The Onion Reviews 'Dawn of the Planet of the Apes' (NSFW)

[Katashi_itto]

[Bjorn Against]

1. I thought Dawn of the Planet of the Apes was one of the best movies of the year

I get that this is the Onion and the review was satirical, but Dawn of the Planet of the Apes should not be dismissed as just another chapter in a franchise that has been around a long time. The movie blew away all my expectations, the charachters were all very complex and interesting, the apes were incredibly realistic and showed real emotions, there were lots of moral ambiguities which allowed you to understand and emphasize with both the humans and the apes, it was just a very good movie all around. As far as blockbuster movies go it was probably the best of its genre that I have seen in the last several years, maybe it is a new chapter in a long running franchise but that did not stop it from feeling very original.

[Katashi_itto]

4. I agree, same here.

[mountain grammy]

10. Thought the "Rise" was excellent, never cared for the originals..

When the ape said "Cesar is home" I lost it. Haven't seen Dawn yet, will do so soon.

[Spitfire of ATJ]

13. So was "Hansel and Gretel - Witch Hunters"...

A good blend of action, horror and comedy.

[GreatGazoo]

2. Might Ducks 4 - LOL

[JHB]

3. This would probably be funnier if I were a professional film critic

Since I'm not, I seem to be the wrong audience for this.

[zeemike]

5. Bwahahaha...

That is how I feel about most block buster movies from major studios...they got nothing to offer us but remake trash with a lot of glitter on them...it shows a lack of imagination and creativity by the big movie makers.

[Katashi_itto]

6. Wish he hadnt picked "Dawn" it was actually brillant

[zeemike]

7. Perhaps it is just because I am getting old.

But I can't watch Hollywood blockbuster movies anymore.
Too much short action clips and violence and lots of noise...screeming and explosions...which seems to be what they think is a movie.
The only films I have seen lately that I like are independent ones.

[Katashi_itto]

8. This is really a great movie, its amazing how much emotion the apes projected

[paleotn]

11. I'm sure you're right, but I'm not much on remakes....

...I suppose the original 1968 version seems a bit cheesy and irrelevant to younger generations, but it still speaks to me. Particularly the last scene. Back then many of us always had in the very back reaches of our minds that intentionally or accidentally we could be nuked and our civilization destroyed and who knows what would replace us.

[Bjorn Against]

14. It is not a remake, it is a prequel to the 1968 original

If you are a fan of the original than I would definitely recommend you watch the new movies as they tell the story of what happened before the events of the 1968 movie. Start with Rise of the Planet of the Apes which is a very good movie although it is also very different than the other Planet of the Apes movies as it mostly focuses on how Caesar was raised. Rise sets up Dawn of the Planet of the Apes perfectly however, and Dawn really starts to take on the more post-apocalyptic feel of the original. If you enjoyed the original I think you would really enjoy the new movies, they are very well written and the apes are amazing characters to watch on screen.

[MrMickeysMom]

9. Doesn't this remind you of reality TV and busting the screen writer's guild?

Of course, the quality of screen writing was severely challenged by the House Committee on Un-American Activities in the 40's… Then, trickle down Reagan era exacerbated what passed off as quality further until what we have here is-

1) Reality TV ( )

2) Re-makes of reality tv

Until you run out of ideas because you have non, nor the strength of screen writing that amounts to anything in Hollywood or Television City.

I stick to some Al Jazeera, Moyers, some PBS and Science channel, with as many Star Trek TNG to avoid puking further, as it's the only original thought out there. As for the re-worked, CGI filled, prequel and sequel stuff, well, I've been there, so I'm not your first run audience dudes and dudetts.

[world wide wally]

12. Had me laughing out loud!