Darrell Issa proposes renaming the ocean after Ronald Reagan

[ProSense]

Darrell Issa proposes renaming the ocean after Ronald Reagan

by Hunter

The laser-like Republican focus on jobs continues:

Rep. Darrell Issa (R-Calif.) is floating legislation that would name most U.S. coastal waters after former President Ronald Reagan.

Issa reintroduced his bill Wednesday to rename the country’s Exclusive Economic Zone (EEZ), which generally extends from three miles to 200 miles offshore, as the Ronald Wilson Reagan Exclusive Economic Zone.

To be fair, we're not talking about renaming all the oceans after Ronald Reagan. Just any parts of them within 200 miles of America, in honor of the guy who first said "yeah, all that over there? That's ours."

While creating at least several jobs in the lucrative map-printing sector of the economy, this otherwise seems a rather pointless little exercise. For one thing, I thought true conservatives hated Ronald Reagan now, but it turns out that while they now hate most of what he said and did, they still like putting his name on things. So he's a lot like Jesus in that way. Or would be, if Jesus hated unions and the environment and said things like "bring all of the offshore oil within two hundred miles of here unto me, because I hath called dibs upon it."

Where were we? Oh yes, jobs. Hundreds of thousands of jobs created by renaming every single thing in America after Ronald Reagan, the only modern Republican president conservatives still acknowledge the existence of. There's at least 50,000 permanent jobs to be gained in this one proposal by Issa alone, as we send minimum-wage workers out to repeatedly spray paint Ronald Reagan's name on the ocean surface until it finally sticks.

Ha! Just kidding. We wouldn't pay them minimum wage. Ronald Reagan would have hated that.

http://www.dailykos.com/story/2012/07/21/1112154/-Darrell-Issa-proposes-renaming-the-ocean-after-Ronald-Reagan

I propose renaming Issa "Congressman Dumbfuck."

[NRaleighLiberal]

1. I think we should name the floating plastic bag garbage island after St Ronnie. that OK with me.

[Scuba]

2. DUzy

[DeeJay]

3. Actually that would be tragically apropos

considering the nature of the disease that killed him.

Clumps of garbage in his brain.

[freshwest]

11. +1

[quinnox]

13. ....

[burrowowl]

26. Yes!

Good post!

[Motown_Johnny]

27. I can go drop a floater and name it after Reagan

Does that count?

[valerief]

29. Beeyootiful suggestion!

[XemaSab]

35. .

[thelordofhell]

4. The Dipshit Zone??

[jmowreader]

5. Send me to the White House...

the first thing I will do is dereaganize this country. Look up destalinization to see how it's done.

[Ruby the Liberal]

6. Is this a joke?

[Pool Hall Ace]

14. I, for one, keep telling myself it must be.

[LongTomH]

42. Every time something like this comes out of the Repuke controlled House, I pray...

...Dear Lord, please let this be a joke!

By the way, who was the Repuke president they wanted to add to Mt. Rushmore?

[muriel_volestrangler]

54. No, it's horribly true:

112th CONGRESS

2d Session

H. R. 6147

To designate the exclusive economic zone of the United States as the ‘Ronald Wilson Reagan Exclusive Economic Zone of the United States’.

IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES

July 18, 2012

Mr. ISSA introduced the following bill; which was referred to the Committee on Natural Resources
...
http://www.govtrack.us/congress/bills/112/hr6147/text

And the stupid fucker tried it 5 years ago too:

110th CONGRESS
1st Session
H. R. 27

To designate the exclusive economic zone of the United States as the `Ronald Wilson Reagan Exclusive Economic Zone of the United States'.

IN THE HOUSE OF REPRESENTATIVES
January 4, 2007

Mr. ISSA introduced the following bill; which was referred to the Committee on Natural Resources

http://www.opencongress.org/bill/110-h27/text

[Bennyboy]

7. Rename the San Andreas fault after Ronald Ray-gun!

Reagan's fault!

Sounds about perfect if you ask me.

[freshwest]

12. +1,000

[mopinko]

20. ++ duzy

[Ruby the Liberal]

21. Zing!

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

8. Let's rename the Bermuda Triangle after Reagan, too.

And maybe the fucking Moon, while we're at it.

[tularetom]

9. Geez, when you post something from the Onion you should at least include a link

Oh wait, this is fucking serious isn't it?

In that case:

[Jim Lane]

15. Yeah, when I saw the headline I thought, "Great stuff from the Onion!"

I wonder if the Onion writers are ever tempted to put out a contract on someone like Issa. He makes it so hard for them to satirize reality.

[ThoughtCriminal]

22. It's what I call "An Oponion"

Oponion:

An opinion or idea so shockingly absurd, that you think it had to come from The Onion

[arcane1]

30. It's the new Poe's Law

Love it!

[LuckyLib]

10. He and Nancy must be working together. Doesn't this idiot Congressperson

have anything better to do? He's a Republican. Evidently not.

[struggle4progress]

16. Why not just rename all the cities and towns in California's 49th Congressional District "Reagan"?

Rename Perris "Reagan," rename Temecula "Reagan," rename Fallbrook "Reagan," rename Vista "Reagan," rename Oceanside "Reagan," ...

[Iggo]

17. What a fucking idiot.

[BumRushDaShow]

18. "I propose renaming Issa; 'Congressman Dumbfuck.' "

Seconded.

[arcane1]

33. I renamed my cat's butt her "Issahole"

[aka-chmeee]

19. How about renaming our ocean of debt "The Ronald Reagan Legacy Ocean"? nt

[sellitman]

23. The stupid is very, very strong in Issa

It's breathtaking actually

[aint_no_life_nowhere]

24. I want the entire universe to be called The Ronald Reagan Universe

After all, he created it in seven days, did he not?

[Major Hogwash]

25. Issa is running for re-election this year while sucking as much as he can.

He couldn't win an election for head garbageman anywhere other than his district.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

28. Darrell Issa can kiss my ass.

[Tierra_y_Libertad]

31. Would that make it the Exclusive Excrement Zone?

[lonestarnot]

32. The dead parts?

[appleannie1]

34. That would take the beauty out of going to the beach. What a stupid idea.

[abolugi]

36. This man

is an absolute embarrassment for California!

I hang my head in shame!

[Tikki]

38. These repugs in California are totally irrelevant here, they know it...

and have nothing better to do than make up this kind of sh*t.
We need to rename the bird poop that clings to the docks and piers: ronnie reagan.

Tikki

[Freedomofspeech]

37. Nothing better to do?

The country is going to hell and this is what this moron is concerned about. Did all of the republicans brains fall out when GW became president?

[neeksgeek]

40. In this case,

I think "brains falling out" is sadly impossible.

[magic59]

39. If their going to name it after Reagan then

why not just call it Blundering Idiot?

I can't wait till they start the Reagan Mt. Rushmore.

[MrScorpio]

41. Shit, just rename everything after Reagan and get it over with n/t

[Metro135]

43. More appropriate

Since it was Reagan's contention that trees cause pollution, wouldn't it be more appropriate to name one of our national forests after him?

Or has that been done already?

[Octafish]

44. Cape Kennedy was returned to its original name of Cape Canaveral.

Not that the Democrat got us to the moon, let alone kept us out of nuclear war and integrated the FBI and Secret Service.

[NYC Liberal]

45. How long until Republicans propose renaming Earth to "Reagan"?

[jp11]

46. We can name the oceans after Reagan after all the people who want to vote for it

get his face tattooed on their bodies.

I want him on their face, their eyelids, their arms, their chests, their backs, their arms, their legs, their thighs, their buttocks, their feet, and their genitals.

If they don't love him that much then they don't get to name shit after him.

[ejbr]

47. Ok, then Seal Team 6 should be renamed Obama Team 6 n/t

[roguevalley]

48. gawd. fuck this shit. Issa needs to be slapped into the fourth dimension.

[muntrv]

49. Name the sewage treatment plant after Reagan.

Just like San Francisco named its sewage treatment plant after Dimson.

[Angry Dragon]

50. Something better:

I have to go take a Ronald Reagan now ...............

[highplainsdem]

51. When I first saw the subject line, I thought this HAD to be from The Onion.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

52. WTF!?

I will not call National Airport 'Reagan' when I fly out of there I am told Reagan and I tell them that airport doesn't exist. As for the coastal waters Issa is toally crazy, round the bend.

[petronius]

53. Considering that I pee in the ocean pretty much everytime I surf or dive,

I'm actually sort of OK with this.

But I like the San Andreas idea better, not to mention your highly appropriate moniker for Issa...

[Turbineguy]

55. Great idea!

But should we wait until the Ocean is dead?

[muriel_volestrangler]

56. In 2007, Romney proposed the "Reagan Zone Of Economic Freedom"

which would be multiple countries. Zombie Reagan Conquers the World!

Governor Romney's Vision For Opening Markets And Helping American Workers Succeed:

Launching A New Agenda For Opening Markets Including A "Reagan Zone Of Economic Freedom" To Fuel A New Wave Of Global Prosperity:
...
- Launching A "Reagan Zone Of Economic Freedom" Among Nations Committed To High Standards and Enforcement: We need bold ideas to address the new global economy. Starting with a core of U.S. free trade agreement partners, Governor Romney would seek to bring together nations committed to open markets and playing by the rules in the largest ever Free Trade Area, and go beyond traditional trade to promote high standards in areas critical to U.S. competitiveness. The Reagan Zone Of Economic Freedom would act as an alliance working together internally, in the World Trade organization and elsewhere to push reforms and work cooperatively in areas like labor and the environment. Governor Romney would seek to expand these efforts to include the European Union and other nations that agree to meet these standards, while challenging China and others advancing agreements that exclude America.

http://www.presidency.ucsb.edu/ws/index.php?pid=96121

via Indecision Forever

[Spitfire of ATJ]

57. And then he parted it.

[IMG][/IMG]

(couldn't resist creating this)

[Fire Walk With Me]

58. Republican oceans...yes, they ARE in that bad of a condition, so it's apropos.

Used up, wasted away, used as garbage dumps by business and the unconscious...very Republican. I'll allow it.

[progressivebydesign]

59. WTF? Issa has got to be the 2nd most useless official, after Bachman.

Unreal. Reagan is NO hero to California. If I was Issa's constituents, I'd dump his ass asap. He has done nothing at all for his District... he spends all his time trying to bring down the President, and now this fluffy bullshit waste of money.

[jmowreader]

60. Isn't there a stolen-car registry we can name for Darrell Issa?

[eppur_se_muova]

61. I've long favored a Reagan-Bush Memorial National Debt.

Shouldn't a man's name be linked to his most memorable accomplishment ?

[hifiguy]

62. Issa is to unreconstructed asshattery

what Mt. Everest is to big hills.

[Rose Siding]

63. And they pay him for that crap.

[Higgs boson]

64. When I saw the headline I thought they meant the Red Sea.........

[Kablooie]

65. I'm cool with that.

Asshat zone is a fine name.

[rl6214]

66. That's just fucking nuts

[Raine]

67. Good luck with that you worthless car thief! nt

[DFW]

68. The Ronald Reagan Dead Zone

Somewhere off the coast of California, although it has no permanent location, if I understand correctly.

How about a sewage treatment plant? Or wha's left of the Aral Sea? I'm sure the Russians wouldn't mind.

[DCKit]

69. Geez, would it be so difficult to simply litter his daily path with ignition switches?

We've got to find some way to keep this guy busy and quiet.

[nichomachus]

70. I propose that we name everything after Reagan -- everything

Then no one will know what anything is, where they are, where they're going, or where they just came from -- just like Reagan.

[Arkana]

71. Good lord, the worship of that doddering old fool is just sickening.

[Alduin]

72. Wait, what?

Of all the things that needs to be done in this country, this is what Issa focuses on?

[Octafish]

73. The Sea of Red Ink

Red Ink Ronnie

http://web.archive.org/web/20050405113406/http://www.geocities.com/thereaganyears/economicpolicy.htm



Pruneface Woodenhead, Mafia