Where "Beauregard" becomes "Number 3480134." . . . Please come CAPTION Jeff Sessons!!!!

[skip fox]

Jeff (Letter of the Law) Sessions is saying: " . . . but I'm not 'weaseling out' of anything! . . . To lie, you have to intend to lie. . . . You gotta think about it, . . .plan to do it, . . . wait for precisely the right moment, . . . then flat out go for it!. . . . What I said was spur of the moment. . . . How is that trying to 'weasel out' of anything?"

***********************************************


Above CAPTION based on the following Washington Post story:

https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-fix/wp/2017/03/02/jeff-sessionss-denials-of-contact-with-russians-are-falling-apart-quickly/?utm_term=.70bfb9e36065

[Buckeyeblue]

1. Hold on! Let's not forget I'm white!

[Blanks]

2. I did not have communications with those Russians. eom

[RKP5637]

3. "Please, just one more chance!" n/t

[malaise]

4. What a blink blink blink

blinking mess

[oasis]

5. "Will Dana Carvey play me on Saturday Night Live?"

[randome]

6. "Off the record, I only had consensual sex with Russian spies. I was gathering information."

"Yeah. Sure. That's it. I was deep under cover. Wait, that doesn't...can we move on to something else?
[hr][font color="blue"][center]A ton of bricks, a ton of feathers, it's still gonna hurt.[/center][/font][hr]

[skip fox]

7. Jeff Sessions is saying:

"Well, Senator, he likes it a lot of ways. . . . When you plant a big, fat smooch on one of those posterior cheeks, he squeals, and when you shove your face right up there and give him a helicopter, why, . . . you'd think he'd died and gone to heaven. . . . So the answer is, Senator, he really likes it, but he isn't particular."

[Johonny]

8. What you do in a bathroom is my business and what I do behind my Senator's door is not yours...

I can't recall meeting any Russians, I mean to clarify my remarks further, I met with Russians but only while wearing my Senator's cap and not my member of Trump's election team cap (The official make Session's great but also not a member of team anymore even though he was on the team by lying about it to FOX viewers' cap ((made in China)), to further clarify that, it was a woman's flower hat. Yellow, I believe to match my eyes. I mean I don't smoke pot or cross dress in my own time. Let me make this clear, Transsexual pot smokers forced me to lie about my Russian contacts while under oath. They must be destroyed.

[skip fox]

9. Remembr what your mother said about crossing your eyes.

They might get stuck.

(You could be channeling these bozos for years.)

[lagomorph777]

10. "I did not have international relations with that man, Sergey Kislyak."

[Johonny]

11. And you don't want to even know what's on that blue dress

[skip fox]

12. Jeff Sessions is saying:

"For one, I don't like prison food. Also my legs swell up with shackles."

[Goblinmonger]

13. "Oh...RUSSIANS...yeah, yup, I did meet with them. My bad. Totally slipped my mind."

[Johonny]

14. Lock me up, lock me up, lock me up!