Trump Says He Heroically Avoided Capture in Vietnam by Staying in U.S.

[Zorro]

AMES, IOWA (The Borowitz Report)—Presidential candidate Donald Trump revealed a little-known episode of personal heroism from his youth on Saturday, telling an Iowa audience that he narrowly avoided capture in Vietnam by remaining in the United States for the duration of the war.

“The Cong were after me,” Trump said, visibly stirred by the memory. “And then, just in the nick of time, I got my deferment.”

The former reality-show star said he had never shared his record as a war hero before because “I don’t like to boast.”

He said that he only disclosed the episode now because “the way this nation treats our deferment veterans is a disgrace.”

http://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-report/trump-says-he-heroically-avoided-capture-in-vietnam-by-staying-in-u-s

[Puzzledtraveller]

1. This is zero sum.

Mccain, Trump, who gives a shit about either one?

[tavernier]

2. Omg, hysterical!!

Borowitz hits a home run!

[Marie Marie]

3. Borowitz and Fugelsang:

Masters at "Nailed It!"

[Gothmog]

4. I love good satire