The Republicans’ Crazy Party Platforms
by Paul Begala Jul 9, 2012 1:00 AM EDT
What do Republicans really want? Read the fine print.
... Texas Republicans hate the heavy hand of government. And so they oppose mandatory preschool and kindergarten, mandatory immunizations, mandatory, well, mandatory mandates. It’s one thing to be antigovernment. It’s another to be pro-stupid. Yet the Texas GOP actually opposes thinking. Seriously, their platform proudly declares: “We oppose the teaching of Higher Order Thinking Skills, critical-thinking skills, and similar programs.” As the Texas populist Jim Hightower likes to say, if ignorance is bliss, these are the happiest people on earth ...
... For those keeping score at home, mandating a polio vaccine: tyranny. Mandating invasive ultrasound: freedom ...
On the economy, the Texans proudly quote at great length from the GOP’s national platform—from 1932. I kid you not. These folks pine for the policies of Herbert Hoover. They want to repeal the minimum wage, abolish the Federal Reserve, and return to the gold standard. By next year they’ll be calling for a return to wampum and barter.
Lest you think this is just a Texas thing, let us check in with the unfailingly nice, polite, and progressive people of Minnesota. Their GOP platform also calls for abolition of the Fed, but would further defund the arts and public radio ... Minnesota’s Republicans love our Constitution, but want to add an amendment declaring that life begins at conception and allowing men who impregnate women to have an equal say in what happens to the fetus. The platform is silent as to whether rapists would be so empowered ...
http://www.thedailybeast.com/newsweek/2012/07/08/paul-begala-the-republicans-crazy-party-platforms.html
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