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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsTrump Says Mueller Just Called Him and Said Hes the Most Innocent Person Ever
By Andy Borowitz
August 3, 2017
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)The special counsel, Robert Mueller, just called Donald Trump to tell the President that he was the most innocent person ever, Trump told reporters on Thursday.
It was the middle of the afternoon, and he just picked up the phone to say how innocent I was, Trump said. He said I was the most innocent person hed ever come across, and maybe in history.
He said he had been over all of the evidence and that he and his staff would spend hours just looking at each other in amazement at about how unbelievably innocent I was, he said.
Trump said that he asked Mueller why, in his opinion, the media had reported so many stories about his campaign colluding with Russians. Bob said to me, Are you talking about the failing New York Times and CNN? Trump reported. They have been very unfair to you. They are bad (or sick) people. Sad! Thats what Bob said to me.
The conversation wound down with a series of pleasantries, Trump said, with Mueller complimenting him on the size of his 2016 victory, including his enormous win in New Hampshire.
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-says-mueller-just-called-him-and-said-hes-the-most-innocent-person-ever?mbid=nl_080317%20Borowitz%20Newsletter2%20
Solly Mack
(90,778 posts)syringis
(5,101 posts)What orange buffon missed, is the 2nd part of Muller's statement. The full one was :
M Prez ( prez?? not so much, mumbles Muller) you are the most innocent person ever ( Muller doing his best not to suffocate), as innocent as are hyppopotamus, gators and rattlesnakes the most friendly pets ever
Hieronymus
(6,039 posts)Scarsdale
(9,426 posts)makes me have more respect for him than tRump. The man commands RESPECT, while tRump is a clown. Mueller and his team of professionals must have some truly disgusting evidence against tRump and his band of mobsters. I wonder if this 17 day "vacation" will include a mental exam for little Don the Con, so he can claim diminished capacity at the trial?
mfcorey1
(11,001 posts)Thanks for the laugh! 😂
mdbl
(4,973 posts)I had to look back at the byline to make sure. I can see trump saying all that and more - even if it's all lies. That's what is SAD.