General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsRW Evangelicals Attacking Divorce Laws Just Like Abortion. They Want To Put An End To Divorce.
The religious right is all about making divorce much more difficult and even illegal in the long run. Several states have already passed laws ordering counseling and other family service for couples seeking divorce who have children. And in some states waiting periods can be up to a year before a person can even file for divorce.
The family values crowd sees divorce just about as evil as abortion. They want to end it or put so many barriers to divorce as to make it almost impossible. They seek the same kind of laws against divorce that they are passing against abortion clinics and contraception.
In actuality they want convenient marriage to be the law of the land. And it is just another part of making this country a Christian nation.
Tightening and more restrictive divorce laws are under the radar.
Cassidy1
(300 posts)is put an end to bad marriage. People should be required to undergo rigorous counseling before marriage. There should be a standard program, by law, in each state. People would learn the basics of respect and the type of work that needs to go into a marriage. There should also be a separate requirement for having children. If people are from non-traditional families, then there would be a separate component for children in mixed families. Most people can't even handle kids and are clueless. Considering people marry later anyway, then up the legal marrying age to 21.
MrModerate
(9,753 posts)Have authorities so deeply involved in our personal lives. I'm all for education and resources being made available to people so marriages and family can be more successful, but what you propose is waaaay too intrusive.
Cassidy1
(300 posts)Divorce in this country costs A LOT of money. It drains society. It takes from other programs. Courts, child welfare programs, etc cost millions. I would rather see that paid by people getting married. It will make people more responsible. It's a small price to pay for each person rather than paying more in money and heartache later. People can divorce if they like, but you don't want bad marriages with children. The insurance against bad divorce is responsible people to begin with.
eShirl
(18,502 posts)Getting a divorce should be easier, not harder.
Divorce will also be less infrequent when people take marriage seriously. The only way to make them do this is with standardized programs. You're talking about saving a lot of money. Make marriage more serious. Divorce should not be a burden, but people won't file anyway when they're more serious about marriage.
I think people take marriage too lightly. They even tell me that life will be easier when they get married. Yeah right. You have to work at it.
lexington filly
(239 posts)was quite serious and committed to the marriage. What they were not committed to was misery, or---alcoholics who wouldn't seek recovery, being battered, going down the tubes because one partner refused to pull even part of the financial load, being emotionally abused, keeping kids in a terrible environment, etc. There are as many reasons why it's wise for one or both marriage partners to seek divorce as there are for getting married. It's best in my opinion for kids to have the love and attention from two healthy parents but when that isn't reality in a marriage, one healthy parent is better than kids living in an unstable and anguished household. Sometimes because a parent, or two, loves his/her children and values them is the precise reason to divorce. As a veteran of marriage counseling, it was helpful in airing problems but not in resolving them.
Cassidy1
(300 posts)Things change, sometimes for the worse. People become alcoholics. People lost their jobs long term and become violent. I've also however, seen many more people committed to the IDEA of marriage. The trouble though, is that is was THEIR idea of marriage. Basically, a fantasy. They were unrealistic about it. Even though there was no battering, alcoholism, etc. they were "unhappy" because of some vague lack of fulfillment that the partner did not provide.
I agree about people being able to get out of bad situations easily. If that is the case, then I don't much see the need for an intermediary. People could just live together. They could be married in a church without any government license. If you split up however, then you're on your own. I should not have to hear about how it did not work and your children. You foot the bill for any contractual obligation. If you're going to make it this legal institution however, then might as well make it practical and make it work.
I divorce thee
I divorce thee
I divorce thee
And on to the next temporary encounter
Cassidy1
(300 posts)Isn't that in some middle eastern countries?
1939
(1,683 posts)But only the man can do it.
treestar
(82,383 posts)It's only easy when there is no property and no children. Even then it brings out the worst in people.
So the idea of making marriage be harder has some merit. It's so easy to get married. And then a few years later, put society through a lot of crap trying to convince the world the person you promised to love forever is the worst person in the world.
Stargazer99
(2,598 posts)There comes a point of diminishing returns
Cassidy1
(300 posts)My abuse? No, not me. Or the people getting married and then divorced?
quaker bill
(8,224 posts)Is the notion that a "government" that is incapable of even passing a budget, or settling its own internal disputes, will somehow be able to run an effective program for marriage counseling. You need to say this stuff more slowly and think it through.
The probability is less than zero that government could ever be useful here. I am a career civil servant. We are no more likely to be in a good marriage, or know what one is, than anyone else.
surrealAmerican
(11,363 posts)There really is no way to prevent people "in love" from making bad decisions in their own personal lives. What we can do is make it easier for them to recover from their mistakes.
vankuria
(904 posts)and aren't allowed to divorce, they can still go there separate ways. Unless they plan on creating a law to make it illegal to move out on your spouse. And it would be completely unenforceable so the whole notion is absolutely ridiculous and a waste of time!
AlinPA
(15,071 posts)"standard program"!
JI7
(89,262 posts)so these are even more extremist than limbaugh ?
rpannier
(24,333 posts)rich people go to a different state and do it
BumRushDaShow
(129,362 posts)or Donald Trump or....
JI7
(89,262 posts)BumRushDaShow
(129,362 posts)along with McCain and his harem...
world wide wally
(21,753 posts)avebury
(10,952 posts)is to just not get married in the first place.
jmowreader
(50,562 posts)avebury
(10,952 posts)of slavery for women. I am not in anyway claiming that is the way most significant others would think. It is just the uber Christian conservatives overlords would be supremely happy if they could keep women barefoot, pregnant and at home.
My question to them would be - and just how does that make you different from the Islamic religion and the Taliban?
They might find that at some point their drive to subjugate women may result in women turning their backs no only on marriage but motherhood as well. Since there are some of those religious nuts who want to pass laws permitting rapists access to the reproductive result of their act and denying rape victims abortions, I am not that sure that the religious overlords would not turn to rape gangs to force women to bend to their will. The Handmaid's Tale may not be that far away.
silverweb
(16,402 posts)[font color="navy" face="Verdana"]They'll just love the results of a ban on divorce in the 21st Century: Even more unmarried cohabitation and more children born "out of wedlock." No getting around it.
There used to be a lot of social stigma attached to both of these, but I really don't think people are going to go back to that - however much the fundies might push to promote it.
I know one couple who've been together for decades, and have six children and multiple grandchildren. They have a stable, loving relationship and it's a delight to see them together all the time. They obviously enjoy each other's company and are always laughing together. But they never married.
Fundies just want to reinstate official male ownership of women as domestic property, baby machines, and household servants. They can live like that if they want to, but it won't take among the general population no matter what they try to impose in terms of laws.
avebury
(10,952 posts)"Religious Freedom laws."
I don't have to hire you because you are living in sin.
I don't have to rent you an apartment because you are living in sin.
I don't have to serve (or sell you _________ ) because you are living in sin.
The Religious Freedom laws are being used openly on birth control/abortion and LGBT but I doubt they will only use them for those 2 issues.
Response to TheMastersNemesis (Original post)
Warren DeMontague This message was self-deleted by its author.
Historic NY
(37,452 posts)cali
(114,904 posts)worrying about.
Not a chance in the world and repuke lawmakers are not trying to push this- those laws you refer to are common in blue states as well and they have been for quite some time. they are not related to repukes trying to make divorce harder.
Your op is nonsense. For instance, in VT, if not the most liberal state in the country, one of the 3 most liberal states, it's more difficult to get a divorce than in NH, which is decidedly more conservative in every way.
http://abcnews.go.com/Business/best-worst-states-divorce/story?id=14934693
In fact, some of the easiest states to get divorced in, are deep red states.
I think posting shit as if it was fact, without doing the requisite research is doing a disservice to the DU community.
safeinOhio
(32,714 posts)as in Mosaic Law.
treestar
(82,383 posts)Give up, RW Evangelicals.
The counseling for children may not be about preventing divorce but about preventing distress for children. Divorce brings out the worst in people. Their first instinct is to punish the other person using the children to do it. Too many people have done that, so domestic relations courts make mandatory classes to teach people how to deal with divorce without using their children.
PeaceNikki
(27,985 posts)There have been a handful of bills written, have any passed? This is not being attacked "just like abortion". Abortion is under serious threat, divorce is not. While I agree the bills are dangerous and increase domestic violence, this has not risen to the level that reproductive rights are being attacked. Not even close. It's important, sure, but make no mistake, women are directly being targeted in huge numbers and it's working.
http://www.guttmacher.org/media/inthenews/2015/01/05/
JTFrog
(14,274 posts)Kablooie
(18,638 posts)Plenty of weed and free sex for all, that's the American way, man.
surrealAmerican
(11,363 posts)... evangelicals have a higher rate of divorce than other groups? Why is it that they need the government to keep them from doing what they think is against their religion anyway?
Fumesucker
(45,851 posts)newfie11
(8,159 posts)Did we go through a space warp and pick up imbeciles from back then?
It seems every few weeks there is another demand that this country regress 200+ years or more, ESPECIALLY WHERE WOMEN ARE CONSIDERED!
Scuba
(53,475 posts)In fact, Senator Grothman is claiming that the very lack of two married opposite sex parents in a household constitutes child abuse.
LibertyLover
(4,788 posts)their right to divorce, no matter what the leaders say. That particular demographic has a whole lot of divorces under their collective belts.
Initech
(100,099 posts)leftyladyfrommo
(18,869 posts)I don't understand why anyone would want to be married in this day and age. Especially women.
brooklynite
(94,699 posts)...it's just as stupid as abortion restrictions, but at least now they're being consistent.
(nb - I think you meant "COVENANT" Marriage, not "CONVENIENT" Marriage)