Historians Uncover Lost Socrates Dialogues
Historians Uncover Lost Socrates Dialogues Where He Just Gave Up And Started Screaming That Opponent A Fucking Brainwashed Shill
CAMBRIDGE, MAIn a landmark discovery that sheds new light on the development of Western thought, historians announced Tuesday they had found several lost Socratic dialogues in which the ancient Greek philosopher simply gives up and screams that his debate opponents are all fucking brainwashed shills.
In these newly unearthed texts, there are numerous instances in which Socrates accuses his interlocutors of having small penises before going on to claim he has fucked their wives, said Harvard University professor Helen Speck, citing dialogues in which Socrates proposes that anyone who disagrees with him is a pathetic piece of shit on the payroll of the Athenian aristocracy and ought to just kill himself.
Weve uncovered many rhetorical tactics previously undocumented in the classical canon, such as Socrates tendency to scream Fuck you! ad nauseam until his challenger stopped trying to express his viewpoint. We even have contemporaneous accounts suggesting Socrates doxxed his opponents, posting their addresses all over the Acropolis and inciting his followers to harass them. Its pretty amazing to see our cultures philosophical tradition being born here.
Speck added that Plato, the most famous student of Socrates, received an education centered around learning to shout a stream of relentless, unsubstantiated libel at anyone believed to be a giant pussy.
https://www.theonion.com/historians-uncover-lost-socrates-dialogues-where-he-jus-1833416965
CaliforniaPeggy
(149,627 posts)This is for you:
procon
(15,805 posts)Blue_playwright
(1,568 posts)But it was the onion. Sigh.