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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsCliffordu update 6/25
Last edited Mon Jun 25, 2018, 11:19 PM - Edit history (5)
6/25
Cliffordu continues to battle heroically against a most virulent form of ALS. He is still in ICU and is awaiting transfer to a facility that can accommodate close monitoring of his respirator, which now replaces his diaphragm for breathing and the stomach intake tube.
He doesn't feel any pain but he has lost almost all ability to move any muscle.
I am in contact with his ex brother in law who tells me he still has visitors, still is up beat but understands he is on "house time" as he put it. His BIL told me that he was down to moving just his wrist at the last meeting.
Anybody that is in or near the Portland area that would like to connect for a possible visit PM me and I will give you the BIL contact.
He knows that he has friends here that care for him and should any DUer be able to connect with him he would respond with overwhelming appreciation, because that's who he is.
Tuesday update: He has gone in for a Tracheal tube so that he can get a respirator and a feeding tube which are aimed at giving him stability in the upcoming months. The surgery isn't that difficult or dangerous but Clifford has lost so much muscle that he is on reserves and any little complication could be life threatening.
Two good things are he is getting great care at the VA in Portland and he is a fighter.
Don't expect any news until tomorrow morning.
Original OP
Cliffordu and I struck up one of those unlikely off line DU relationships as we seemingly had radically different sensibilities, Cliffordu had a titanic struggle with addiction and I was pretty close to a teetotaller. Cliffordu had hilarious stories about smoking weed in the army in Vietnam and I had hilarious stories living in Thailand but still haven't had my first cannabis in either smoke or brownie form.
I had lost my phone three months ago along with his phone number and got it back when Mopinko posted this thread updating on his condition:
https://www.democraticunderground.com/10181087603
We kept up a weekly phone routine and over the years I had a lot of strange phone conversations with Clliffordu when he had fallen off the wagon and was going back and forth into rehab. It was as bad as it can get without dying from it. His divorce seemed to have a long lasting destabilizing effect on him. I found it hard to relate and just would listen. He had multiple trips to the emergency room, detox and rehab and it seemed to be locked into a fatal cycle.
Over the last 3 years it changed as he found a new lease by really committing to AA with multiple groups. He got full time employment in a home that was part of the complex rehab/legal system. He was working on his poetry and his music but he more importantly he had balance, perspective and humor that we missed. In the strange ways that these relationships go through he was now helping me stay motivated through business challenges and loss of friends and relatives.
Cliffordu found his place and was making a contribution.
Tomorrow Cliffordu will be having surgery that will help with his breathing as he combats a very aggressive ALS.
I am not really sure what the surgery does because his speech has become labored and monosyllabic as he grasps for air. The advance of this ALS has been stunning. Cliffordu advises he has lost 35 lbs of muscle in the last three months and is down to 135. His voice is a whisper of the loud and gregarious spirit that I was used to and each conversation was weaker than before.
This disease gave Cliffordu one gift, it gave all of the people that he touched a chance to check in with him and informing him of how they felt. A couple of days ago he talked about all of the visitors that were trekking to see him. I told him he was a seed generator, that all of these AA meetings (many times two a day for months at a time) he was throwing out seeds and he would never know how many people he touched.
Beside his family there were dozens of people that came by to see Cliffordu and tell him what he had done for them. "it was just like those seeds. Lots of people I only met a few times came to tell me my words had changed their life and gave them tools and hope. It has blown me away."
He told me this surgery will help him with the breathing and then he will rest and move to his final hospice.
I asked him if there was anything I could do from where I was, was he missing anything.
His answer was in a surprisingly strong voice filled with gratitude for what this last inning gave him in letting him know that he had delivered hope to a bunch that really needed it. His answer captured the clever, smart and very funny Cliffordu:
"The VA has been fantastic, as soon as they confirmed the diagnosis they arranged the best care. My disability was bumped up to $ 3,000. I have doctors, nurses, physical therapists. I have a private room and its like a clown car opens up and people have been streaming in. I have everything I need, everything is great I have no complaints, you know except for the whole dying part".
Cliffordu has been, is now and will always remain one of my heroes.
He will have a chance to read your comments when he wakes up from surgery tomorrow evening.
elleng
(130,895 posts)and for hanging with Cliffordu.
Send him my/our best wishes.
E
democrank
(11,094 posts)Keep on keepin' on.
~PEACE~
Solly Mack
(90,764 posts)Hello Cliffordu,
Glad you're getting such great care.
It may not seem it at times, but we touch the lives of more people than we realize.
Be good at being you - always.
Solly
Hekate
(90,674 posts)Let him know he will be missed here. Peaceful passage, Clifford.
Grantcart and Mopinko: Thank you for the updates, sad as they are.
CaliforniaPeggy
(149,611 posts)Hang in there, sweetie! We are so glad to be here with you. Hope your surgery brings you the help you need.
And thank you, dear grantcart for this great message.
for both of you!
uppityperson
(115,677 posts)May you heal and breath easier.
Say not in grief that he is no more, but live in thankfulness that he was.
Peace be with you.
hlthe2b
(102,236 posts)been there for him. I am especially relieved to hear he is getting good VA care. His courage through all his challenges are life affirming and I wish him only the best his days can offer.
Your account of his struggles with alcohol and ALS leave me amazed and in awe. What a fighter.
Please extend to cliffordu all my very best wishes.
greatauntoftriplets
(175,733 posts)I've missed seeing him around. Clifford, I'm sending DU's famous good vibes to you for a successful surgery.
lapfog_1
(29,199 posts)care and his friends... and grantcart - you have always been one of my favorite DUers.
Best of luck to Cliffordu... but I guess we all must face the ultimate passage at some point so I hope you can face yours having lived a life.
babylonsister
(171,059 posts)Please know I am rooting for you and am glad you are finally getting the care you deserved.
Laura PourMeADrink
(42,770 posts)Feel crappy today but each day forward u will feel better. Good vibes your way darlin.
leftofcool
(19,460 posts)Hope to see you again on DU and really soon. And buddy, if you get to that great mystery beyond before I do, save me a good spot, will ya? We love ya.
murielm99
(30,736 posts)I remember you. I am glad you are getting good care and seeing friends.
pnwmom
(108,977 posts)as you go through this final challenge.
You have given so much to others. Now may it all come flowing back to you.
renate
(13,776 posts)You've touched a lot of lives, here and in the real world ! I'm glad so many of the people who know and love you have come by to tell you how much you mean to them--DU included!
calimary
(81,238 posts)And you get better, Cliffordu, you hear? We need all wits and all hands present and accounted for, as the battle builds in the months ahead. And that definitely means YOU!
Sending many hugs and healing vibes.
demgrrrll
(3,590 posts)progressoid
(49,988 posts)Coventina
(27,115 posts)You are remembered very fondly, and we are all pulling for you!
KY_EnviroGuy
(14,490 posts)Keep working with those new-comers and passing it on. Hope you have an easy recovery from your surgery, and please stay in touch with DU.
.... .......
Cha
(297,196 posts)And, I wondered why we didn't see around anymore. I'm so sorry you have to go through this, Cliffordu, but love it that you're in good spirits
Fla Dem
(23,656 posts)Last edited Tue Jun 12, 2018, 12:18 PM - Edit history (1)
finally reach the place he was searching for all those years.
Cliffordu, may peace and love continue to be with you as you travel to your final destination.
mopinko
(70,090 posts)i'm hoping to go visit next month after things settle down here on my little farm.
i have gotten quite attached to him.
grantcart
(53,061 posts)Kali
(55,007 posts)cliffordu, I hope that you are more comfortable as you read and receive those famous DU Lounge vibes. you have done good human works and that is what truly matters in life. THANK YOU.
samnsara
(17,622 posts)Anon-C
(3,430 posts)...with some joy and peace of mind.
catrose
(5,065 posts)Thinking of you with prayers
Lifelong Protester
(8,421 posts)By now (Tuesday), it is probably all over! Hope your stay is good as well.
Nac Mac Feegle
(970 posts)I understand.
Best of luck, hope everything works out.
panader0
(25,816 posts)And thanks for the fine tribute Grant.
Donkees
(31,392 posts)Uncle Joe
(58,355 posts)Thanks for the thread grantcart.
grantcart
(53,061 posts)hunter
(38,311 posts)There's a few seeds planted here.
grantcart
(53,061 posts)lunatica
(53,410 posts)denbot
(9,899 posts)Best DU vibes for Cliffordu!
In_The_Wind
(72,300 posts)grantcart
(53,061 posts)grantcart
(53,061 posts)oasis
(49,381 posts)Solly Mack
(90,764 posts)Thinking of you, Cliffordu.