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oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:42 PM Jun 2020

Anybody choosing to stop coloring their hair?

There are groups on Facebook and other websites to help and encourage women through this process. We’ve been brainwashed into thinking that women are old, haggard and no longer taking care of ourselves if we don’t cover up the greys, while men are considered silver foxes. I’ve read so many posts from women who have been told rude things from their partners and close family members and even from complete strangers. My good friend decided to go back to coloring because she couldn’t take the negativity anymore.

Last coloring for me was in December. It’s one of the most freeing decisions I’ve made. The awkward first few months of growth was easy with having to stay home anyway. Now, over six months in, I’m enjoying my silvers!

64 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
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Anybody choosing to stop coloring their hair? (Original Post) oregonjen Jun 2020 OP
What's "hair"? NT mahatmakanejeeves Jun 2020 #1
Ha! My husband is right there with you! oregonjen Jun 2020 #5
No, but I color half as often now, because who's gonna be looking at me? If I wore my hair tblue37 Jun 2020 #2
I made that decision years ago and I've never looked back. I would Raven Jun 2020 #3
Right? My scalp always itched intensely after. oregonjen Jun 2020 #4
I stopped too, because I had a lesion on my scalp and didn't want to make it worse yellowdogintexas Jun 2020 #40
Yes Sanity Claws Jun 2020 #6
When I decided to let mine grow out leftieNanner Jun 2020 #9
I'm white in the front and more pewter in the back oregonjen Jun 2020 #10
I quit dyeing my hair a few years ago... WestLosAngelesGal Jun 2020 #7
I'm in my 70s and female. TruckFump Jun 2020 #8
I agree with you leftieNanner Jun 2020 #12
Yes! I look at my pics and realized that my complexion looks better now with my natural silvers oregonjen Jun 2020 #18
I know what you mean! TruckFump Jun 2020 #56
I last colored in February (semi permanent). I have a skunk stripe of white BusyBeingBest Jun 2020 #11
If you are conflicted, grow it out some more and see oregonjen Jun 2020 #14
I think I'll let it go for now, at least until August, BusyBeingBest Jun 2020 #20
I totally understand oregonjen Jun 2020 #21
When my roots grew out leftieNanner Jun 2020 #23
That's an idea if I decide to stop, my grays are white too. BusyBeingBest Jun 2020 #27
In 90s a colleague stopped. She got so many compliments she never started back up! bobbieinok Jun 2020 #13
Fuck no! Glamrock Jun 2020 #15
Silver fox? Midnightwalk Jun 2020 #16
LOL!! oregonjen Jun 2020 #19
I haven't colored my hair in years but I have been wanting Doreen Jun 2020 #17
That's something I never started because I'm too lazy to keep up with the roots. Arkansas Granny Jun 2020 #22
Did for a while. Started again end of May. louis-t Jun 2020 #24
I stopped 2.5 years ago leftieNanner Jun 2020 #25
I quit years ago. GreenPartyVoter Jun 2020 #26
Beautiful! oregonjen Jun 2020 #28
Thanks! I had a new bathroom I didn't want stained, and a white line at my forehead every GreenPartyVoter Jun 2020 #34
Very pretty ! Dream Girl Jun 2020 #30
Thanks! GreenPartyVoter Jun 2020 #35
Man, did you luck out! Jirel Jun 2020 #38
There's a secret trick to it. GreenPartyVoter Jun 2020 #39
Yes! I haven't used blue or purple shampoo yet, though. oregonjen Jun 2020 #41
It's fabulous, and that's a good brand sold almost everywhere. GreenPartyVoter Jun 2020 #44
my wife stopped about 5 years ago. She is simply gorgeous, all silver NRaleighLiberal Jun 2020 #29
This message was self-deleted by its author Dream Girl Jun 2020 #32
Aww..so sweet! Dream Girl Jun 2020 #33
Exactly! Here's to you both, many more years of bliss! oregonjen Jun 2020 #37
I decided to let my hair grow long, turn white or grey, whatever! I've always wanted cornball 24 Jun 2020 #31
Nah, I'm doing it. Jirel Jun 2020 #36
HA! Skittles Jun 2020 #42
Lucky! oregonjen Jun 2020 #43
same here Kali Jun 2020 #63
When I hit 50, I was having a hard time getting a job. bif Jun 2020 #45
The chemicals are nasty and quite toxic. oregonjen Jun 2020 #48
We all grow old TristanIsolde Jun 2020 #46
I did on January...three of my best friends did the same thing. Freedomofspeech Jun 2020 #47
Right on!! oregonjen Jun 2020 #49
At almost 50 I don't have grays stopwastingmymoney Jun 2020 #50
I decided when my eyebrows starting graying it was time to stop dying my hair. blueinredohio Jun 2020 #51
My solution: Dye eyebrows..LOL LeftInTX Jun 2020 #52
Love my grey hair..."You won't know (how it's ultimately going to look) until you let it go". Tikki Jun 2020 #53
I've wanted to do it for awhile - at some point having hair that isn't gray The Velveteen Ocelot Jun 2020 #54
I stopped, but I thought it looked good, but my scalp is looking dull LeftInTX Jun 2020 #55
GreenPartyVoter upthread linked to a good purple shampoo to help brighten hair oregonjen Jun 2020 #61
Here is a fascinating before-and-after video of older women going from dyed hair & roots... ailsagirl Jun 2020 #57
Really pretty and fun to watch oregonjen Jun 2020 #59
Not yet. I started going gray when I was 25 so I've been coloring my hair for decades. catbyte Jun 2020 #58
Good grief, they need to tell those rude people fuck right off. Lars39 Jun 2020 #60
never... handmade34 Jun 2020 #62
I lost my hair to cancer treatment a couple of years ago, Habibi Jun 2020 #64

tblue37

(65,490 posts)
2. No, but I color half as often now, because who's gonna be looking at me? If I wore my hair
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:44 PM
Jun 2020

short I'd stop, but my hair grows too fast.

Raven

(13,902 posts)
3. I made that decision years ago and I've never looked back. I would
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:44 PM
Jun 2020

always get a pounding headache after sitting with that goop on my head.

yellowdogintexas

(22,277 posts)
40. I stopped too, because I had a lesion on my scalp and didn't want to make it worse
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:30 PM
Jun 2020

The woman who cut my hair told me I should let it grow out completely; she thought I was going to really like it & I could always recolor it if I didn't.

So I did let it grow out, and she was right, I do love it!!! I miss my dark hair but now I look like I paid big money to have it frosted. Since I have a short pixie cut the color mix is really interesting.

This was maybe 14 years ago. I only started coloring it to begin with because my formerly very dark brown hair was fading to this icky mouse color.

Oh yes, the lesion went away eventually so it's all good

Sanity Claws

(21,857 posts)
6. Yes
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:47 PM
Jun 2020

This seems to be an ideal time to transition to gray. As soon as the salons reopen, I plan to get a cut but not to dye the roots. I already have 3 to 4 months of grow out. That was the hard part.
BTW, how gray are you? Haw drastic will the change be?

leftieNanner

(15,173 posts)
9. When I decided to let mine grow out
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:55 PM
Jun 2020

I still had 6-7" of dyed hair left. I went to Sally's Beauty Supply and bought some bleach. Died the still brown stuff and then let it all grow out white.

That was 2.5 years ago. No regrets.

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
10. I'm white in the front and more pewter in the back
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:56 PM
Jun 2020

I’ve seen pictures of beautiful white hair all over, but that isn’t me. I’m so happy I made the decision to stop putting harsh chemicals on my scalp.

WestLosAngelesGal

(268 posts)
7. I quit dyeing my hair a few years ago...
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:50 PM
Jun 2020

...after reading an article about Jamie Lee Curtis in AARP. I have never loved my hair so much as I do now.

TruckFump

(5,812 posts)
8. I'm in my 70s and female.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:55 PM
Jun 2020

I have not colored my hair for years. I have just a small amount of gray around my face. I love my gray hair. I tried coloring it for a few years when I was in my mid 60s. It looks and feels better and is healthier when not colored.

leftieNanner

(15,173 posts)
12. I agree with you
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:56 PM
Jun 2020

Plus as our complexion changes, it looks better with natural hair than dyed. I'm embracing the white hair!

It makes me smile that young women have been dying their hair gray to be stylish.

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
18. Yes! I look at my pics and realized that my complexion looks better now with my natural silvers
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:03 PM
Jun 2020

shining through.

BusyBeingBest

(8,059 posts)
11. I last colored in February (semi permanent). I have a skunk stripe of white
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:56 PM
Jun 2020

on top of my head that's getting more obvious by the day, along with graying temples. Have dark blonde/light brown longish hair that needs a trim desperately--not looking real good at the moment. Thank god for ponytails. I would like to quit, but it feels like I'm giving up trying to look good. My husband swears he wouldn't be bothered by it, but I suspect he'd rather I keep it up. Don't know what I'm going to do.

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
14. If you are conflicted, grow it out some more and see
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:58 PM
Jun 2020

You can always color again if you don’t like it. It sounds funny, but there are support groups to help with this transition. Join them and see what you think!

BusyBeingBest

(8,059 posts)
20. I think I'll let it go for now, at least until August,
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:05 PM
Jun 2020

which will be the six-month mark, and reassess then. I think my own psychological discomfort of watching those roots increasingly coming in white is the biggest challenge for me, not negativity from anyone I know (except my mom, who thinks I should color until I'm 80 LOL).

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
21. I totally understand
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:08 PM
Jun 2020

I’m a bit past the six month mark and it’s been nice to slowly say goodbye to my dyed hair. The color has faded a bit, though. It’s a nice way to transition, especially because I’m not going anywhere.

leftieNanner

(15,173 posts)
23. When my roots grew out
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:10 PM
Jun 2020

And I decided to stop coloring my hair. I had the long hunk of still sorta brown stuff to deal with. I went to the Beauty Supply store and got some powdered bleach. They told me how to use it. Then I bleached out all of the remaining color. It worked because my new growing in hair was mostly white (not a steel or pewter color). Don't know whether that would work for you or not.

bobbieinok

(12,858 posts)
13. In 90s a colleague stopped. She got so many compliments she never started back up!
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 05:57 PM
Jun 2020

Her hairdresser suggested she try it IIRC. (He's really good!)

Glamrock

(11,802 posts)
15. Fuck no!
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:02 PM
Jun 2020

I’m gonna be 50 next year! I’m so doing the Ronald Reagan thing. But, truth be told, I am one very vain individual.....

Midnightwalk

(3,131 posts)
16. Silver fox?
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:02 PM
Jun 2020

Let me go ask my wife. Wait a second.....

































She spit her drink all over the cat and they are both mad at me. Thanks a lot OJ!

Doreen

(11,686 posts)
17. I haven't colored my hair in years but I have been wanting
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:03 PM
Jun 2020

to do highlights. I hate it that were my grey hair is coming in looks like those grey hair that's on the bride of Frankenstien. At least I could look like the bride of Frankenstien with some nice color.

Arkansas Granny

(31,534 posts)
22. That's something I never started because I'm too lazy to keep up with the roots.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:09 PM
Jun 2020

Over the years my hair has lightened somewhat, but I'm still blond.

leftieNanner

(15,173 posts)
25. I stopped 2.5 years ago
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:14 PM
Jun 2020

Realized that my roots were growing in white, bleached out the bottom part of the previously dyed hair, and moved on. Love my silver hair! Plus it's healthier without the toxic dye stuff.

GreenPartyVoter

(72,381 posts)
34. Thanks! I had a new bathroom I didn't want stained, and a white line at my forehead every
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:22 PM
Jun 2020

2 weeks, so I decided that grey is lovely indeed!

NRaleighLiberal

(60,024 posts)
29. my wife stopped about 5 years ago. She is simply gorgeous, all silver
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:18 PM
Jun 2020

and soft grays. Reminds me of Emmy Lou Harris. At 63, she still makes this 64 year old's heart stop. We are at 40 years of bliss!

We don't care about hair color, clothes, etc...the essence of life is to enjoy our time, our experiences. The rest...the "stuff"...the vanity is a waste of time and money.

as for me? just happy with the little I have. Mostly in the garden or out hiking, so well hatted!

Response to NRaleighLiberal (Reply #29)

cornball 24

(1,481 posts)
31. I decided to let my hair grow long, turn white or grey, whatever! I've always wanted
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:22 PM
Jun 2020

to be an old hippie chick so I guess it's now or never.

Jirel

(2,025 posts)
36. Nah, I'm doing it.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:23 PM
Jun 2020

I almost always do it myself, anyway.

Gray hair looks great on some men and women, and awful on others. My husband was going white before age 30. At 50, he is almost full white, and it’s gorgeous. I just made him trim off the last of the dark hair.

Me, I can’t stand my gray. If everything started to go, I’d reconsider. But thin white streaks? No thanks. Worse yet, my natural color is near black. Nope, my hair will stay a nice, maintained auburn unless the white pops everywhere.

Skittles

(153,208 posts)
42. HA!
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:33 PM
Jun 2020

I heard from some folk that they'd finally see my "real" hair color - I have never colored my hair, it has always been blonde

Kali

(55,025 posts)
63. same here
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 09:05 PM
Jun 2020

though it has gotten darker on its own, I do get random white hairs but they are just amusing to me.

never colored it in my life and haven't cut it in nearly 40 years,

bif

(22,764 posts)
45. When I hit 50, I was having a hard time getting a job.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:42 PM
Jun 2020

I'm an advertising copywriter, and like most people in the field, there are stretches of unemployment. My dad suggested I color my hair--he thought maybe I wasn't getting hired because people thought I looked too old. Well, I ended up coloring my hair for the last 15 years. After I got laid off from a job last year I said "Screw it", and quit coloring it. I let it grow out and grew a mustache and beard. Almost all grey. Best decision I've made in ages. I got so sick of using those nasty chemicals.

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
48. The chemicals are nasty and quite toxic.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:48 PM
Jun 2020

Ageism is very real. Isn’t nice to realize it’s okay to be grey?

TristanIsolde

(272 posts)
46. We all grow old
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:43 PM
Jun 2020

Let's just let nature take its course and age gracefully I say. And about the opinions of others... fuck that and fuck them, I don't give a damn what others think

Freedomofspeech

(4,228 posts)
47. I did on January...three of my best friends did the same thing.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:43 PM
Jun 2020

Could not have done it at a better time. Everyone loves it, especially my husband. Right now it's like 50 shades of grey. I will never dye my hair again. Plus saving tons of money, another plus.

stopwastingmymoney

(2,042 posts)
50. At almost 50 I don't have grays
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 06:50 PM
Jun 2020

I was a blond child and have done highlights since I was a teenager

I’m weird that my hair has become darker in my recent hormonal upheaval years

I have better than two inches of root but it doesn’t yet bother me enough to actually go to the salon just yet

I will go back though, I just don’t feel like myself if my hair is too dark

Tikki

(14,560 posts)
53. Love my grey hair..."You won't know (how it's ultimately going to look) until you let it go".
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:08 PM
Jun 2020

Tikki

The Velveteen Ocelot

(115,877 posts)
54. I've wanted to do it for awhile - at some point having hair that isn't gray
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:10 PM
Jun 2020

when you have an old-ish face just makes one look even older and a bit pathetic - but I didn't want to go around with several inches of gray roots while it grew out. The lockdown was a perfect opportunity because I'm not going anywhere and probably won't for awhile. By the time it's safe to go out I figure all or most of it will be gray and I won't have to deal with that awkward transition.

LeftInTX

(25,588 posts)
55. I stopped, but I thought it looked good, but my scalp is looking dull
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:11 PM
Jun 2020

I haven't dyed it since January.

Pictures taken today



oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
61. GreenPartyVoter upthread linked to a good purple shampoo to help brighten hair
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:39 PM
Jun 2020

That might be a way to help you feel better about your hair?

ailsagirl

(22,899 posts)
57. Here is a fascinating before-and-after video of older women going from dyed hair & roots...
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:25 PM
Jun 2020

to gorgeous silver manes.

Love the hairstyles!

oregonjen

(3,341 posts)
59. Really pretty and fun to watch
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:36 PM
Jun 2020

Although, it’s still spending a lot of money, hours in the chair and lots of chemicals on the scalp. Jack Martin charges thousands of dollars for those styles. Intense bleaching to achieve those looks can be very damaging to your hair if not done correctly, but if you want the transition to be over and done with, it’s definitely a gorgeous option!

catbyte

(34,467 posts)
58. Not yet. I started going gray when I was 25 so I've been coloring my hair for decades.
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 07:33 PM
Jun 2020

Being Ojibwe, my natural hair color is dark brown, so going gray is not something I can transition to gracefully. My hair is between chin and shoulder-length, so either I would have to practically shave my head or look like Cruella De Vil for months on end. Maybe I'll stop in 10 years or so, but not yet.

handmade34

(22,758 posts)
62. never...
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 08:58 PM
Jun 2020

I WANT Gray or silver or... I am destined to naturally have brown hair forever... so I color it!!




Habibi

(3,598 posts)
64. I lost my hair to cancer treatment a couple of years ago,
Fri Jun 12, 2020, 09:34 PM
Jun 2020

and when it grew back, I decided not to start coloring it again. Too expensive, and I may very well lose it again anyway. I love my silver/gray now, though I confess I do miss being a redhead some days.

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