We’re glad we chose to be mothers in our teens

[AngryAmish]

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/jan/10/were-glad-we-chose-to-be-mothers-in-our-teens
Lucy was 17 when she got pregnant. What’s your reaction to that sentence? Go on, be honest. Possibly – probably, even – it was similar to the reaction of Lucy’s doctor. “Unfortunately, Lucy is pregnant,” he wrote in the letter of referral to the midwives. Lucy never forgot how she felt when she saw that letter: it was her moment of realisation about how she would be viewed from now on. “I was surprised people were so disapproving. This was 1998 and I thought it would be no big deal.”

[Brickbat]

1. I have a couple of friends who got pregnant in their teens, both of whom married the father and

ended up keeping their babies. It was hard, hard work for them to get through college, but now that the tough years are over, their own kids are setting out and my friends are in the prime of their lives -- without kids. Neither relationship lasted; both women are divorced and on their second marriages, but both are very happy, their kids are great, and they're actually on good terms with their exes. n = 2 is not data, but it's important to keep in mind that it's not the end of the world -- as long as the girls have the support they need.

[Butterbean]

2. Teen moms can be great mothers.

I've seen teen moms rise to the occasion and do beautifully. If given support and encouragement, teen moms can be great moms.

[Arkansas Granny]

3. Times change. I was in high school in the mid 60's.

I knew several girls who got married between junior and senior years (legal at 16 with parental consent, IIRC). Several of them were mothers within a year. It was fairly common.

[LWolf]

4. I was a teenage mother,

and I wouldn't recommend it to anyone.

My sons turned out okay. We're close; we have perhaps the closest parent/children relationship I've ever witnessed. They are fine men, and have forgiven me for everything I didn't know about parenting. Probably because the best thing I had going for me was a broad, deep, never-ending well of unconditional love for them, which got us through the tough times.

It's not always a disaster, but it's certainly not ideal, either.

[starroute]

5. I remember in my senior year of high school ...

The small group of us who were Merit Scholarship finalists were waiting around for something or other and I asked another girl who I didn't know particularly where she was going to college. "I'm not going to college," she said. "I'm getting married right after graduation."

I couldn't believe it. I thought she was joking. But she insisted it was true.

I simply couldn't get my head around that. I know I wasn't anywhere near being ready to get married, and neither were any of my friends. And why would a Merit finalist of all people want to get married right out of high school instead of going to college? What kind of a life did she foresee for herself?

I'm still not sure I can make any sense of it. But I guess everybody's got their own expectations.