Bonehead BIL wants to do family Mother's Day as usual...

[Phentex]

He claims this idea is my mother-in-law's idea. He sent out a text saying MIL was lonely and ready for company. We haven't responded yet. Only one other sibling has said yes she thinks it's a great idea.

My husband is going to call my mother-in-law later and talk with her about it. We have no intention of going and we don't want her being exposed to 20+ other people either. Still, this is something she has to decide for herself.

I just don't get it.

edited for spelling

[enough]

1. People seem to think it's like a diet, and it's OK to relax for a special occasion.

It’s like “I’ve been so good for so long, it’s OK to cheat for one day.”

[Phentex]

4. Yep...

I can't grasp how they think this is a good idea.

[SWBTATTReg]

2. If I were you, I'd ignore their calls. Do they not watch the news? Maybe print up some of the...

many stories of all of those who made fun of the CV at first, and now are DEAD!

You're smart, stay away.

What a sob story. Pathetic. BIL says MIL is lonely.

Tough crap, grow up. Everybody is in the same boat. They just want people to feel sorry for them, all while putting others in harms' way.

I dropped all such family members out of my life years ago, and thank god I did. I am so much happier.

[Phentex]

6. Oh they watch the news...

Fox News I'm sure. We tolerate them on a good day. After my MIL dies, we won't see this brother and family for a long time, if ever. Luckily, there are other family members that make getting together fun. Just not during quarantine.

[Phoenix61]

3. "I always use a condom"

Except for that one night stand one time, we’ll, maybe two times. It’ll be ok, right?

[Phentex]

7. It makes no sense...

however, the only reason my MIL stopped getting her hair done and going to church was because they closed. So I'm not sure where her head is either.

[Harker]

5. While some have self discipline, and leave the house rarely...

others are having house parties.

It's especially regrettable that the partygoers can kill the cautious ones with one touch.

Yes, I'm concerned for the unconcerned, also.

[Phentex]

9. I don't wish them harm...

but I really want to protect my MIL. This doesn't sound like something that would be her idea. My husband just talked to her a couple of nights ago and she said nothing about it.

[Harker]

13. Perhaps if you reason with her...

maybe find some way to transform it into a safe-distance gathering (or non-gathering), you'll be doing everyone a great service and protect them all.

Is there a potential collaborator somewhere? You probably have some concern about being the wet blanket, but it's important enough to stand up for, I believe.

[Phentex]

14. My husband just told me...

he spoke to another brother and they are both going to talk to MIL tonight and explain again how unsafe this would be.

[Harker]

15. That's good to hear.

I hope all stay well.

[58Sunliner]

8. At first it's frustrating, then it enrages me that people are dropping their guard.

[Phentex]

10. I thought he was going to suggest a Zoom meeting...

wasn't expecting an actual get together.

He's probably gone bowling already.

[58Sunliner]

16. LOL. Makes you wonder where else he socializes.

[IggleDuer]

11. Perhaps arrange a drive by parade.

...or a FaceTime or Skype event to talk and see the grand kinds.

[Phentex]

12. We Facetime now...

that's something she's been doing for a long time, even before quarantine. It's comical sometimes.

I do think a family online event would be fun.

[Iggo]

17. My 89 year old dad (who lives with us) wants to bring in the mail every day.

We tell him he's not allowed to do that, and the only decision he gets to make is whether or not he's gonna be butthurt about it.

[RobinA]

18. Put Yourself

in his place for a minute.

[Iggo]

19. I have. A million times. Over 58 years. Doesn't change anything.

He’s still not allowed to handle the mail til after it’s sat for a day or two in the purgatory box.

I’d rather have him alive and pist.

[SWBTATTReg]

20. My dad (he's gone now) would walk out to the freestanding mail box to pick up the mail (they were...

on a 2-lane county road behind a state park, so anything happening was exciting. My dad would walk (it's about a 750 foot walk each way to the mail box and back to the house) there w/ an entourage of characters, the dog, the cat, the turkeys he raised, etc. and they would all walk in a single file line to the mail box and back.

It was a ritual and he literally went nuts if the mail was late (my dad)...I was amazed at how he reacted to the mail being late a little ... he was really 'into it'.

Perhaps a suggestion, grab the mail for a few days or have it held, and then clean it yourselves, prior to putting the grabbed and cleaned mail back into the mailbox...maybe you have another mailbox you can forward the mail, and then clean it, prior to you picking up the cleaned mail and putting it into the mailbox for your dad's pleasure.

Knowing that your dad is 89, perhaps it still hasn't sunk in of the dangers of CV yet (or you haven't told him, to protect him). I don't blame you for being paranoid. I'd be too, if my father was still here (and he didn't listen really either). Be safe all of you and thanks for sharing your story.