General Discussion
Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region ForumsSide-By-Side Photo Shows Hypocrisy Of Suggesting Women Should Breastfeed In The Bathroom
Side-By-Side Photo Shows Hypocrisy Of Suggesting Women Should Breastfeed In The BathroomThe Huffington Post | By Caroline Bologna
Posted: 03/10/2015 3:44 pm EDT Updated: 03/10/2015 5:59 pm EDT
When Israeli photographer and mom Tamar Shugert saw 52Frames' "Make A Statement" photo challenge, she knew exactly which topic she wanted to cover for her entry: respect for breastfeeding mothers.
The mom-of-two (and soon-to-be three) told The Huffington Post that although she's never experienced disrespect several friends of hers have been asked to relocate to the bathroom when breastfeeding in public places.
Shugert submitted a side-by-side photo collage -- in one photo, she pretends to breastfeed in her bathroom, and in the other, her husband poses eating spaghetti in the same bathroom. The caption reads in part, "If you are not willing to eat your lunch in the bathroom, then don't expect me to feed my kid there!"...
...Still, the mom hopes viewers can agree with the photo's main message. "Women should not be asked to go feed their children in bathrooms," she said, adding. "Nobody wants to be eating in bathroom. I wouldn't breastfeed in a bathroom even if I was asked to."
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/03/10/tamar-shugert-breastfeeding-in-bathroom-photo_n_6816086.html?cps=gravity_1787_7707684930037032211
AnotherDreamWeaver
(2,850 posts)Liberal_in_LA
(44,397 posts)laundry_queen
(8,646 posts)pnwmom
(108,980 posts)Takket
(21,577 posts)Would ask a woman to breast feed in a bathroom? Bathrooms are meant to be a place to expell bacteria laden filth from our bodies. You sure as he'll don't want to eat in that environment!
Hekate
(90,714 posts)It's not like women take their entire tops off, or just whip out a breast and wave it around saying "Looky here, boys, here's a boob!"
40 years ago I breastfed my babies very modestly under a light blanket when we were out of the house. >smh< No one but another mother could even tell that's what baby was doing under there. We never had any problems, and no one ever complained.
haikugal
(6,476 posts)I got very disapproving looks and mutterings, I was told to nurse in the bathroom and I refused. I stared them down and ignored their prudish remarks. Like you I was very modest but some women, yes they were women, are just fucked up. I felt they were religious. I met women that said they could nurse a daughter but not a son...how messed up is that? This country is really fucked up.
I know a young mother who nurses her babies and she does it the same way I used to. I can't for the life of me think why anyone would object.
Hekate
(90,714 posts)Women -- or rather, their breasts, are used to sell stuff. (Have you seen the new Carl's Jr. ad? The one that gets shown on the Comedy Channel about the time Jon Stewart is on.)
The breast is commodified and sexualized out of all proportion. Sometimes nearly all the rest of the female model is cropped out of the picture in advertising.
Of course it's a secondary female sex characteristic, of course it signals fertility and is sexually attractive. I have no problem with that; it's part of the male-female interaction.
But breasts are there to feed babies. We give birth, they fill with milk. Breasts are not the exclusive visual property of the male world.
And you are right -- when even women get sucked into this twisted attitude, the country is effed up.
haikugal
(6,476 posts)I thought it was because only Hippys breastfed, right? Even my mother didn't want me to breastfeed, said it would ruin my breasts. There we go again...unbelievable that breast feeding women are subjected to this nonsense 40 years later...when will we grow up?!
Adrahil
(13,340 posts)But my wife breast fed our daughter (now almost 13). It was great for both of them, I think. No one ever SAID anything to my wife while nursing in public (see sought an out of the way place and used a light blanket cover), but she did receive a few hard glares which she returned, with interest!.
The sexual fetishization of breasts is the reason, of course. Instead of being something beautiful between mother and child, they have become "breasticles," sexual organs for the entertainment of sexual partners. Not that they can't be that, of course, but they also serve a pretty useful function!
The bathroom is NOT an appropriate place to feed a child. I do know of some places (like a local mall) that has a nursing lounge for women to use who want to use it, but should not be required.
CTyankee
(63,912 posts)A place where a woman could nurse comfortably and away from crowds. It should not be required; it should be an option and as convenient and comfortable for both mom and baby as possible. It would offer an option. But not for the sake of some BS "modesty" reasons.
kimmylavin
(2,284 posts)I would never tell another woman not to breastfeed in public, but I was just not comfortable doing it myself.
I usually took my baby & sat in the back seat of my car (tinted windows, lots of room, quiet) when I was out and about.
But I have to say that Disneyland has the absolute best setup I've ever seen.
There's a family station, where you can go & change your baby, heat up a bottle, or breastfeed.
The breastfeeding area is monitored by a woman who will only let mom & baby in, and it was so quiet & peaceful there - SUCH a nice experience.
I was so grateful, I actually wrote Disney a letter thanking them for thinking of us!
(And it's not an all-or-nothing proposition, either. Before I knew of the family station, I breastfed my daughter under a blanket by the Rivers of American. No biggie, but I was so happy to find the alternative...)
haikugal
(6,476 posts)Never! I welcome the inclusion of the male take on this, and I thank you! Kudos to your wife for standing up to the prudes.
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)I do think this is one area where there has been a sea change. Our kids are older now, but when my wife did it no one said "boo" or batted an eye.
haikugal
(6,476 posts)And it was California....I didn't expect it.
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)For the better, singificantly.
haikugal
(6,476 posts)However the OP suggests we haven't come very far...
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)But also women should know that establishments can't make them shunt off to the bathroom, at least not in most states.
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)I'm not disagreeing with your underlying point, however, most states now have laws that PROTECT the right to nurse in public. When my kids were breastfed that was the case, and that was a while ago. Admittedly we were in a progressive part of the US, but even then we knew that if someone suggested "cover up" they, not my wife, were breaking the law.
And that's why it's important, I think, to correct the erroneous assertion in your post that laws against public nursing are commonplace, at least in this country. Women should know that their right to breastfeed publicly is protected in most states (see below)- and if someone of authority in an establishment "suggests" they "take it to the bathroom", the establishment is likely, again, breaking the law.
Also, while modestly breastfeeding under a blanket may be how some choose to do it, many babies don't want to eat under a blanket (do you?) and certainly "modestly covering up" is not required either.
http://www.ncsl.org/research/health/breastfeeding-state-laws.aspx
haikugal
(6,476 posts)Welcome information on all accounts. As you know a baby can be very enthusiastic about nursing and you make a great point about eating under a blanket, lol. I used the blanket for the 'delicate pearl clutchers' so they didn't faint at the sight of a breast with a baby attached. My son and I were perfectly happy together.
I'm very happy to learn that breastfeeding is protected. Odd that it would have to be.
Warren DeMontague
(80,708 posts)And like i said, back when our kids were still nursing no one ever batted an eye.
SunSeeker
(51,574 posts)niyad
(113,344 posts)niyad
(113,344 posts)Mammary Glands
(Kristin Lems)
January 15, 2005
words and music by Kristin Lems c 2005 -
Mammary glands - wo wo!
Mother nature's dairy delight
You can't make cream or butter
cause it's just a human udder
And a natural mammalian sight.
Do you wanna pay to take a peek
At what drives men insane'
Well they're in anthro books galore
and I'm Just sure that you'll adore 'em,
Even cave women have the same
two simple...
The men decided that a certain shape
Stands out more than the rest
Well they made such a major issue
Women stuff their bras with tissue,
Thrust shoulders back to look their best,
show off their...
If you're more than 36, you are desirable
So don't be shy, they'll pay
For once you finally sold out,
you may get a center foldout T
hey dig your dugs, you're on the way,
with famous...
It's a multimillion dollar enterprise
But no one know what it's about
If we'd think before we'd buy it
We'd bust the myth, we would defy it
And we might stand up and shout,
'They're only...'
http://www.kristinlems.com/
Initech
(100,081 posts)I do however have a serious problem with public diaper changes. Leave poop in the designated poop areas please.
valerief
(53,235 posts)NickB79
(19,253 posts)I've seen parents change diapers on tables in restaurants!
And since we had a baby of our own at the time, we knew damn well those restaurants had changing stations in the bathrooms.
Initech
(100,081 posts)If there's one place I never want to see those fluids, it's at the dinner table.
NickB79
(19,253 posts)Whatever helps you sleep at night
valerief
(53,235 posts)It just makes sense to the "Go to the shitter" assholes.
SheilaT
(23,156 posts)sometimes to my husband's consternation, I nurse whenever and wherever. I was NEVER asked to go into a public bathroom to nurse, and I certainly wouldn't have. And I never covered up the baby with a blanket, either. If someone didn't want to see me nursing, they could just look in some other direction.
Enthusiast
(50,983 posts)FourScore
(9,704 posts)Orrex
(63,216 posts)Last edited Mon Mar 16, 2015, 10:57 PM - Edit history (1)
I've known quite a few guys who would have thouht nothing of eating in a bathroom, so I'm afraid that the message might be lost on them.
Still, k/r!