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Related: Culture Forums, Support ForumsPost your favorite euphemism for going to the bathroom
My latest favorite is...
I'm going to shake hands with the President.
KPN
(15,647 posts)After reading just the title, i was going to say "going to say hello to the President".
Eyeball_Kid
(7,433 posts)telling it to Trumpy's face. The odd fun occurs by laying down a sheet in the water and letting it all go in the name of all the enraged and motivated neverTrumpers.
Eh.. enjoy your breakfast.
Floyd R. Turbo
(26,549 posts)Pun intended! 😏
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)no_hypocrisy
(46,151 posts)Chemisse
(30,814 posts)I like to refer to it as a need to "use the facilities."
My high school students find the formality of it pretty funny, and it's a nice contrast to comments such as, "I gotta go take a dump."
Motley13
(3,867 posts)baño
wouldn't take ñ in the title
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)Alternatively, casa de ca-ca
demigoddess
(6,644 posts)Cirque du So-What
(25,962 posts)implying that, like a daily walk, it has some therapeutic value.
Bradshaw3
(7,526 posts)Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)I'm going to release the Kraken
Time to walk the snake
I need to go water the lemon tree
Runningdawg
(4,522 posts)I grew up living with extended family. All the women used this expression.
cornball 24
(1,480 posts)TlalocW
(15,388 posts)I need to go evacuate my bowels.
Sometimes in a Boston accent - I have to go take a wicked pissah!
TlalocW
pnwest
(3,266 posts)Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)pnwest
(3,266 posts)underpants
(182,861 posts)For when I'm away from home.
lastlib
(23,266 posts)Ohiogal
(32,036 posts)Glorfindel
(9,732 posts)About as euphemistic as one can get.
malchickiwick
(1,474 posts)hermetic
(8,310 posts)shake the dew off the lily. Heard this in TN a lot, many years ago.
Iggo
(47,563 posts)benld74
(9,909 posts)mac56
(17,574 posts)Drain the main vein.
WheelWalker
(8,955 posts)Bucky
(54,041 posts)Indoors I'll say something like "make a strafing run", or more prosaically "hit the head".
Also used:
* draw Excalibre
* drop a duke
* catch up on my reading
* make a Trump video
Solly Mack
(90,779 posts)Have lots of books in the bathroom.
unblock
(52,286 posts)these days it's smartphone time, though....
Solly Mack
(90,779 posts)hibbing
(10,103 posts)Drain the pickle
Drop the kids off at the pool
Peace
applegrove
(118,749 posts)She would always say that.
LeftInTX
(25,490 posts)"I'm gotta talk to a guy about a horse".
At first I took it literally....but I was bewildered cuz my BF was really into cars...He was so into cars that I thought horse was maybe slang for a car.
PoindexterOglethorpe
(25,873 posts)COLGATE4
(14,732 posts)First Speaker
(4,858 posts)...instead of going to the toilet. Or, for that matter, urinating and defecating...
The Velveteen Ocelot
(115,806 posts)DinahMoeHum
(21,803 posts). . .sailor/Navy expression, doncha know?
GreydeeThos
(958 posts)I'll be right with you but I gotta hit the head first.
Tommy_Carcetti
(43,189 posts)bluestarone
(17,012 posts)The Blue Flower
(5,444 posts)Is this a southern thing? I heard it growing up in Florida.
Wounded Bear
(58,685 posts)"I have to pee like a wild race horse."
ps: I grew up in Washington. Not totally sure where I picked that up, though.
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)PassingFair
(22,434 posts)some timber.
sarge43
(28,942 posts)lastlib
(23,266 posts)using the Trump Dump....
smirkymonkey
(63,221 posts)AmandaRuth
(3,105 posts)a friend said that to me years ago, and i still use it.
Leith
(7,813 posts)Surprising that nobody has said that one yet...
uriel1972
(4,261 posts)already a euphamism?
GeorgeHayduke
(1,227 posts)Or "torque off a moonfish", or "leave a steamy klinker".
I spent way too much time in college thinking about this.
SummerSnow
(12,608 posts)malthaussen
(17,215 posts)Not that I've ever been in the Navy.
-- Mal
enid602
(8,642 posts)Squeeze a loaf.
Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)Major Nikon
(36,827 posts)McCamy Taylor
(19,240 posts)wishstar
(5,271 posts)and when they came out of bathroom saying one of those expressions, I would always sarcastically say "well, I'm proud" or "congratulations"