A preparedness question--

[Jackpine Radical]

How many of you actually own pitchforks? How many have the makings for torches? (A stick of wood, a rag, some flammable liquid like kerosene).

[TexasProgresive]

1. I have that stuff but I'd rather use this

[Jackpine Radical]

3. A good ol' brush hook.

A downright Medieval-looking weapon ya got there, Binky.

That'll pass.

[snooper2]

2. plan on taking a capitol building down or something

[femmocrat]

4. I have those things.

Will I be needing them any time soon? I don't think I could shovel my way to the barn to get them right now.

[Jackpine Radical]

7. Nah. Winter's never a good time to start a revolution.

[PoliticAverse]

5. I've got a manure fork, does that count?... n/t

[Jackpine Radical]

6. Hell yeah.

Especially if you take it straight from the barn to the barricade. Anybody you stick with that thing is gonna get a helluvan infection, like with the old punji stakes in Vietnam.

[2naSalit]

8. Got all that

and then some...

And I'd tell you what they are but I like the element of surprise, tends to work in my favor.

[Runningdawg]

11. Ditto

[Agnosticsherbet]

9. I have a small garden rake.

Do you need gardeners?

[Jackpine Radical]

13. Of COURSE we need gardeners.

What would be the point of the whole thing if we didn't have gardeners?

[braddy]

10. Why would a prepper need a fire torch? a prepper needs real lighting.

[Jackpine Radical]

14. You have to respect Tradition.

You show up outside the local gated community with a weed whacker in one hand & one of those wimpy LED lights in the other, and they're gonna laugh at you.

[braddy]

29. I'm so distracted today, that I thought it was a prepper question.

[ChosenUnWisely]

12. I do and a whole bunch of other things, one should be prepared for all eventualities.

Either that or be a victim, we do have that choice in life.

[kydo]

15. I do. And I have a knive too.

[NuclearDem]

16. I have a shovel.

[Jackpine Radical]

17. OK, You're on the cleanup squad.

[NuclearDem]

30. Great, so just a Rake Echelon Motherfucker then.

[Jackpine Radical]

36. REMF!

[ChosenUnWisely]

18. I have a pitchfork and a potatofork so I will bring both just in case

someone does not have one.

But if we are storming the gated community's chainsaws would be better and more fun, just sayin!

[2naSalit]

41. A few

M80s might be in order if we encounter a brick wall...

[ChosenUnWisely]

45. Leave the M-80's at home it will drown out the screams of the 1%

[2naSalit]

48. Whoa!! Didn't think about that...

Good point!

[jwirr]

19. No pitchfork but I could manage a torch.

[HappyMe]

20. Hmm...apartment living doesn't call for pitchforks.

There is a metal snow shovel in the hall, and I could fashion a torch out of what we have available.

I also have a Swiss Army knife, a small Leatherman and a couple of fierce kitchen knives.

[Jackpine Radical]

22. I think it's the spirit of the thing that counts.

You can also use the blade of the snow shovel as body armor against tasers.

[HappyMe]

24. I'm in!

I like the armor idea.

[ChosenUnWisely]

25. A 8" or 9" Chefs Knife is a good weapon as is a filet knife. Bring the cleaver if you got one too

[HappyMe]

27. No cleaver.

I like to cook, but I don't tend to cook things that I need to go to war with first.

[ChosenUnWisely]

39. I cook myself a cleaver is handy for chopping bones as is a clean hack saw

Asian cleavers in an experienced hand is amazing to watch

I make own demi glaze and obtain bones direct from the slaughter house along with critter, primals and sub-primals. I prefer to cut my own critter and buying an entire cow is a bit too much food for my household for a year.

[Ykcutnek]

21. I'm not a violent person.

In a situation like that, I'd remain neutral until time revealed who was winning such a conflict... then choose my side accordingly.

[Jackpine Radical]

23. Yes, but you still need a torch & pitchfork in case the rebels win.

Then you have the props you need to slip out amongst them & pretend you were there since the beginning.

[HappyMe]

26. A small spritz bottle filled with water would help.

If you give your face and shirt a quick spritz, it would give the impression of the sweat of battle.

[Jackpine Radical]

28. Great point.

Soot smears on the face are always impressive too.

[SamKnause]

31. I have 1 pitch fork,

1 pickaxe, 2 axes, 1 hatchet , 1 metal claw rake, 1 shovel, 2 acres of wood for making torches, my closet is filled with rags, and my truck and gas cans are full.

I also have 368 No. 4 rebar rods 5 feet long.

Why do you ask ????

[Pathwalker]

32. Pitchforks, rakes, shovels, a hoori-hoori knife, scythe,

wheelbarrows, other assorted tools, actual tiki torches, weaponry, several grills and a chimarea. Are you planning a snipe hunt?

[Jackpine Radical]

50. I used to love snipe hunts.

When I was a kid, a couple of really pesky younger cousins, city kids, would come up to visit us in the north woods during the summer. I would always get stuck with babysitting them. In order to get myself some free time, I would take them snipe hunting, positioning them somewhere on an old logging trail or a similar spot, and then leave them. This worked a few times before their father figured out what I was doing.

[seveneyes]

33. A Sling Blade and Biscuits with flammable Mustard

I reckon that will be good enough.

[HappyMe]

35. Now it's a party.

[2naSalit]

42. OhYeah!!!

Invite me!! Invite Me!!!

I'll promise to share my pound of pyrodex and a half case of wiffle balls and fire crackers!

[2naSalit]

49. and some matches!

[matt819]

37. Excellent question

I have several.

One plastic - not much use in tar and feathering. But pretty good for its intended purpose, picking up manure. I'd probably do more mucking if I more actively thought of the horse shit as republicans.

One sort of flexible metal. Don't know whether this would be helpful. I'd probably end up burning myself.

Then I have one nasty looking tool, forged steel, four prongs. Ideal for tar and feathering.

So the question is, who are we tar and feathering?

[Jackpine Radical]

38. Nominations are still being accepted.

"So the question is, who are we tar and feathering?
"

[Jamastiene]

40. I lost my pitchfork when we moved.

It's fucked up, really. I had a pitchfork when I lived in the city limits, but lost it when I moved out of the city.

It wouldn't work where I live now anyhow. The red clay here is so hard that it actually bent my shovel when I tried to plant a tiny baby azalea. I ended up having to use rock shards to dig a hole to plant it. I loved that shovel.

I do have a pick axe now, though. When it comes to preparedness, I'm ready for the zombie apocalypse AND/OR revolution. To be honest, both things would be a godsend when it comes to saving America from the greedy predators who have been pillaging, plundering, and using America to line their own damn pockets for so long.

I actually think I would do better during a zombie apocalypse, because damn the rules, then, you just gotta survive any way you can or feel what Ronald Poppo felt. I don't want to feel that. That's just too freaky. I would rather do some unthinkable stuff than feel that. It's not just the physical that he had to go through. The trauma of being cannibalized while he was still alive has to weigh heavy on his mind. That was just fucked up. A George Romero zombie looks like Santa Clause compared to what Rudy Eugene did.

So, between revolution where we are just all so mad and can't take it any more and a full fledged zombie apocalypse, I think the zombie apocalypse would be more fun. With a revolution, we'd have to be all ethical and shit and I get tired of trying to be good when a big part of me wants revenge rather than justice at this point.

[bravenak]

56. I second this idea.

Zombie Apocalypses are my sort of thing too. I have planned out all sorts of things to survive. Involves stealing alot, but hey, gotta eat to live.

[Jamastiene]

60. Exactly.

I already have my eyes on the first Walmart/Lowes shopping center I find. My hometown used to have a Walmart and Lowes side by side. It would have made the perfect compound. Using the wood and hardware from Lowes for fortifications and the stock room and gun supply at the Walmart, a person could survive for a good long while. The biggest threat doing it that way would end up being from other humans who want to loot the Walmart for the potato chips and booze. Hell, I'd set that stuff up outside for them to loot all they want (except the vodka, I would keep that "for medicinal purposes" like my grandmother always said about her wine) and keep the canned goods, guns, ammo, and fishing gear. I would set up a mini-fortification in the camping/gun/fishing section and use the hardware section to build a super backpack that would hold as much ammo and supplies as possible and still evenly distribute the weight so it wouldn't feel quite so heavy. If I could find a decent vehicle in the auto section, I would have to try to come up with a way to weld some chainsaws to the centers of the hubcaps and remote controlled gun trigger pullers to the hood and trunk (or tailgate).

I would love to win a "raid Walmart and have fun for a night" type contest. There wouldn't be any duct tape left on the rolls or tools left unopened. I'd have a field day.

[ChosenUnWisely]

62. Stealing stuff is an ok plan, what you do is find out where the preppers are stashing their stuff

and go steal it. Most are not very bright and most are so paranoid of the gov coming and taking their guns that quite a few have decided to bury, guns. ammo and supplies either on their property of in wood close to their property. Be careful some are smart enough to put bobbie traps on their stash too.

I found a preppers stash once, mostly food at the time so I took it all and donated it to the food bank. They were stupid enough to put their stash on public land so I figured the public deserved the food.

Perhaps after the snow melt they will find out their food was donated, I was kind and left a note thanking them for the donation.

[bravenak]

70. One of my friends says he knows a guy who has a whole set up.

Solar panels and everything. He says its sad he might have to kill the guy to take his place. Only if the guy don't feel like sharing though. Too bad he told me where it us. Gonna be a whole lot more sharing.
We plan on taking over a costco or sams club. And stealing a uhaul and a RV. And eating moose and caribou. Plenty of space. I expect many of you all to come up when you realize that freezing temps make zombies lock up and fall on the ground, easy to kill.

Goon on you donating that food! Finders keeper loosers weepers!

[HereSince1628]

65. I was taught pitch forks aren't for digging they are for pitching hay

or these days, with a many tined fork sifting road-apples out of sawdust...

This is a garden fork...meant for digging/prepping planting beds strong wide tines, short stout handle with a grip. Not saying that it couldn't be a weapon in an uprising, but the short-handle could be a disadvantage.




The following is one of the variations on a pitch fork, usually associated with civil unrest...notice the tines are thin, too thin for digging, notice long handle with no grip...though the long handle isn't usually long enough to keep you out of range of sheriff's bullets this particular version -IS- available at WalMart. In times of unrest, accessibiliy should count for something!

[Jamastiene]

86. I was planning to use my pitchfork to turn my compost pile that never ended up

happening at my new place, for multiple reasons, the pitchfork being the least of my worries, lol. I lost my pitchfork somehow between the last place and moving here. My shovel was what I was digging with. It got bent really bad in this red clay.

[Earth_First]

43. Zombie, Political or NCAA preparedness? nt

[Hassin Bin Sober]

44. I have a cordless sawzall and a claw hammer.

[malaise]

47. Sarah Palin has a

'for(uc)ked' high pitch voice that spews so much crap that it would make anyone revolt -does that count?

[Blue_In_AK]

51. I actually do have a pitchfork.

I use it to turn my compost. Firewood? Check. Lighter fluid? Check. Yep, I think we're prepared.

[csziggy]

52. ME! I've got several pitchforks, rags, and flammable stuff

The only thing I'm lacking are glass jars to put the flammable stuff into - unless I sacrifice my canning jars.

[Jackpine Radical]

54. Are you suggesting a Mazel Tov cocktail?

[csziggy]

55. Oh - I missed the stick part! No, not seriously suggesting anything

Mazel Tov!

[LiberalElite]

53. I think I have one of these stuffed in the back of a kitchen drawer -

?c=2

[kentauros]

57. Don't have a pitchfork

but do have a turning fork:





I know, some call it a "spading fork" but it was always a "turning fork" growing up, so that's what I'll carry. Plus, it's got some heft to it, unlike a pitchfork

[Laffy Kat]

58. I have a long-handled pooper-scooper.

Both cat and dog models. Will those work?

[Jackpine Radical]

59. You can use those things sorta like a sling

to add a little range when you're flinging…well, you know. So yeah, they could be useful in certain kinds of psychological warfare operation.

[ChosenUnWisely]

63. Get a Wrist Rocket, very powerful and easy to use!

Use ball bearings for ammo

http://www.sausa.com/product.php?product_pk1=6

[Jackpine Radical]

69. I was thinking of softer projectiles.

[F4lconF16]

61. Sadly, I'm still amassing my collection.

All I've got now is a hack saw, a ludicrously high-powered drill and enough rubbing alcohol to blow up my porch (as I found out on accident earlier this year), but I can get creative

[irisblue]

64. Gotta go get a pitchfork

got shovels, several 3 foot wood stakes (tomatoes) gas for the lawn mower. When do we meet up?

[blackcrow]

66. pitchfork

I have a pitchfork. They are excellent for digging up hard ground, much better than a shovel. Every gardener should have one.

[ladyVet]

67. Maybe I do.

Why are you asking?

::::casts suspicious look at crazy radical guy::::

[Inkfreak]

68. I have an app for that. (nt)

[pinboy3niner]

71. Oh fudge! All I have is this...

[Jackpine Radical]

72. Looks like it would be a bitch to drag around.

Maybe we could ditch the 106RR & mount it on a Mule.

http://i.ebayimg.com/00/s/NDIzWDYwMA==/$T2eC16VHJF4FFkjBlI+rBR6uOwv81g~~60_35.JPG

[HappyMe]

73. Something you picked up at a garage sale?

[pinboy3niner]

75. I got a cut-rate price

[HappyMe]

77. lol!

You're a sharp guy for being able to slash the price like that.

[pinboy3niner]

82. I like to stay a head of the other bargain choppers

[Vattel]

74. I have a nasty milk frother for my lattes.

[HappyMe]

78. You will have to have coffee ready in the a.m. then.

[olddots]

76. I am a music torture specialist .

Yep I own a Nancy Sinatra CD .

[Jackpine Radical]

81. These boots are gonna walk all over you

for even mentioning that name.

[annabanana]

79. Well.. only a creme bruler torch, but I DO have

a real pitchfork. It's kind of rusty and the top of the handle is busted..

[fredamae]

80. I have a Peavey..with that work? n/t

[Jackpine Radical]

83. I dunno.

Other than breaking up log jams & stuff like that, what can you do with it?

Well, maybe you can use it to roll the shortened bodies off Pinboy's little gadget. The two of you could be a trevelling team, maybe.

[fredamae]

84. lol :) n/t

[KT2000]

85. bamboo rake and Bic lighter!