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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsKnow any Zen Buddhist jokes?
Last edited Mon Sep 30, 2019, 06:30 PM - Edit history (3)
3 Zen monks go into a cave to meditate.
After a month or so, a noise is heard outside the cave.
3 months later, one of the monks says:
"Did anyone else hear that noise?..I think it was a cow"
6 months later, the 2nd monk replies: "That wasn't a cow, it was a goat!"
A year later, the 3rd monk says: "If you two are going to keep arguing, I'm leaving!"
Unbelievable
(84 posts)Why did the Buddhist Monks business fail.
He was selling nothing.
OilemFirchen
(7,143 posts)A man entering a monastery takes a vow of silence. He is allowed, each year on the anniversary of his entry, to say two words.
After the first year, he meets with the head monk. "Food stinks," he says, then returns to his room.
After the second year he states "bed's hard".
The third year he proclaims "I quit". The head monk responds "I'm not surprised. All you've ever done is complain."
On edit: RandiFan1290 beat me by two minutes. But he/she cheated.
RandiFan1290
(6,245 posts)There once was a monastery that was very strict. Following a vow of silence, no one was allowed to speak at all. But there was one exception to this rule. Every ten years, the monks were permitted to speak just two words. After spending his first ten years at the monastery, one monk went to the head monk. "It has been ten years," said the head monk. "What are the two words you would like to speak?"
"Bed... hard..." said the monk.
"I see," replied the head monk.
Ten years later, the monk returned to the head monk's office. "It has been ten more years," said the head monk. "What are the two words you would like to speak?"
"Food... stinks..." said the monk.
"I see," replied the head monk.
Yet another ten years passed and the monk once again met with the head monk who asked, "What are your two words now, after these ten years?"
"I... quit!" said the monk.
"Well, I can see why," replied the head monk. "All you ever do is complain."
red dog 1
(27,866 posts)Itchinjim
(3,085 posts)CanisCrocinus
(109 posts)vacuum their couch cushions?
Because they have no attachments.
red dog 1
(27,866 posts)When the master opened the box, he found that there was nothing inside.
"Aha," he exclaimed. "Just what I wanted!"
red dog 1
(27,866 posts)"I know you're out there.. I can concentrate on your breathing!"
red dog 1
(27,866 posts)Upon which the pupil replies: "To whom are you telling that?"
red dog 1
(27,866 posts)jpak
(41,760 posts)and then
Nothing
Brother Buzz
(36,469 posts)Doc_Technical
(3,527 posts)he gives the hot dog vendor a $10 bill and the vendor ignores the monk.
After a minute the monk asks for his change.
Then vendor then says to the monk, "Real change comes from within."