Amazon reviewer: "BEWARE! I put (Ivanka's boots) on and I was transported back to Berlin in 1933"

[Miles Archer]

Of the myriad ways to express disappointment with the outcome of the 2016 election, detractors are finding a clever outlet to attack Donald Trump and the Trump brand: Amazon.

Tricky Internet jokesters are inundating the review page for a pair of Ivanka Trump’s bootswith 1-star posts, conspicuously threading their punny political opinions throughout.

“Every time I tried to express my opinions, I was horrified to find myself bellowing, “HEIL TRUMP!” one use wrote. “Very embarrassing.”

“BUYER BEWARE!” another warned. “These boots are some sort of port key or wrinkle in the space time continuum. I put them on and I was transported back to Berlin in 1933.”

http://www.rawstory.com/2016/12/these-boots-will-make-your-dad-want-to-fck-you-reviewers-assail-ivanka-trumps-boots-on-amazon/

[Dark n Stormy Knight]

1. Ah, funny Amazon reviews. There have been some good ones.

You can find lists of the funniest Amazon reviews. I particularly enjoyed the ones for the book, How to Avoid Huge Ships.

For instance:

Review by Citizenfitz

“I bought How to Avoid Huge Ships as a companion to Captain Trimmer’s other excellent titles: How to Avoid a Train, and How to Avoid the Empire State Building. These books are fast paced, well written and the hard won knowledge found in them is as inspirational as it is informational. After reading them I haven’t been hit by anything bigger than a diesel bus. Thanks captain!”

And

Review by Cap’n Crunch

“This book really is one of the best huge ship avoidance references I’ve come across, not just for the effective methods it teaches as to avoiding huge ships, but also for exploding some of the huge ship avoidance myths that many of us take for granted.

For example:
– Do not charge the huge ship at full speed in an attempt to scare it off. This may work with coyotes, but it is less effective with huge ships.
– Similarly, do not roll your boat over and play dead. Unless the huge ship is captained by a grizzly bear, this will not work.
– Do not attempt to go under the huge ship. This is typically not successful.
– Do not attempt to jump over the huge ship.

Captain Trimmer presents a rather novel technique for avoiding huge ships – move your boat out of the path of the huge ship. I know what you’re thinking, this goes against conventional wisdom, but Trimmer presents significant empirical evidence to support his theory. Indeed, over the long run, moving out of the way will dramatically decrease the number of huge ship collisions you will have to endure in your daily life.”