind]

2. Oh. G'morning!

I had 'em in bed with me last night. Playing on my laptop with DU in GD.
This morning ... there were a few PMs due to my post last night. I answered all of 'em wearing my old glasses. But now I really do need to laugh.

It's great to see you again my old friend.

[RiffRandell]

3. Prepare for a new Beyonce wrath.

I just saw on the news she uses some "offensive" words in her new song. Can't wait!

[In_The_Wind]

4. Damn it! Now I really gotta find my glasses.

Wrong glasses in LBN will be a pain in my tush.

BTW ~ Your photo in your picture thread: teh hot!
You musta had your pick of many great options back in your dating days.


[img][/img]

[RiffRandell]

5. Haha!

You better---I'm telling you it's coming!

Thanks for the compliment--let's just say I lost count after awhile. Is that bad?

[In_The_Wind]

8. "I lost count after awhile. Is that bad?" Hell No!

If that was bad then I would be bad. And I'm not.

Naughty yes Bad never.






I just invited mr in the wind into my bedroom to find my glasses.
Ready for the poo-storm in LBN
and my first cuppa coffee.

[MiddleFingerMom]

6. I never get tired of it.

.
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.
.
.
DUer: "DUDE... YOU'RE A DUDE?!?!?!?
.
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.
.
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MFM: "Yup.
.
.
.
.
.

[In_The_Wind]

7. Some things are obvious to the feather brain in me! I never doubted the fact that you are all man.

DUDE

[Helen Reddy]

9. Look in the freezer. n/t

[In_The_Wind]

10. Nope. Just ice cream and homemade spaghetti sauce.

but that was funny what you said

[Helen Reddy]

11. I didn't suggest the freezer

because THAT has never happened to ME....



Do you make your own ice cream?

[In_The_Wind]

12. I did make ice cream for Carvel as a location manager on the thru way.

Yes. I do make my own ice cream sometimes.

for the record: I found mr in the wind's car keys in the freezer.
but nothing of mine ever got lost there.

My glasses were under one of my many pillows.

[Helen Reddy]

13. I see n/t

[MiddleFingerMom]

14. "Just ice cream and homemade spaghetti sauce"

.
.
.
I think I'll stick with ice cream and hot fudge sauce, tyvm!!!
.
.
.

[In_The_Wind]

15. oh my. I did it again. They are in separate containers.

btw ~ It's snowing. Your room is ready. I'll buy extra hot fudge sauce just for you MFM

[LiberalEsto]

16. Simon says: put your right hand on the top of your head

Are your glasses there?

I sympathize - I am almost legally blind without my glasses, and if I misplaced them it would be a disaster.

Let's hope you find them VERY soon.

[In_The_Wind]

18. Simon says: put your right hand on the top of your head .........

works most of the time.
When I first started wearing glasses all-of-the-time I was a mess. big time. needed to own two pairs so I could find the missing glasses. Now my photo-gray pair must be in the car. My old prescription reading glasses are among the missing too.


Thank you for your good wish. Positive energy usually helps.
I insisted that mr. in the wind help me find 'em. He was shocked cause usually I want to do everything myself. I did find 'em under a pile of pillows. Near my laptop. I still need to do a bit of reorganizing since our move last Fall. This sucks. Half the space. All of our old stuff! Our community does an annual yard sale. I'll be downsizing till then. Getting rid of the rest before next Winter.

[Aristus]

17. I got the better of a right-winger once during a protest against the Iraq War.

We were holding signs denouncing the war on a busy street corner, and we were getting equal parts honking horns and thumbs-ups, and honking horns and middle fingers, accompanied by angry shouts out of car windows.

One guy yelled at us: "Why don't you leave if you hate America?!"

I smiled and pointed to my Gulf War medals that I had pinned to my coat for just such an occasion. This guy was stopped at the red light, and was shouting at us through his open window. I approached the passenger window and handing him an enlistment form from among a handful I had boosted from the local recruiting station, also for just this type of occurrence. He angrily crumpled it up, and then jetted off in a huff when the light turned green.

It's good to be on the side of the angels...

[In_The_Wind]

19. imo: It's also very good to have you as my friend Aristus!

That was a wonderful funny story.

Thank you.

Are you on your way to work beautiful brown eyes? hmm

[Aristus]

20. I've been here for about 45 minutes already.

There's always a pile of paperwork on my desk to sort through. Tonight's my late-night to stay and reduce the pile a little. Nights that I leave with the surface of my desk actually visible are nights on which to rejoice. Maybe tonight...

[In_The_Wind]

21. I'll keep my fingers crossed for you to have an easy day.

You were really working hard last night.
Fifteen minutes per patient makes lots of paperwork to complete at the end of your shift.

Tomorrow is one of your off days if my memory serves me correctly. Right?

[Aristus]

22. No. I work tomorrow.

But I get off work at the more agreeable time of 5pm.

[In_The_Wind]

23. Ah. I have trouble keeping facts about my new friends straight.

I agree ... off at 5 is better.
I enjoy being at home after the sun goes down

[Aristus]

24. By the way...

your glasses are on the nightstand behind the alarm clock...

[In_The_Wind]

25. Nope. That is where I left my hearing aids.

Too many times I had to strip my bed to find 'em.

The glasses were under 5 pillows on my bed.

Nice try tho

[talkingmime]

26. Look under the couch and behind the toilet. That's where mine usually are.

[In_The_Wind]

28. Nope. Just dust-bunnies, lighters, half eaten almonds under my bed.

Behind the toilet is void. not even a speck of dust.


They were in bed with me.

[talkingmime]

32. "half-eaten"? Who the hell doesn't snarf down almonds? Nom, nom, nom.

[In_The_Wind]

35. Frodo

[IMG][/IMG]

She is so spoiled. That is a Blue and Gold Macaw.

[Aristus]

36. Lovely!

[In_The_Wind]

39. Thank you.

Coffee break time? Or just washing your hands between patients?

[Aristus]

40. Back from lunch. The assistants are rooming the first wave of patients right now.

Washing my hands between patients? Really?

I washed my hands yesterday. No point in overdoing it...



Kidding, of course...

[talkingmime]

38. Damn. She looks just like Kokomo (my dad's B&G). They are LOOOOUUUUUDDDD!!!

He won her in a raffle, built a huge flight in the basement, tried to mate her with another, and finally turned her over to a woman who lives to keep parrots. He still has a small green parrot named Darwin. They're too smart for their own good.

[In_The_Wind]

41. She whispers. She talks, not one cruse word.

She was too young to eat seeds when I brought her home back in May 2001.
There will not be a need to turn her into a breeder. Not my baby.
Yes. She is wicked smart. She has a way of telling me everything she needs or wants.

What kind of parrot is Darwin?

[talkingmime]

46. I'm not entirely sure, but he's about the size of an African gray, except he's green.

I think he's actually a variety of Amazonian but I can't pin him down. Sweet little thing.

You do realize that your macaw is going to live 25 or more years, right? They get smarter as they get older, so watch out. Before long she'll be answering the telephone for you. Worse yet, she might respond to the door bell...

[In_The_Wind]

47. Actually she will live longer than that. The average lifespan is over 70 years.

Winston Churchill's B & G Charlie was 105 last I heard.
Love the video. Poor plummer. Parrots have a way of getting under your skin.

[talkingmime]

48. They live a lot longer in the wild than they do in captivity. I don't know why.

[In_The_Wind]

50. Environmental problems. Birds are very susceptible to toxins.

Frodo gets the same bottled spring water no matter where we go. During her first year I baked a sweet potato for her everyday. She eats almost everything that I eat. I worry about what will become of her when I am gone.

[talkingmime]

51. Someone will look after her. But don't feed her meat. They can't digest it.

[In_The_Wind]

52. She does well eating chicken (loves the bones) and fish.

I have found behavioral differences when she eats beef. not so much on pork. doesn't like turkey or duck.
AND She loves pasta, rice, legumes, all fruit, pizza bones (the crust).
Yep she owns me. Can you tell?

[talkingmime]

53. Still, they shouldn't have meat of any kind. Their digestive tracts can't handle it.

At least that's what my dad taught me. I'll inherit Darwin at some point (my dad is 72). At one point he had Kokomo, Dusty (cockatoo), a cockateil (forget the name), a budgie, and a lovebird. He found homes for all of them except for Darwin. With all of our cats, the only kind of bird I CAN have is a parrot - they don't take shit from anyone.

[In_The_Wind]

54. Sorry to break the news to you but your dad was misinformed.

I've taken Frodo to an avian vet and a holistic practitioner. Frodo is in perfect heath.
So is a rescue Lesser sulfur created cockatoo


Pookie. [IMG][/IMG]

[talkingmime]

55. WOW! That cockatoo isn't feather-picked! Most of them are.

Dusty was bare all the way down his back when my dad got him. He gained back some feathers, but they just don't seem to deal with captivity well. And as for the diet, he obviously is in perfect health but they still don't digest meat. It's like transfats in humans - just passing by.

I love the name Frodo. I'm thinking of naming my next dog Frodo, even if it's a girl. The senior critter in the house is my cat, Gandalf (I know, I changed the spelling a bit).

[In_The_Wind]

56. Alright: feather plucking is caused by many things including diet.

These two parrots lived in my dining room for ten years.
Their owner rented a room in our last house.
[IMG][/IMG]

[URL=.html][IMG][/IMG][/URL]

It is obvious that we disagree about avian diet.
The guidelines you wish to follow will not harm a parrot.
I will continue to follow the advice of the professionals that I took Frodo to.

Feather plucking can be caused by stress: emotional (they are flock animals), environment (too little sunshine, cage cleanliness and of course diet.

Most families are not a good home for a parrot. They required hours of attention every day.

[talkingmime]

57. Oh, that they DO! For some reason, cockatoos are prone to feather picking.

I honestly don't understand it, not having owned a parrot of my own, but they just seem to be stressed all the time. I've tried to nurse abandoned robbins. I hand fed them meal worms. The neighborhood kids brought me both of them because they knew I was "that kind of person".

Both learned to fly (it took some practice) and shit all over the bathroom, but sadly they never learned to feed themselves and both died as young adults. I guess I wasn't so good at teaching them how to peck at larva. I tried. I really tried. I still feel terrible. I loved those birds. I'll try again if the kids bring me another one. I'm basically the neighborhood vet and all the kids know it.

I guess there's only so much you can do, but it still hurts when you fail. I don't know what I did wrong. At least they didn't die in the gutter where the kids found them. They even crapped on the rabbit I rescued - his mother tried to kill him because he was a hermaphrodite.

[In_The_Wind]

58. Is there a wild animal rescue center anywhere near you?

Baby birds are very difficult to nurture. And I cannot advise you on this one.

Thank you for trying Bless your heart.

[tk2kewl]

27. .

[In_The_Wind]

29. .

[img][/img] sweetie. get up off your knees.
you'll hurt yourself down there. ok.
I found 'em.

[bluesbassman]

30. They were on top of your head, weren't they?

I thought so.

[In_The_Wind]

31. Right between my ears.

You know me too well for a cyber thing. Is my computer broad casting again?
If so maybe I should tye my sarong a little better.

[bluesbassman]

33. Certainly not on my account...

I'm somewhat of a connoisseur of a great views.

[In_The_Wind]

34. indeed

I enjoy looking up at nice views as well.

[kcass1954]

37. I think they must be hiding with my keys.

I used the spare set to drive to work. I hope someone's home when I get outta here.

[In_The_Wind]

43. I hope so for your sake. Can you call ahead?

No sense in waiting outside your own home.

[sakabatou]

42. OK

During one of his many trips to London, George Burns became friends with a very wealthy, yet very modest, Jewish chap, named Hyman Goldfarb. On one visit, Hy told George that because of his large donations to charities through the years, the queen wanted to knight him, but he was going to turn it down.

"That's a great honor," George said. "Why would you turn it down?"

"Because during the ceremony you have to say something in Latin," he said. "And I don't wish to bother studying Latin just for that."

"So say something in Hebrew. The queen wouldn't know the difference."

"Brilliant," Hy said, "but what should I say?"

"Remember that question the son asks the father on the first night of Passover? ... 'Why is this night different from all other nights?' Can you say that in Hebrew?"

"Of course," he said. "Ma nishtana ha leila hazeh. Thank you, old sport, I shall become a knight."

At the ceremony Hy waited his turn while several of the other honorees went before the queen. Finally they called his name.

He knelt before Her Majesty, she placed her sword on one shoulder, and then on the other, and motioned for Hy to speak.

Out came "Ma nishtana ha leila hazeh."

The queen turned to her husband and said, "Why is this knight different from all other knights?"

[In_The_Wind]

44. Perfect!

[img][/img]
Well done!

[840high]

62. Love it.

[olddots]

45. my eyesight is geting so bad ......... how bad is it ???

things were blurry so I looked for my glasses for an hour then realized I was wearing them .

Glad you found your glasses ......we can all loose them again tomorrow

[In_The_Wind]

49. I don't think I'll misplace them again that soon.

Maybe we should talk about my missing clothes. I swear I always come home wearing the same closed I left in. But some articles of clothing are missing. poof. gone.

[madinmaryland]

59. We adopted a cat (Sonia) from DUer, Flaxbee. We have had Sonia for exactly

eight years now. She is sleeping next to me on the couch. Flaxbee is not!

[In_The_Wind]

60. imo: Flaxbee should visit you if she can.

You are a good person madinmaryland

[madinmaryland]

61. We have invited her, but she has not come up yet. We have a "little" Sonia now...

Little Sonia (aka Idget) and Big Sonia:



My wife and daughter found Idget under a car out in the parking lot here. She was only about a month old. The picture was taken a couple of weeks after we found here. Big Sonia tolerates her!

[sakabatou]

63. Heaven (video)

[In_The_Wind]

64. That was interesting.