The tea party is about to lose their minds

[jmowreader]

You know the tea party has been screaming about FEMA camps being set up in Texas as part of a "government takeover" of that state.

Texas needs a lot of federal assistance to recover from the recent flooding, and part of that assistance will be a series of refugee camps to give the people who've been washed out of their homes a place to live while they're bailing their houses out.

Guess who runs those camps.

[onehandle]

1. Obama set up these floods just to launch the government takeover.

Now we can finally force Texas to be part of the United States!

[ProfessorGAC]

7. It's That Kenyan Rain Machine of His

I knew he couldn't be trusted

[jmowreader]

17. From what they tell me, the Kenyan Rain Machine still works...

so you'd think the heartless bastard, now that he's flooded Texas in preparation for taking away their guns, would ship it to the San Fernando Valley and flood California in preparation for taking away THEIR guns. But nooooooooo...you can't rely on him for nothing.

[Jamastiene]

30. Thanks, Obama.

Now, we can occupy Texas. Muahahhaha.

[freshwest]

40. You mean occupy Texas AGAIN... Hehehehe! Native Texan here! n/t

[jwirr]

9. And we already have the FEMA officials down there in place to run those camps. I can just here the

rwers line of reasoning. This gets worse everyday.

[Springslips]

35. Enter HARRP!

It is all connected; we are in the looking glass here people!

[RichGirl]

39. Actually....God set up flood...it's kind of his thing.

God's comment on twitter:

Ireland legalizes gay marriage and gets a rainbow.

Texas bans gay marriage and gets a flood.

TAKE A HINT, PEOPLE!

God @TheGoodGodAbove

[Human101948]

2. Obama and I have been waiting for this opportunity!

Take their guns and put them in the FEMA camps and institute Sharia Law!

[jmowreader]

4. Speaking of FEMA and guns...

I wonder how many people's guns were washed away in the flood.

[jwirr]

10. Probably a lot of them. Wonder if water damage makes a gun usless?

[jmowreader]

19. No, but there's a problem...

It's hard to parade around Texas with a rifle slung over your shoulder while wearing a tee-shirt with "come and take it" printed across the front, when your rifle is buried under two feet of mud.

And speaking of that little phrase...Let us say, for sake of saying, that I and a couple of my buddies are at one of Fort Worth's finer malls having a bite at the food court, buying new camouflage tee shirts and cargo pants, and discussing the merits of our new governor or his lack thereof. This is Texas and when in Texas do as the Texans do, so we're all carrying concealed pistols - because you never know, the girl at the food court might rob us by giving us thirteen cents' change instead of fourteen. All of a sudden my friend Cletus looks up and sees a gentleman who is a member of Open Carry Tarrant County walking around with an AR-15 slung over his left shoulder and a shirt with "COME AND TAKE IT" written under a picture of a cannon barrel emblazoned across the front. My friend Cooter mutters across his Dr. Pepper, "boys, that is a damn shame. Walking around a perfectly safe mall with a rifle, scaring the hell out of all these innocent little kids. That idiot probably can't hit the broad side of a barn with that damn thing. We really should do something about that." And like a flash, Cletus and Cooter jump out of their seats, draw their sidearms, and start screaming "HEY, OPEN CARRY DICKHEAD! PUT ALL YOUR FUCKING GUNS ON THE GROUND RIGHT NOW, DROP YOUR PANTS AROUND YOUR ANKLES AND HIT THE GROUND FACE DOWN! DO IT NOW!" He naturally does that. Cletus and Cooter pick up all the guy's guns out of the huge puddle of his own urine, shotgun the AR-15, put the guy's three pistols in a shopping bag and walk away. At Cletus and Cooter's subsequent trial for every crime the Tarrant County DA could think of, would "Your Honor, he was wearin' a shirt that said 'come and take it' on it, so we thought he wanted us to!" be sufficient defense?

[jwirr]

21. LOL

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

26. Wouldn't all that urine damage the guns?

You'd have to get them cleaned in a hurry.

[Voice for Peace]

31. I was hoping this was a true story, and also that you were there

thanks for nothing except a good laugh

[freshwest]

41. You have talent. I want to see more of this. n/t

[Jamastiene]

33. Or as one man in the grocery store the other day called it;

Sherry Law. Of course, I'm not in Texas, but right wingers are dumbasses no matter which state they are in. They aren't very bright.

[bunnies]

3. They can exercise their freedumb to sleep outside & starve if they so chose.

Im sure they dont want to be "takers" mooching off the government... right?

[lapfog_1]

5. yup. Obama caused the floods just to get people into those FEMA camps!

who knew he was so powerful!

This is all in preparation for the invasion of Texas by the US Government scheduled for later this summer... using Walmarts and a series of underground tunnels to grab people and put them in those FEMA camps for re-education (well, to be re-educated, wouldn't you first have to be educated? So maybe it is just "education&quot .

[jmowreader]

12. They just long for the days of the great and all-knowing Clenis!

The Clenis sees you when you're sleeping.
It knows when you're awake.
It knows when you've been bad or good.
So impeach him again, for goodness' sake!

[Va Lefty]

6. That happened a looong time ago

they will undoubtedly throw, what my Grandmother used to call, a "hissyfit."

[onecaliberal]

8. You know POTUS

ordered those floods. How else was he going to get those camps in there?

[Jester Messiah]

11. You can't lose what you never had. [nt]

[Scurrilous]

14. LOL

[fadedrose]

13. Our government went to a lot of expense

to get the state half-flooded, all because they want to put Texas in camps and take away their guns. The Tea Party has discovered the plot. I bet Cruz figured it out all by himself. Now what'll we do??

[jmowreader]

16. Flood the other half of the state, naturlich...

Look guys, it makes no sense at all to go to all the trouble and expense of creating a natural disaster just so we can grab some guns, and NOT finish the job.

[Arugula Latte]

15. FEMGHAZI!!

[Warpy]

18. Honey, that ship has sailed, long time ago

The FEMA refugee centers will be of short enough duration that the pig ignorant teabaggers won't put two and two together. They'll be in FEMA trailers on their own property soon enough, crabbing because they are so small.

You've got to have a mind in order to lose it.

[underpants]

20. As I have told several friends on Facebook...

If you are on the list (trust me you are probably on the list) and you get rounded up, do this. Find "Bob" in supply - every camp has a "Bob"- and drop my name. It won't get you out but it should get you a bigger bunk and linens cleaned at least twice a month. Okay?


BTW - that was stolen from someone here at DU but I can't remember who.

[displacedtexan]

22. Shhhhh! They told us this last June at our secret One World Order convention.

They laid out the whole plan about innocently taking over Texas during a man-made disaster scenario. While the locals were busy with sand bags and such, those of us enlightened former Texans would gather all of the gun toters into one place and give them sleeping drugs in their chili. Then, we would take all of their guns and make them live in forced labor camps, which we would model after those secret Scientology bunkers for the unfaithful.

Smirk.

[KamaAina]

23. Yo, jmow. 2007 called.

It wants its post back.

[truebluegreen]

24. "...about to...."?

[alphafemale]

25. You beat me by....seconds.

Like minds, my friend.

[truebluegreen]

38. ...

[packman]

27. For some reason I find the woes of Texas

and the mini-series on the Alamo airing almost on cue sort of like two stars aligning in the heavens rather interesting.. But that is probably just me.

[IronLionZion]

28. God hates Texas

God is clearly punishing Texas for not punishing its sinners enough.

The floods and the FEMA camps are all part of Obama's socialist plot. Other questions are:

how many people will show up for medical care without any insurance or Medicaid? Obama's fault

How many illegal immigrants are affected too?

The liberals in Austin obviously brought this biblical fury to their state, but why is it mainly affecting conservative areas of the state? Obama controls the weather

Yes, I know there are many good liberals and DUers from Texas, but why does God punish the whole state for their sins?

Juror: My entire post is Of course I know that real people died in this and it's nobody's fault. I'm poking the conservative bigots who blame the gays and immigrants and liberals for random natural disasters.

[Jamastiene]

29. What minds?

Those blobs of gray matter in their heads that they don't use?

[Half-Century Man]

32. My problem with your post.

You refer to the rampant insanity of the Tea Party in future tense.

[Voice for Peace]

34. This is so delightful. I wonder if they will be allowed to have guns in the camps?

Or if only the Guards will have the guns.

[JHB]

36. Considering the state of their minds...

...losing them might be an improvement.

[struggle4progress]

37. As VP Quayle so insightfully said, "What a waste it is to lose one's mind"

[freshwest]

42. Is the mandatory Obamaphone a smart phone? n/t

[jmowreader]

43. Its only a smart phone if the person using it is smart