My bully and Mitt Romney

[bighughdiehl]

A few days ago when there was so much talk of Mitt Romney's
disgusting behavior in high school, I noticed one particular photo
of him from back then. The smirk on his face and his hairstyle
were exactly like that of someone who tortured me almost every day
for 5 years(grades 8-12, 1992-1996), and now suddenly I need
to get some of this off my chest. There was gum, tacks,tripping,
all kinds of taunting, trashing my belongings, and sexual abuse
(not involving penetration).

I can't even figure out why he singled me out. I was big, muscular,
heterosexual. However, I knew I could not retribute or come forward.
He was popular with both students and teachers,
he was good at making me look like the bad guy when
anyone was watching, he had no other victims that I knew of, and his dad
was a big shot(and now he's a big shot, too, there is no justice in this world).
To top it off, a lot of the things he did were too bizarre to even explain.
Oh, there's more, but I think I need to calm down for now. Anyone else have a
story to tell? I am contemplating sending this asshole a calm but lengthy message
on Facebook, doubt it will do any good, though.

[bighughdiehl]

1. Also....

Is there anything like a private forum (so posts would not show
up on Google searches, etc.)somewhere out there for people that were bullied?
Where I can meet other people from my school and we can name names?
I really wanna find out if this asshole had other victims.

[Fresh_Start]

2. I'm so sorry for what you suffered at his hands

but I wouldn't contact him if I were you.
Given his inclinations, why would you reward him with letting him know he's still able to get under your skin, or he still has influence over you?
Best revenge is living well.

[bighughdiehl]

3. Good point....

But it is still kind of hard to deal with him being much more successful than me.
He has a very good job and a hot wife, I got to have nothing partly because
of the effects from that shit and a couple other things.

[gratuitous]

4. My advice: Do NOT send him a Facebook message

It only lets him know he still has power over you, even 16 years later. And from your description, he probably hasn't developed the empathy and grace necessary to acknowledge his own misdeeds.

I will share one other little thing: A friend of mine was being beaten down in multiple areas of her life. She was, by all outward appearances, doing quite admirably, but circumstances had seemed to conspire against her to really push her to the edge. She was in counseling, and her therapist said, "So Jane (pseudonym), let's say you're in charge of the world, and you have a magic wand to change anything you want. What would you do?"

Jane worked through several scenarios of changing other people's attitudes and behaviors, but that didn't really solve the problem. She finally concluded that while she couldn't change the way other people conducted their lives (and, at bottom, she didn't want to change them), she could adjust how she reacted to those things. It was a long slog, and by no means error-free, but she eventually worked out a system where she let go of responsibility for other people's conduct.

[Warpy]

5. Don't send him that message.

If you do, he'll think he "won."

Our culture rewards bullies and sociopaths and punishes empathy. That's just the way things are, and it stinks.

[bighughdiehl]

6. I won't send that message....

wasn't easy to pull back.

[tabbycat31]

7. Write the message but do not send it

That is a good way for me to get things out there but not contact them.

It helped me big time when I realized that things were over between the last guy I dated and me. (Things did not end on good terms and it was definitely better than reading him the riot act at a statewide convention).