The DU Lounge
Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsWas a sad evening for me last night, we had to put our
German Shepherd down. Her name is Nirmala and she thought we were taking her for a walk! It is so sad to put a pet to sleep. Anybody on here went through that?
I am a basket case right now! Any words you have to console me would be appreciated.
Thanks
beac
(9,992 posts)I wish I had magic healing words. It's so hard to let them go, but it sounds like she had a very happy life with you. Your grief is a sign that you loved her well.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)It is so hard to put a pet to sleep!
beac
(9,992 posts)I know your heart is broken now. Time will help the sharpness of the grief.
And remember that there are lots of wonderful and supportive people over in DU's Pets group.
Ruby the Liberal
(26,219 posts)[font color=navy]Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge.
There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together.
There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor; those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by.
The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent; His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together....
Author unknown... [/font]
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)Ruby the Liberal
(26,219 posts)I teared up when I read your post, so you aren't alone. It is NEVER easy. My heart breaks every time I hear of someone losing their bestest buddy.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)Curmudgeoness
(18,219 posts)It just does not matter how many times I read that, I am always touched. I first heard about this when I lost one of my furbabies, and it never does get easier.
Ruby the Liberal
(26,219 posts)I was crying when I posted it.
kanda
(175 posts)akbacchus_BC; I am so sorry for your loss. The loss of a dearly loved pet is so hard. Death leaves a heartache no one can heal; love leaves a memory no one can steal.
Many hugs to you as you grieve. Keep her memory in your heart. peace be with you.
kanda
Bigleaf
(2,050 posts)Im not sure why you had to euthanize your baby but I'm sure there was a good reason. At least she is no longer suffering in a any way. Im sure she felt your love while she was with you for as long as she was with you. Cry and let it all out. You'll feel the pain for a while. As sad as it is to hear these stories, in a way it makes me feel good as I know there are other caring, animal lovers out there with lots of love to give. Do you have any other animals?
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)painful to see her walk. I know, it was not easy! The vet recommended it a few months ago but we tried with meds and painkillers. You know what hurt the most, she loves to go for walks and she thought she was going for a walk. You have no idea how much we love ou rpets!
Angry Dragon
(36,693 posts)It has always been a hard choice for me.
I have always felt selfish when I did not put a pet down when I should have.
I did not want them to leave me.
It is said to really show love, one must be willing to let them go.
I have always hurt no matter which way they have died.
I remember them all and the love we shared.
I know the decision did not come easy to you.
Know that the pain will lessen and the love will grow over time.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)are there for them and then we have to make painful decisions when they are not well! It was horrible yesterday!
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)And if she could still walk, what was the reason to put her down?
I am just asking because I have a German Shep/Mix who is getting up there in age.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)She was all there, but her hind legs would not support her. We been through that before and it was so sad to let her go!
itsrobert
(14,157 posts)She is all there. Her hind legs support her, but it takes some time for to get up. It's worse when she decides to lie down on a wood floor where she gets no traction. Some days she is playful and some days she wants to be left alone. Sometimes she cannot control her bladder and leaves spots of urine where she has been resting. She is over 13 years. This is the first family pet that my wife and I have had. It's going to be hell when it's time.
Old and In the Way
(37,540 posts)Last edited Fri Jan 13, 2012, 02:33 AM - Edit history (1)
I had an 7 YO Golden who was a delightful dog, was a terrific pet for my young kids, and we treated him as a part of our family. He broke his hind leg chasing a ball I threw one day. But he never got better and we then discovered he had cancer in the joint. By the time we discovered it, amputation wasn't even an option, so we made the tough decision to put him down. I'll never forget the moment as he closed his eyes for the last time. It was such a sad experience for me....but I knew it was the right thing to do.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)So sorry for your loss!
nolabear
(41,991 posts)You're a good owner for taking her all the way to the end and not abandoning her to pain or suffering. Hang in there. It never gets less sad but it gets better as she settles into that place you have in your heart just for her.
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)difficult last night, but we knew that she had to go, otherwise it could have been worst. We wanted the vet who first treated her to send her over the rainbow bridge.
fizzgig
(24,146 posts)i'm sorry for the loss of your friend
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)to bring her up to Canada. My only consolation is that she had a good two years here.
Beautiful dog and am sure she enjoyed her last few years here but that does not diminish how much we will miss her!
All animal loving people on here, it is always nice to see how we interact with each other!
PETRUS
(3,678 posts)The Power of the Dog
There is sorrow enough in the natural way
From men and women to fill our day;
And when we are certain of sorrow in store,
Why do we always arrange for more?
Brothers and sisters, I bid you beware
Of giving your heart to a dog to tear.
Buy a pup and your money will buy
Love unflinching that cannot lie--
Perfect passion and worship fed
By a kick in the ribs or a pat on the head.
Nevertheless it is hardly fair
To risk your heart to a dog to tear.
When the fourteen years which Nature permits
Are closing in asthma, or tumour, or fits,
And the vet's unspoken prescription runs
To lethal chambers or loaded guns,
Then you will find--it's your own affair--
But ... you've given your heart to a dog to tear.
When the body that lived at your single will,
With its whimper of welcome, is stilled (how still!)
When the spirit that answered your every mood
Is gone--wherever it goes--for good,
You will discover how much you care,
And will give your heart to a dog to tear.
We've sorrow enough in the natural way,
When it comes to burying Christian clay.
Our loves are not given, but only lent,
At compound interest of cent per cent.
Though it is not always the case, I believe,
That the longer we've kept 'em, the more do we grieve:
For, when debts are payable, right or wrong,
A short-term loan is as bad as a long--
So why in--Heaven (before we are there)
Should we give our hearts to a dog to tear?
akbacchus_BC
(5,704 posts)eridani
(51,907 posts)Almost always with cats, the end
comes creeping over the two of you
she stops eating, his back legs
no longer support him, she leans
to your hand and purrs but cannot
risesometimes a whimper of pain
although they are stoic. They see
death clearly though hooded eyes.
Then there is the long weepy
trip to the vet, the carrier no
longer necessary, the last time
in your lap. The injection is quick.
Simply they stop breathing
in your arms. You bring them
home to bury in the flower garden,
planting a bush over a deep grave.
That is how I would like to cease,
held in a lovers arms and quickly
fading to black like an old-fashioned
movie embrace. I hate the white
silent scream of hospitals, the whine
of pain like air-conditionings hum.
I want to click the off switch.
And if I can no longer choose
I want someone who loves me
there, not a doctor with forty patients
and his morality to keep me sort
of, kind of alive or sort of undead.
Why are we more rational and kinder
to our pets than to ourselves or our
parents? Death is not the worst
thing; denying it can be.
kimi
(2,441 posts)Yes, any number of us pet lovers have been there, and it is a heartbreaking decision. In the end, it's something that is inevitably what we must decide is the kindest and most loving act for a companion who has been loving and kind to US for so long. That said, it hurts terribly, it will hurt for a long time.
My heart goes out to you. Peace, and safe passage to your girl. Hugs, and take care.
KT2000
(20,587 posts)go ahead and cry your eyes out. They are in our hearts forever and their love is so pure.
It is overwhelming and you will feel better - you did what was best for her.
applegrove
(118,778 posts)my Monster to sleep in July. Was really hard. I have him on my wallpaper on the computer and that helps me. I am still learning from the guy - pets don't stop teaching you stuff just because they are in a better place... vibes to you and your beloved dog.
TorchTheWitch
(11,065 posts)It is so hard, but you did the right thing. The last act of love you could have given her.
I've been through the ordeal twice now. It doesn't get any easier. But would you want it to be? I think how hard we grieve is in proportion to how much we loved them.
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)We had one border collie that died in her sleep after having health problems for years. I spent the night with her after a bad day only to find she had died in her sleep. Another one died less than a year later. She was doing great one day and the next couldn't even hold herself up and her mind was gone so we had to put her to sleep. Fortunately the vet came to the house instead of us having to go to the office. Both were 17 yrs old when they died and we had rescued them when they were just puppies.
The best advice I can give is to start looking for another dog before long. You never forget the ones that came before and it's never the same, but the ones that come after can help you fill the void in ways you can't imagine right now.
hobbit709
(41,694 posts)I've had to do this more times than I want to think about and it never got any easier.
Just be assured that you did the right thing no matter how much it hurts.
NRaleighLiberal
(60,019 posts)hard as it is. We've had to say goodbye to our German Shepherd Heidi, Black Lab Zoe, and cats Walter and Moby, over the years. You will heal, and your memories of wonderful times spent with Nirmala will grow and become wonderful for you to ponder, after a bit of time passes.
I am convinced that the spirits of each of our beloved, departed pets somehow move into our present and future furry family members. That's how it's felt with us - wishing the same for you.
canoeist52
(2,282 posts)They seem to revive a little and wag their tails 'cause they think they're going for a walk - which makes you start to re-think the choice you're making. We were there 2 yrs ago. That last ride with the family was the worst. Hugs to you.
roody
(10,849 posts)It is always a heartbreak.
99Forever
(14,524 posts)... Nakita and Sadie Mae, our 11 year old and 7 months German Shepards, they promise to find Nirmala when they reach the bridge and run and romp and play.
There is something in GSDs eyes that just melt me. I love all dogs, but my Shepards are on a different level. My thoughts and heart go out to you for your loss.
livetohike
(22,163 posts){{ }} It's always so hard.....but try and think of the good memories you have of Nirmala and it will ease the sadness of your decision. I mourn all of the dogs that we have had to make that final trip to the Vet and intellectually I know that it was the best decision.
I still tear up when I think of my dogs and some have been gone for over 30 years. However, I smile and laugh more than cry when I think of the funny things they did and you will too in time.
rurallib
(62,448 posts)But - it opened the door for the son of Beelzebub to move in - we are adjusting
relationships with pets are often unique and long lasting.
Hope you are blessed with good memories.
Stinky The Clown
(67,818 posts)Helping them across the Rainbow Bridge is the kindest and the hardest thing we get to do with them.
I must say, I do get weepy each and every time I read a post about someone losing a pet. The loss of a GSD is especially touching as the gentlest soul I have ever known is GSD.
For you and yours . . . .
dana_b
(11,546 posts)just a virtual
I'm so sorry for your loss.
polly7
(20,582 posts)nirvana555
(448 posts)painful experience. The Rainbow Bridge poem/philosophy has helped me in the past. I believe that your precious one is out of pain and in a very peaceful state. It's healthy to let yourself cry and grieve.
graywarrior
(59,440 posts)Best wishes and hugs to you.
bigwillq
(72,790 posts)hamsterjill
(15,224 posts)It is such a hard decision to know when it's time to let one go when they are ill. You certainly don't want to let them go, at all...but you do not want them to endure suffering either.
Having been faced with this decision MANY times, and knowing that no matter how many times I face it, it is never easy - - - the only conclusion that I've come to is that we know our pets better than anyone else, and we somehow just "know" when the time comes.
Thank you ever so much for caring for Nirmala and giving her love and a safe and forever home. I know that she loved you back, and appreciated you - even appreciated your unselfish act of letting her go so that she did not suffer. She was so lucky to have had you!
Now, I know the timing isn't right for you yet, of course, but when some time has passed and you are ready to think of allowing another furr-child into your heart, please run, don't walk, to your nearest rescue organization and let another kiddo benefit from the love and safety you are able to give. People like you are "GOLD" to people like me who work in rescue because good homes are so hard to find.
I wish you peace and comfort.
Arugula Latte
(50,566 posts)We always say that the only good thing about losing one of our kitties is that it opens up a space so we can give another furry family member a home. There is so much need out there and so many animals that need help.
Tikki
(14,559 posts)Last edited Fri Jan 13, 2012, 03:17 PM - Edit history (1)
Hugs to your family as you share this loss...and know she knew
she was loved unconditionally.
The Tikkis
Swede
(33,282 posts)We outlive them.
madmom
(9,681 posts)10 years ago, I still miss him terribly. I haven't been able to bring myself to get another pet yet. We do have my daughters cat and that helps, but my heart still hurts to think of him.
RebelOne
(30,947 posts)I had to put down my almost 13-year-old Rottweiler in July of 2010. And it was the hardest thing I ever in my life had to do. She had tumors on her liver and also bone cancer. None of the pain meds were working any longer, and it got so that she could barely walk. So I had to make that fatal decision because I could not stand to see her in pain.
My heart goes out to you. It is so sad to lose a member of your family.
hedgehog
(36,286 posts)trueblue2007
(17,238 posts)IT WAS SOOOOOOOOOOOO SAD. i still can't believe my African American Queen is not here. Soph was the best cat in the world
Akbacchus, there are no words for me to say. I am sooooooo sorry and I pray you will not suffer in grief so bad. Tears coming down. German Shepherds are gorgeous dogs and I'm sorry for you loss.
She will be in Doggie Heaven.... running after friesbies.
GoCubsGo
(32,089 posts)I had to put my kitty to sleep back in May. He was nearly 17 and had chronic renal failure. It was not fun, but I am glad I did it. His quality of life was very poor at that point. I miss him.
:hugs:
a kennedy
(29,707 posts)hardest thing to do, I still miss her so bad.........