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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsTRUMP BLAMES BAD POLL NUMBERS ON EXISTENCE OF NUMERICAL SYSTEM (Borowitz)
YOUNGSTOWN, OHIO (The Borowitz Report)Donald J. Trump lashed out at a new target on Monday, blaming his bad poll numbers on the existence of the numerical system.
In sometimes rambling remarks at an outdoor rally in Ohio, the Republican Presidential nominee called the numerical system rigged and unleashed a torrent of abuse on numbers themselves, calling them disgusting and the lowest form of life.
Its why I wont release my taxes, he said. Theyre full of goddam numbers.
While Republican candidates in the past have attempted to exploit their supporters distrust of math, Trump is believed to be the first nominee to call into question the numerical system itself.
In sometimes rambling remarks at an outdoor rally in Ohio, the Republican Presidential nominee called the numerical system rigged and unleashed a torrent of abuse on numbers themselves, calling them disgusting and the lowest form of life.
Its why I wont release my taxes, he said. Theyre full of goddam numbers.
While Republican candidates in the past have attempted to exploit their supporters distrust of math, Trump is believed to be the first nominee to call into question the numerical system itself.
http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-blames-bad-poll-numbers-on-existence-of-numerical-system
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TRUMP BLAMES BAD POLL NUMBERS ON EXISTENCE OF NUMERICAL SYSTEM (Borowitz) (Original Post)
icymist
Aug 2016
OP
As his base says, "It's about time!!! I was never no good with my numbers. Letters too!!!"
63splitwindow
Aug 2016
#4
Xipe Totec
(43,890 posts)1. Arabic numbers, no less. It's a conspiracy! nt
Gothmog
(145,321 posts)2. I love good satire
Eugene
(61,900 posts)3. Great satire, but it sounds all too plausible.
Trump and his true believers really are this crazy.
63splitwindow
(2,657 posts)4. As his base says, "It's about time!!! I was never no good with my numbers. Letters too!!!"