Anyone else dumbfounded by the lack of empathy from a friend/family member about Paris?

[mnhtnbb]

Last edited Sun Nov 15, 2015, 04:09 PM - Edit history (1)

I have racist/right wing relatives on my husband's side of the family who live in Georgia.
I expect to see nasty, anti-Obama screeds on their fb pages, so I've hidden their posts on my fb feed, but not unfriended them (to keep my husband happy).
I also can check once in a while about family happenings.

Well, I was astonished on Friday--after I posted a photo of the Empire State Building lit
in tri-colors with the comment "New York stands with Paris"--to see this remark from one of my husband's Georgia nephews.

"HOW??? We shed a tear for them?? Works for me and makes me feel good. We better wake up and smell the Chardonnay."

WTF?

After much discussion with my husband on whether I should call this relative out--post another snide comment--let it go--or
post something else, I decided to share the emotional essay written by a young woman survivor of the Bataclan massacre,
along with this comment:

Anyone who finds it difficult to relate to the absolute terror of this experience
needs to examine his (her) humanity. The people who found themselves trapped in either of the World Trade Center Buildings understand. This is why One World Trade Center was lit up in the tri-colors on Saturday night, as was the Empire State Building on Friday night.

This is the emotional essay penned by Isobel Bowdery

you never think it will happen to you. It was just a friday night at a rock show. the atmosphere was so happy and everyone was dancing and smiling. and then when the men came through the front entrance and began the shooting, we naiively believed it was all part of the show. It wasn't just a terrorist attack, it was a massacre. Dozens of people were shot right infront of me. Pools of blood filled the floor. Cries of grown men who held their girlfriends dead bodies pierced the small music venue. Futures demolished, families heartbroken. in an instant. Shocked and alone, I pretended to be dead for over an hour, lying among people who could see their loved ones motionless.. Holding my breath, trying to not move, not cry - not giving those men the fear they longed to see. I was incredibly lucky to survive. But so many didn't. The people who had been there for the exact same reasons as I - to have a fun friday night were innocent. This world is cruel. And acts like this are suppose to highlight the depravity of humans and the images of those men circuling us like vultures will haunt me for the rest of my life. The way they meticoulsy aimed at shot people around the standing area i was in the centre of without any consideration for human life. It didn't feel real. i expected any moment for someone to say it was just a nightmare. But being a survivor of this horror lets me able to shed light on the heroes. To the man who reassured me and put his life on line to try and cover my brain whilst i whimpered, to the couple whose last words of love kept me believing the good in the world, to the police who succeded in rescuing hundreds of people, to the complete strangers who picked me up from the road and consoled me during the 45 minutes I truly believed the boy i loved was dead, to the injured man who i had mistaken for him and then on my recognition that he was not Amaury, held me and told me everything was going to be fine despite being all alone and scared himself, to the woman who opened her doors to the survivors, to the friend who offered me shelter and went out to buy new clothes so i wouldnt have to wear this blood stained top, to all of you who have sent caring messages of support - you make me believe this world has the potential to be better. to never let this happen again. but most of this is to the 80 people who were murdered inside that venue, who weren't as lucky, who didnt get to wake up today and to all the pain that their friends and families are going through. I am so sorry. There's nothing that will fix the pain. I feel priviledged to be there for their last breaths. And truly beliving that I would join them, I promise that their last thoughts were not on the animals who caused all this. It was thinking of the people they loved. As i lay down in the blood of strangers and waiting for my bullet to end my mere 22 years, I envisioned every face that I have ever loved and whispered I love you. over and over again. reflecting on the highlights of my life. Wishing that those i love knew just how much, wishing that they knew that no matter what happened to me, to keep belieivng in the good in people. to not let those men win. Last night, the lives of many were forever changed and it is up to us to be better people. to live lives that the innocent victims of this tragedy dreamt about but sadly will now never be able to fulfil. RIP angels. You will never be forgotten.

Anyone else appalled by the lack of humanity shown by relatives/friends on fb?

[lpbk2713]

1. Some RWNutjobs have been listening to Limbaugh & Hannity et al for too long.

It's Pavlovian. They know by now what is expected of them under a given set of circumstances.
Sorry you have to deal with it on a personal level. You can pick your friends but ...

[mnhtnbb]

9. Yes. This particular guy has been listening to Slimebaugh for at least 20 years.

He got his dad listening, too, who is my husband's brother-in-law. One time
when he and his wife (my husband's sister) were visiting us in the late 90's
he asked for a radio so he could listen to Slimebaugh in his room without
having to go out to his car.

That was a challenge. Be a good hostess and provide what the guest requests?
Or say, "not in my house"!

I gave him the radio.

The family dynamic is tough, really tough.

[beac]

13. Wonder if he would have accommodated you in his home had you wished for

a radio to listen to a liberal program.

I bet not.

It's always a one-way street with the right-wing brainwashed.

[uppityperson]

2. I have gone around with an unexpected one. France closed their air space after

911 so why should we care about them now. I have links and quotes showing that wasn't true, it was papabush gulf war they did so but nooooooo. It's still their memory and no facts can change their mind. I was gobsmacked.

It is incredible.

[LiberalArkie]

5. The French have been involved with Africa and the Middle East a lot longer than the U.S. has been

and they knew better than to get involved. However they got bullied into it and now......

[catbyte]

3. No. I've cut them out of my life--IRL and online. Life is just too short. I realize you want to keep

peace in your family, but I don't have any bagger relatives to placate. I'm sorry I don't have any suggestions for you, just sympathy. It must be frustrating.

[spiderpig]

4. Isobel's essay had me in tears

I'm fortunate enough to have Facebook friends that are sensitive and supportive. But we all know what's out there. You just hope these cretins don't move into your neighborhood.

Strength to our Parisian friends.

[mnhtnbb]

10. Isobel's essay was so emotional.

I can only hope that this relative will realize what I'm saying, but there's no guarantee
that he'll see it since I didn't call him out, specifically.

[tblue37]

16. Evrn though she did not paragraph, you should

insert some breaks. It was VERY hard to read without breaks, and few will bother unless you add breaks.

[Tipperary]

6. I guess I am lucky not to have friends or relatives like that.

My friends are all horrified by the attacks, as am I.

[No Vested Interest]

7. I have also hidden relatives on FB to not see their vacuous postings of

stupid right-wing junk, including pro-gun material.
So, yes, I can peek in when photos of new babies are posted, or read angry screeds when the marriage is in bad shape. I don't see much to be gained in my case of calling them out.

Even though I don't post political material, they can see my "like" of Jimmy Carter, for instance, and know where I stand.

I don't believe one changes minds with Facebook postings, when they still have their families, their media choices, and maybe even their ministers reaffirming those choices daily.

[Warpy]

8. I expect exactly this sort of thing from right wingers

which is why I avoid such people like the plague they are. They're just walking balls of anger, spite and hatred and I don't want to be anywhere near any of them.

[Mnemosyne]

11. After Katrina, I never listened to their bullshit again. nt

[MisterP]

12. violence is either a spectator sport in America, or you always win

before 9-11 the biggest deliberate foreign incidents on US soil were Pancho Villa, Black Tom, and a fire balloon; Britain, France, Germany, Austria-Hungary, Russia--they each had a whole generation killed apiece in each world war; one-third of Poland was killed; even in distant Britain there are still people who remember shoveling human meat into a bag for disposal after the Blitz

after WWII the whole future-ware genre died off entirely in Europe: any future war there would be the last war; but in America things continued apace, the 50s full of tales of America beating out the Russkies or subjugated to them, 60s SF of Vietnam won or lost, 70s survivalism reassuring the suburbs that it won't be THAT bad when the Big One hits; now we even have foreign-invasion fantasies return as though it were 1880 again

[smirkymonkey]

14. Let Isobel's words drown out their ignorance.

They are so much more powerful and have so much more staying power.

[Skittles]

15. "you never think it will happen to you"

I've never understood why people say that

why WOULDN'T it happen to you?