Satire: Congress Passes Bill Banning Trump Toilet Paper

[MineralMan]

On First Day of Session, Congress Puts Kibosh on Trump TP

by
T. P. Fower Bunghole

With sales of toilet tissue bearing the face of President-Elect Donald Trump reaching astronomical highs since the November election. Paul Ryan is pushing a bill in the House of Representatives banning the production and sales of parody TP of this nature. A parallel bill in the Senate has been introduced by Senate Majority Leader Mitch McConnell.

When asked about the bill, Speaker Ryan quipped, "I know we have the First Amendment and all that, but wiping one's ass with Trump's face should be a felony, and we plan to see to it that such obscene hygiene products go off the market. It's disrespectful of our Glorious Leader and anyone who does that should be arrested and jailed."

The ACLU has already announced plans for a suit in a federal district court if this bill is passed. "We can never allow any such bill to take effect," a spokesperson stated. "We'll take the people's right to wipe with Donald Trump toilet paper to the Supreme Court, if necessary." Plans are to introduce the case in the 9th Judicial District, where it will be heard in California.

[lame54]

1. The problem with Trump TP is...

That you end up dirtier than when you started

[MFM008]

2. To late

I have mine.

[MineralMan]

4. Use it sparingly. One square at a time.

There may not be any more available.

[MFM008]

7. I will

The poor trees that died for that................

[Gothmog]

3. it is hard to tell satire from reality right now

[MineralMan]

5. If it's not hard, the satire isn't very good.

[Angry Dragon]

6. the reality is not very good either