The DU Lounge
Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsDad Jokes.
Once upon a time, I use to be a Cafeteria Assistant at a public school. I would tell my lunchtime students jokes every Friday.
I came across some of the jokes that I would share with them. If you don't like what you see, keep scrolling. There's absolutely no reason to be rude. Thank you.
Q: Why did the turtle cross the road?
A: To get to the shell station
---------------------------------------------------------
Q:Why do crows sit on telephone wires?
A: So that they can make long distance caws.
---------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why can't the bicycle stand by itself?
A: Because it's two tired!
--------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why did grandma put wheels on her rocking chair?
A: So she could rock and roll.
--------------------------------------------------------
Q: Why did the man run around his bed?
A: He wanted to catch up on his sleep.
yankee87
(2,175 posts)They are good.
TlalocW
(15,391 posts)Why didn't Han Solo enjoy his steak?
It was Chewie.
LW1977
(1,236 posts)Force of habit
BoomaofBandM
(1,772 posts)A nice tradition my husband is glad to embrace as a grandpa.
True Dough
(17,320 posts)A man walks into a psychiatrist's office wearing nothing but plastic wrap. Psychiatrist looks at him and says:
"Well clearly I can see your nuts."
LuckyCharms
(17,458 posts)Last edited Sun Oct 1, 2023, 05:17 PM - Edit history (1)
Bartender says: "You have a steering wheel attached to you".
Pirate says: "Aye, it's drivin' me nuts".
True Dough
(17,320 posts)a 360-degree turn!
Niagara
(7,659 posts)LuckyCharms
(17,458 posts)Hands at 10:00 and 2:00 on the steering wheel.
Niagara
(7,659 posts)Hands at 10:00 and 2:00.
Sometimes I can't help it. Today I'm feeling extra saucy.
LuckyCharms
(17,458 posts)"Saucy".
Niagara
(7,659 posts)Saucy.
My favorite words usually begin with S.
Shenanigans
Smorgasbord
Sable
Saucy
Savory
LuckyCharms
(17,458 posts)I tend to take things too far.
Niagara
(7,659 posts)You're still the life of the party here.
Niagara
(7,659 posts)TexasBushwhacker
(20,214 posts)Pretty nuts, eh?
kimbutgar
(21,188 posts)The only one I have is.
How do fish save their money?
..at a river bank
Niagara
(7,659 posts)I like that.
It's definitely a keeper!
kimbutgar
(21,188 posts)Telling me jokes. That was my favorite one!
Marthe48
(17,018 posts)Because if they see a vehicle coming, they yell "Caw! Caw!"
North Shore Chicago
(3,326 posts)Marthe48
(17,018 posts)Because the sea weed
One of my grandkids' favorites
TlalocW
(15,391 posts)What's black and white, and it if falls out of a tree on to you, it will kill you?
A piano.
What's green and has wheels?
Grass. I lied about the wheels.
Why did the dog cross the road?
It was stapled to the chicken.
qwlauren35
(6,150 posts)Those were awesome!
Niagara
(7,659 posts)Answer: Hot Wheels
I always made sure to tell the kindergarten class and 1st graders not to actually put toys in the microwave.
kairos12
(12,872 posts)Because it was hungry.
Niagara
(7,659 posts)Because 7 ate 9 (7, 8, 9).