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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsI'm happy with my life.
It's funny, I'm a heterosexual male, and I've never been married.
And in December I'm going to be 60. Oh yeah!
I do have two companions, 2 cats.
I was engaged decades ago, to two women. Both engagements fell apart, but I still am/was good friends with both.
(One died 2 years ago)
I'm content, I have the things I want, and I am friends with 2 guys who are like me, in their 60's and never married.
I had a great-uncle who lived to the age of 95, and he never got married.
Would I want a girlfriend now? Maybe.
Would I want to marry? Nope.
applegrove
(118,696 posts)have different roles to play than have a family or find love.
PoindexterOglethorpe
(25,862 posts)Being happy with your life is wonderful. It's not about being married or having children. It's about being happy.
dawg day
(7,947 posts)But I want to live long enough not just to see Trump OUT--
but my beloved country recovered from his desecrations.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)I like doing things when I want, how I want, without having to check with anyone - I'll take that any day over "compromising"
😍
✌🏼
I had a hard time getting past the part where you had to be with someone for the rest of your life.....much too heavy for me
you say my dear, is alright
👍🏻😍❤️🙏🏻😎
by me
✌🏼
I can tell YOU are married
been there, done that ... twice 😳
no 3 time loser, me
✌🏼
sorry - but hey, don't think of yourself as a loser......a loser is someone who quits trying.....I hope you are back in the game - heh, try to find someone like me, who is happy just dating
dweller
(23,641 posts)😍
ok by me, i adore strong women, and probably need my ass kicked
on occasion 😜
but yeh, tried that... went in with not looking for marriage, just the company
and good fun... and i'm a loyal honest guy... last time she agreed and about a year into it, said wanted marriage 😑
so split and back together shortly and it was rinse and repeat ...
so i gave up... find that woman don't find me elegible any longer, and i've
settled into solitude, work some, read a lot, and enjoy my kids and their new families immensely ... 3 ❤️❤️❤️ beautiful grandkids to spoil 😀
life is good 😎
✌🏼
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)fear of sounding selfish. But there it is. I just like doing what I want, when I want. Or not doing what anyone else wants me to. I really just love my freedom and alone time. I'm very happy this way, although I would like to have a travel/dinner companion. I just don't want to have to live with them.
FoxNewsSucks
(10,434 posts)I got used to doing things how I like.
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)Skittles
(153,169 posts)it's not that I don't like someone's company, I just don't want it ALL THE TIME
Rorey
(8,445 posts)I got legally separated almost six months ago and the divorce is final in a couple of weeks. I am going to try to take a vacation by myself and see how it goes. I think it'll be good. I'm really looking forward to some solitude.
What I do know is that I'm never going to marry again under any circumstances. I realized that I've never lived by myself, and I'm so looking forward to it. Right now my son and his family are staying at my house while they build one, but it should be done in the next couple of months. I love them with all my heart, but I just want to do my own thing now.
Skittles
(153,169 posts)and EVERYONE should learn to enjoy their own company......yes indeed
Rorey
(8,445 posts)But I've never taken an actual pleasure trip by myself. I just keep telling myself to be brave. The first step will be the hardest, I know.
kag
(4,079 posts)You posted this on my hubby's and my 28th anniversary. We are happy together. Content. Two kids in college. Wouldn't have it any other way.
There's something to be said for contentment, in whatever form.
By now, husband and I have enough years together that I have to stop and do math to figure out how many years since we married. Two kids out in their own and doing alright and not fully independent. We had 13 years alone together before they happened. We all live in different states now.
And its okay. Contentment here too. Weve come full-circle. Its back to being just the two of us again. And Im liking it! No obligations to anybody but our animals now, and visits every so often.
Weird though. When you spend so much of your life putting the kids needs and interests first, and then that phase is finally over, its a little weird. But Im liking it! Its back to what WE want now. And I feel totally fine about that! Hell, I gave up a career I loved to do right by them. So now that I can prioritize myself and just the two of us again, Im liking it! Still lots to do, too. Not just sitting around gettin old. And I feel very clean about this. I feel like Ive earned it.
canetoad
(17,169 posts)65 soon. Feeling pretty contented.
In two weeks I'll be 65. It used to sound so old, but I still feel pretty darn good, and I'm also content for the most part.
B Stieg
(2,410 posts)But I'll hit 60 in October.
I'm just going to ignore it.
LittleGirl
(8,287 posts)I'll be 60 on the 23rd. It's a big freaking deal to me.
I lost my baby brother in March, he was 57. sniff. My oldest brother I lost on 9/7/18. My poor Mother is really sad and will turn 87 next month.
I never celebrated my birthdays as a child because there were 5 of us. I'm celebrating each one as best I can.
Fla Dem
(23,691 posts)I don't know how close you were to them, but regardless, just to know they're both no longer here is hard to grasp. Feel sorry for your Mom.
LittleGirl
(8,287 posts)Mom will never recover. She cant even talk about him. My baby brother and I were close and he was Moms favorite. Dad died in 75 so this the first year to relive that loss too. My oldest brother left the house when I was 11, so not close.
Oldest and youngest boys gone within 7 months. I see and hear them in my dreams sometimes.
handmade34
(22,756 posts)CTyankee
(63,912 posts)my take on marriage is my own: "I want to die in his arms."
femmocrat
(28,394 posts)But he met an old girlfriend at his class reunion, and the rest is history!
Im hoping my oldest son isnt following in his footsteps.
The Velveteen Ocelot
(115,735 posts)Divorced years ago but still friends with the ex, might tolerate a casual boyfriend (not that I'd find one at my age anyhow), but I have no interest in remarrying or living with somebody other than my three cats. I'm retired, not rich but managing well enough to be able to enjoy a few hobbies and simple pleasures. I like being able to do what I want when I want to do it, leave a mess in the house until I feel like cleaning up, staying up late or sleeping in, and not dealing with other people's issues. Marriage isn't for everyone, and being single isn't something to be dreaded.
Rorey
(8,445 posts)I've been married three times. I was just too young the first time and it was short-lived. My second husband died 27 years ago, and I still miss him. I married again, against my better judgement, and stuck it out for almost 20 years even though the last decade really wasn't very good. Thankfully he decided to have an affair and I found out about it, so I had an "out". I'm really not a quitter, so I would have continued on "til death do us part" and would have been kind of miserable the whole time.
I'm finally free. The divorce is actually final two weeks from tomorrow. I'm going to sell our wedding rings and buy myself a treat. I'm finally free, and I love it.
Clash City Rocker
(3,396 posts)Everyone is different. Im married, but I was single until I was 50. If youre doing what makes you happy, good. Everyone is different. Theres no reason to fit us all in the same box.
N_E_1 for Tennis
(9,737 posts)Just gonna say Im very happy in my life too.
Married to my best friend since 1973...known each other since I was 16-her- 15
She;
loves sports probably more than I.
Holds her own place in a kayak race against the wind.
Beat me in a few tennis matches...(in my youth I held a few regional championships), still ok.
Loves science fiction
Just loves to argue...sharpens critical thinking
Loves to masturbate.
Gets greasy hands fixing shit.
Doesnt mind tasting raw food from the garden offered with muddy fingers.
Still is ahead in hikes uphill.
And anchor in my life, a friend beyond compare...I am such a lucky man.
Rorey
(8,445 posts)My ex-husband told me once that I wasn't his friend. I was devastated because I considered him to be my best friend. I think when he said that it was a big wake-up call for me.
It sounds like you're with exactly who you should be with, and I'm so happy for you.
Comatose Sphagetti
(836 posts)Don't know if I could do it, though.
I know me... I'm selfish and self-absorbed. Having someone to love and care for dampens those flaws by taking me out of myself and giving me a reason/need to practice those qualities of humility, empathy and patience on a daily basis.
I guess you don't need a life partner to work on those qualities, but for me it's nice coming home to someone who awaits my arrival and cares deeply about me. It's wonderful to feel the touch of a beloved partner, and to reciprocate in kind.
Dagstead Bumwood
(3,642 posts)But, much sadder to my thinking would be being married to someone you no longer loved. Trapped in this construct because of the kids, or whatever.
If you're happy with your own company, and that of your cats, then you are lucky, my friend.
Rorey
(8,445 posts)I had to come to the realization that I loved the person I wanted my husband to be, instead of accepting that he wasn't that person. It was actually very liberating to finally realize that.