Should a child be told that Santa is real?

[edhopper]

Very young children probably can't distinguish between real and make believer. But when they are old enough to ask if Santa is real, should they be lied to?

[Gman]

1. They will find out soon enough

Kids at school will tell them. For now let them enjoy it as long as they can.

[Liberal_in_LA]

170. friends kid was 8 years old, hadn't figured it out yet. kids at school were teasing her,

she was getting confused. I think the mom should have told her at that point.

[Gman]

171. Yup, that is the point you tell them

If anything so they don't get teased. I think my daughter was around 8 when she found out. Kids were reading her too. She's 23 now. No lasting effects!

[Socal31]

2. Or a fairy trades currency for teeth?

Or a man put every animal on a big boat and they all lived in harmony?

The answer is the same I believe.

If you have to exploit the under-developed brain of the person consuming whatever you are selling from a position of trust.....

[MillennialDem]

70. It's hard for me to remember (25-30 years ago when I was losing baby teeth) but I don't think I

ever believed the tooth fairy was real, even though my parents did have me put teeth in a plastic bag under my pillow. I think I believed Santa was though.

[LanternWaste]

182. Seems we often accept and rationalize the imaginary as real when it suits us...

Or that national borders are imaginary? Or this thing we call economics exists nowhere but our own imaginations? "The answer is the same I believe..."

Seems we often accept and rationalize the imaginary as real when it suits us-- regardless of whether one believes that to be exploitation or not.

[edhopper]

186. There is really nothing similar about those things and Santa

Borders aren't imaginary, and no one ever things their are real lines drawn on the ground. They are agreed upon concepts that allow us to work within mutual criteria.

[hrmjustin]

3. Great question and I think it really depends on the child and situation.

[ScreamingMeemie]

4. I don't think a belief or disbelief in Santa is going to really change the course of a child's life

as he grows to adulthood.

With my own kids, I found that by the time they asked if Santa was real, they already knew the answer.

I look at the Santa thing as a fun family thing that people can choose to partake in or not. No bigs.

[immoderate]

21. Good point. The answer could be "what do you think?"

--imm

[840high]

134. ....

[Douglas Carpenter]

5. some people who take the approach of telling them upfront that Santa is make believe the same

way mother goose or some other fairy tale character is make believe.

[Nay]

122. That's what we did with our son. But we did tell him that other kids had

parents who told them he was real, and not to tell them the truth and hurt their feelings. It worked out fine.

[FiveGoodMen]

6. No. I just prepares them to believe other bullshit later.

My parents never told me Santa was real because they were afraid that when I found out they lied about that, I'd stop believing in Jesus, too.

Backfired.

Now, when everyone looks at me and says "we all believe in God, how can you disbelieve" I can simply look back to those years when ALL my friends believed in Santa and I knew better.

[merrily]

46. As to Santa, you knew different from your peers. Whether you knew "better" is complicated.

As for me, I have absolutely no doubt that the spirit of Santa is very real and bring a lot of joy to a lot of people of all ages, no matter who does the physical task of filling your stocking!

[ChazII]

78. The reverse happened to me.

I did not decorate the house except for a tree with lights and a red tree skirt. Santa was never discussed and I never took my son to see Santa. Then when he was 7 he wanted to go see Santa. From then on my son was in charge of decorations. He knew Santa was not real but I think he enjoyed the feelings that come with this holiday.

[deurbano]

188. I did the opposite. Let them believe in Santa while they could..

but never told them God was real.

My older daughter was an only child for her first 25 years, so we kept doing "Santa" with her until her baby brother arrived. (We also do Lunar New Year stuff we don't actually "believe"... Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny... anything with celebration or presents in it.) To me, these are fun (and sometimes even meaningful) cultural traditions.

[alphafemale]

7. If they outright ask they have had doubts for awhile. Tell the truth.

Playing along is different than a blatant lie.

Most kids then play along for younger siblings if it is handled right.

[merrily]

50. I asked because my spoilsport of an older cousin told me and I desperately

wanted my parents to assure me that Santa was indeed real, while at the same time, not wanting to seem unsophisticated, just in case my cousin was right.

I think that's how most kids find out about Santa. Some kid around their own age or a bit older who has found out tells them. And I think most kids would rather have found out later rather than sooner!

[alphafemale]

68. That Noah thing?

Yeah that's real too.

Wait.

You wanted to be lied to?

[merrily]

138. Thanks for the gratuitous, condescending sarcasm--and on a Santa thread, of all places.

Up your chimney.

[raccoon]

111. Not this one.

And I think most kids would rather have found out later rather than sooner!

[Laughing Mirror]

8. When Santa is unable to put presents under the tree

Some kids find out on their own.

[ScreamingMeemie]

10. .

You are so right.

[alphafemale]

17. That's one of the cruel things.

It would be impossible to get away from the Santa will visit you if you are good myth.

He might even give you a Lexus!

[merrily]

48. True, which is why so many contribute very gladly to toy drives this time of year.

[Laughing Mirror]

144. Yes, charity, always the solution

People giving whatever they don't want or don't need, which may not necessarily be the same as what the child asks Santa for.

A toy and a Bible for you, son.

[merrily]

145. Where did I say that charity is always the solution?

BTW, most toy drives request and receive brand new, unopened toys and/or money. With all the loons these days, it's not safe to do anything else. And, of course, bibles are not appropriate donations to toy drives.

I guess Santa brings out the best in some people, while inspiring others to go out of their way to be nasty for no good reason.

Have a good night.

[Laughing Mirror]

146. Make sure you get that receipt for such generosity

to write off on your taxes. Merry Christmas!

[merrily]

147. As I said in my prior post....

[ProfessorGAC]

181. How Bitter

Geez, what fun you must be.

[Xipe Totec]

9. Yes. I think it's part of the learning process. Teaches them that adults can lie.

I think that when children discover on their own that people can lie, it develops a healthy skepticism. It teaches them to trust their own judgment.

[edhopper]

12. You mean

they should be lied to when they ask?

[Xipe Totec]

27. That's oversimplifying it, but yes

[edhopper]

31. That's interesting

teachng children to distrust their parents. I thought we just wait until they are teens for that.
New one for me.

[Xipe Totec]

34. Teach them to distrust authority. To question authority.

Don't teach them that things are true just because you say so.

That's only teaching them to be good Republicans.

[Renew Deal]

152. They aren't taught that in their teens.

They learn it.

[ZombieHorde]

79. I feel the same way.

Santa teaches kids to question authority.

[steve2470]

11. I told my son pretty early, the truth

I feel guilty that maybe I was a bit too early, but yea, I don't lie to my son. Ever. About anything, period.

[Lint Head]

13. There are some who say you should never delusion your children.

I loved Christmas as a child. All the anticipation waiting for that special morning. I think people should decide for themselves. When my children asked if Santa was real I told them that as long as they had people who loved them that Santa was real.

[edhopper]

16. What does that mean?

did they understand the metaphor? Or did they think you were saying the guy in the red suit at the north pole was real?

[Lint Head]

57. Very young children do not understand the metaphor concept.

When they became they became old enough they understood.

[edhopper]

59. So when they are old enough to ask

we shouldn't lie to them? But explain Santa in a different way?

[Lint Head]

84. Life is not that simplistic and everyone must decide for themselves.

"Explaining Santa in a different way?" You could look at it that way. I think it's a kinder way of saying Santa is a concept and not a real person. Other than Saint Nicholas. Who actually existed. When a child gets older they eventually realize Santa isn't real. My experience is that it empowers rather than disappoints for them to figure it out. It says to them, "You can't fool me." Also, it's Santa Claus. It not really a serious subject. No one ever massacred people shouting, "They lied to me! They said there WAS a Santa Claus!"

[edhopper]

85. Thanks

[vankuria]

98. Good explanation!

At some point kids figure it out on their own.

[VanillaRhapsody]

102. I have a friend who "never allowed her kids not to believe in Santa"

she told them the moment they don't believe in Santa....no more gifts....

Which is why she has a picture of her teenage boys sitting on Santa's lap...they must have wanted something really good that year....

....no one is allowed to say Santa isn't real to her!

It was quite funny....

[LiberalElite]

14. play along for a while

they'll figure it out eventually. My brother found out when he opened the bathroom door late Christmas eve and found my mother and me assembling his bike.

[avebury]

15. No.

If they are old enough to ask, they are old enough to know the truth. There might have been a St. Nicholas at one point but to sell the party line that Santa lives at the North Pole and somehow managedsto drive a sleigh full of toys pulled by reindeer around the world in one night is an absurd story to say the least.

Side note - Kids are told about Santa Claus, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, all roles filled by Mom and Dad. It is amazing that the uber Christians have not figured out that if you continue to teach children about all these imaginary creatures that there might come a time when kids might look at God as an imaginary entity.

[frogmarch]

18. No, they shoudn't be told that Santa is real.

If they ask if he is, they should be told the truth straight out and not fed the "Yes, Virginia..." malarkey.

[ladjf]

19. If the child asks the question, the answer should be no. nt

[etherealtruth]

20. I won't say what an other parent SHOULD do in this situation

I can only state what I have done as a parent ..... I have three kids and we did use the Santa fantasy ( I didn't see the problem with bringing a little fantasy into our lives). My rule (in my mind for my family) was to tell them the truth when asked .... I explained it that Santa was really a mindset .... it was about anticipation, giving and happiness and it symbolism was a husky bearded guy in a red suit.

I must say that I ended up having to TELL my oldest child that SANTA (as a human man) was simply a fantasy .... I can't remember exactly how old he was, but I grew concerned that he was a little old and might be "picked on" by other kids if he persisted in his belief.

To this day my kids (aged 18 through 32) believe in the "spirit" of Santa .... just not the physical embodiment. We are OK with it. My beliefs are that parents need to do whatever they feel is best for their children and families.

[jeff47]

22. If they're asking, they already know the answer

So tell them no, and explain why we continue the myth - it's a metaphor that little kids can't understand, so we describe it as a man in a red suit.

[Prophet 451]

23. Why not? We tell them heaps of lies anyway

If we raise kids to believe in lies like "democracy works", "police keep people safe", "justice is blind", who shouldn't they be given a comforting lie? I think it's probably harmless.

[Nevernose]

24. There are good reasons to continue the Santa falsity

From a purely pragmatic paradigm, it lessened the "I want this, I want that."

More importantly, it made giving presents to my kid about making my kid happy, not trying to win her love.

She's not screwed up for life, she's quite happy, and it made it easier to explain my atheism when she got older.

[MiniMe]

25. My neighbors are going through this now

The older son figured it out a few years ago, but the younger son still believes. They keep questioning the older boy to see if the younger boy still really believes. So far, he does (they think). They won't lie to him if he questions it, but they aren't going to tell him unless he asks. I think I would handle it the same way. Let them believe, it isn't hurting anything. But if they ask, be honest.

[ScreamingMeemie]

33. What my father did...

My older brother, at a relatively young age, caught "Santa" in the form of my parents putting stuff under the tree when he got up to go to the bathroom. My dad didn't make anything up (like,"Ohhhh, Santa's on a busy schedule, so he just dropped it off" or something) and so, my brother knew at 6-ish, I think.

Fast forward a couple of years. My other older brother was on the edge of not believing at the age of 8, and my previously mentioned older brother was pestering my parents every year to "let me help wrap" (which is code for "I want to know what everyone's getting!&quot

This was a year in which we went "home" (Milwaukee, WI) for the holidays and left a few days before Christmas. On the Sunday before we were due to leave, we were piling into the car to go to church, and my mother said,"hang on, I forgot my purse!" We all sat in the car while she ran in and grabbed it. Only she didn't. My father had told her to go in and quickly throw the presents under the tree and put out the stockings. When we returned home, we found out that "Santa had come while we were at church!" Oh my gosh, we were amazed! Even my oldest brother couldn't figure it out because little kids don't make connections. Seriously, I totally believed. And it was all because my dad was sick of my brother asking to "help." That's what he says anyway.

Keep in mind, this is also the guy who pulled up next to a dead rabbit on a ride through the Blue Ridge Mountains one Spring and said,"Hey look kids! It's the Easter Bunny!"

Anyway, I've grown up to be an honest and somewhat normal person.

[MerryBlooms]

66. What a great memory- thanks for sharing. Heartwarming. n/t

[tularetom]

26. Well, he is

Oops, my bad. I gotta start reading these post titles more carefully.

[Nye Bevan]

28. Believing in Santa was one of the most fun and magical things in my childhood.

And yes, my parents lied outright to me, and I was and am totally fine with it, because it was so much fun. And yes, I lied outright to my own kids, and they too were fine with it, and I'm sure they will lie to their kids. I feel bad for the kids of the humorless "kids should never be lied to" brigade.

[elias49]

121. This^^ Finally.. nt

[pecwae]

166. The same

and my grandchild is now waiting for him. She's so excited! I nor my daughter would trade this time for anything. There's going to be enough reality to have to deal with later. She's getting to enjoy her childhood first.

I believed, my children believed, none of us worse for it. My niece discouraged the belief in her children; Jesus was the reason for the season, period. They still got presents, but they were from family members. Took the mystical edge from it.

[Kalidurga]

29. No

it's really not a neccesary thing for kids to believe in Santa. I told my children the history of that bishop guy when they were little and that story evolved into the Santa Clause story we know now and some kids believe it. I told them not to tell other kids Santa wasn't real though, it's not up to me or them to decide what myths people are into.

[MADem]

30. "I don't know, what do you think? And why did you ask?"

Let them make the conclusion on their own. They'll let you know when they want to stop believing (even if they don't, in their heart, believe anymore).

I am not a fan of stomping on a kid's beliefs. I don't even think stomping on an adult's beliefs, so long as they don't inform public policy in a didactic way, is a nice thing to do.

[edhopper]

32. Is the quote in your title

a question for me?

[MADem]

35. No, the quote in my title is how I would respond to a child asking the "Is Santa real?" question. nt

[edhopper]

37. Got it

[fishwax]

129. yeah, that's my general take too

Letting/helping them figure it out on their own seems the natural approach, to me.

[MADem]

135. A lot of times they already know, they just hang on to the fiction because it's more ... fun.

I'm an old fart, but I don't like these world-weary six year olds selling real estate on their smart phones, or little girls dressed like cocktail waitresses in crop tops, makeup and high heels dancing around like they work hard for the money. It just offends me. I had a happy (if rather mobile and international) childhood, and I think every kid deserves one of those. They should run, jump, PLAY--not worry about being "cool" and having "cool things" and imitating adults. If their culture includes Santa, they should enjoy Santa. If their culture includes Amu Nowruz, they should enjoy him, too--there's no reason to push kids into these hard, mature, reality-based stances too soon. It isolates them from their peers and makes them feel separate from the group. I think they will one day resent parents who are too hardass and practical, too, and who put too much heavy stuff on them when they're too young to deal with it.

There's so much pressure to turn little kids into these edgy, wiseacre ... CONSUMERS of what is pretty much shit...shit clothes, shit plastic crap, shit, shit, shit! I can't bear it. That's why I give money...I can't participate in the shit-buying, I give them money and make 'em do it themselves!

[world wide wally]

36. I don't think that giving a young child something magical to believe in is such a bad thing.

As we go through life, we constantly look for new heroes who are going make things okay (ie...Barack Obama). And if there are none on the horizon, we dig up one from the past and ascribe legend to them... (Ie... Ronald Reagan, JFK)
Santa Claus is just a good one for small kids.

[951-Riverside]

38. No, I don't think children should be lied to

I don't care if its for Jesus, Mohammed, Budda or Corporate Jesus (Santa), lying to kids about fictional characters is wrong and it instills distrust in their minds.

[Shivering Jemmy]

107. Children are the absolute best people to lie to.

[Drunken Irishman]

115. You've never, ever lied to your child ... ever?

I find that hard to believe. Parents tell white lies all the time, even if they're not bad lies.

[sendero]

39. Somewhere around age 10..

... or so. No reason for a 5 year old to not believe in Santa.

[branford]

40. Hold on . . . Santa isn't real ???

[cwydro]

49. He is too!

Just saw him at the mall😉

[merrily]

52. LOL. You got my vote for thread winner.

[ocd liberal]

41. I loved believing in Santa as a kid!

I was not crazy about the idea that a strange man was going to come into our house during the night, gifts or not. Just leave them on the porch! I figured he wasn't real, and as I approached 10 & 11 years old, my mother would write my gift tags as not only being from Santa, but also Mrs. Claus, The Elves, Rudolph, etc. Since the tags were always written in my mother's handwriting, I slowly realized that she was Santa, Grandmas were Santa, Dads are Santa, friends can be Santa.

Of course when my kids came along, I was never going to deprive them of the magic of Santa and the gradual awareness that kids naturally gain as the years go by. I knew my son had figured it out when he snuck up next to me at Target and secretly showed me a toy for his sister and said, "You should put this in Claire's stocking." That was a beautiful moment with him; knowing that he understood what parents do to put magic into their kids' lives.

My daughter is 10 now and she has conceded that she knows elves aren't real. It's like watching a balloon lose air over time.

[Coventina]

42. Lying to children is wrong. Lying to anyone is wrong.

Even if you dress it up in a jolly red suit.

I'm glad I never believed in Santa. I came from extreme poverty and I would have assumed that Santa hated me, because I never got all the shiny toys that other children got.

[merrily]

56. I'm sorry.

We were close to that, though both my parents worked and my dad worked every hour of overtime he could ever get, even when he was past retirement age and suffering from as yet undiagnosed cancer.

However, as kids, we did get some things from aunts and uncles who had never married and had no children of their own. Bless them, they got so much joy from playing Santa to their little nieces and nephews. Even when under five, I knew on some level that we had very little, so getting things from Santa convinced me beyond all reasonable doubt that Santa was indeed real. And I still believe that today.

[raccoon]

113. Thanks for posting. Very good point. nt

[Orsino]

43. As real as any other fairy tale.

It makes a great bedtime story, but parents conspiring to lie to the kids has a touch of creepiness about it.

I'd prefer that children be engaged actively in learning to be Santa, than in placating invisible deities.

[Lars39]

44. And then there's the Elf on the Shelf craze...

Got a SIL pushing that crap on her 12 yo.

[merrily]

45. For me, the real question is, should I tell my husband there is a Santa Claus?

My husband and I had two very different views on this.

When I found out who "my" Santa was, I had mixed feelings, especially because Santa had actually handed me some presents every year in my home on Christmas Eve. (My unmarried Uncle--whose name was Nick-- and his two unmarried sisters had taken turns dressing up in a Santa costume --and full face mask---every year, and silently playing Santa.

And, supposedly for the gratification of us kids, Santa silently bopped an adult with a gavel every now and then. I never caught on that Santa hit only the adults was scared every second of being declared naughty, the cue for Santa to wield the gavel.

So, for me, Santa was magical and very eagerly awaited every year, but pretty scary too! (I gladly visited the Santas in stores, but only the Santa who came to my home was "the real Santa."

When Santa stopped coming to my home because my uncle knew that I had stopped believing, I was very sad. But, also, I do have a huge thing about not lying to kids.

When my husband found out that Santa was really the old folks at home, he felt as though adults had been having a joke at his expense, that he'd been made a fool of. He did not want us to do that to our son.

My son was born in mid-September, so it was only as the third Christmas of his life approached that he could carry on any kind of conversation. At that point, it became clear that it was not really up to my husband! Members of our family and strangers everywhere would ask my son what Santa was bringing him. And, at first, I would try to explain to them, with my excited son in my arms or holding my hand, that my husband did not want to go that route.

Was I to try to explain to a toddler who had just turned two that that everyone he knew and loved and a hundred strangers and all his TV programs were all telling him the exact same lie and no Santa was bringing him diddly, so he should just stop getting excited about that?

Or was I just going to go along with the tide (as I really wanted to do all along) and have to break that to my husband, who felt so strongly about not fooling his son?

[raccoon]

114. I felt exactly the way your husband did. nt

[merrily]

137. I'm so sorry. Did you get over it? My husband still wasn't over it when our son was born.

[raccoon]

148. I guess not. I decided a long time ago I'd never tell my kids there was a Santa.

But the only kids I've had are four-footed. Guess I could tell them about
Santa Claws (ouch!).


Happy holidays to you and your family!

[merrily]

151. LOL! Good one. Thank you and the same to you.

I hope 2015 brings you many good things.

[Ykcutnek]

47. Yes. It's harmless.

While such elaborate ruses may technically be deception, most psychologists believe that lying to the kids about Santa Claus is harmless, and may even have benefits.

For instance, Santa can serve as an example of selflessness and create family traditions, said Jared Durtschi, a professor of marriage and family therapy at Kansas State University.

"If it's about giving and love and service, I think it's a healthy, wonderful thing that can help them for the rest of their life," Durtschi said.

http://www.livescience.com/25594-santa-belief-psychology.html

[Salviati]

83. To paraphrase Terry Pratchett

Humans need fantasy to be human, to be the place where the falling angel meets the rising ape. We need the Hogfather (i.e. Santa) as practice, you have to start learning to believe the little lies, so that you can believe the big ones, like Justice, Mercy, Duty, that sort of thing.

[Hekate]

142. WELL SAID, YOUNG HUMAN, YOUVE BEEN PAYING ATTENTION. HO. HO. HO.

That passage you quoted from The Hogfather always brings me to tears. It's very true.

Happy Hogswatchnight, Salviati.

[surrealAmerican]

51. If you lie to your children, you should be aware ...

... that you are setting an example for them to lie to you. If you want your relationship to be based on honesty, you should be honest.

[Nye Bevan]

88. How about telling Grandma that the meal she made is delicious?

When it isn't? I remember understanding the difference between harmless lies and harmful lies at a young age.

[surrealAmerican]

179. That really depends more on the sort of relationship the child has ...

... with the grandmother.

If the parents are the primary caretakers, the relationship between them is the one we're talking about, and that is where you need to be deciding if lies to each other are acceptable.

[yeoman6987]

53. Let then be kids. Around 11 they tend to find out

I was the oldest and my parents told me that if I didn't believe anymore...no gifts. This was to ensure I protected the secret from the younger kids. It was a great method and works in a lot of families.

[Skidmore]

54. Could it be that we should acknowledge the roots of the tale?

https://www.facebook.com/ancientoriginsweb?fref=photo

ON THIS DAY IN HISTORY – On 6th December, 343 – Saint Nicholas, Greek bishop and saint, died in Myra, Lycia. The real story of Santa Claus begins with Saint Nicholas, who was born in the village of Patara, an area which was once Greek but is now part of Turkey. He was born to wealthy parents, who died in an epidemic while Nicholas was still young. Nicholas used his entire inheritance to assist the needy, the sick, and the suffering. One account of Nicholas tells that he presented three impoverished daughters with dowries so that they would not have to become prostitutes. On three different occasions, the bags of gold providing the dowries had appeared in their home. They had been tossed through an open window and are said to have landed in stockings or shoes left before the fire to dry. This led to the custom of children hanging stockings or putting out shoes, eagerly awaiting gifts from Saint Nicholas. Nicholas was made Bishop of Myra while still a young man and became known throughout the land for his generosity to those in need and his love for children. Thus began the tradition of gift-giving in honour of Saint Nicholas, whose modern name Santa Claus, comes from the Dutch ‘Sinterklaas’. Saint Nicholas died on 6th December, 343 AD and so on the eve of his death, children were bestowed gifts in his honour. December 6th is still the main day for gift giving in many countries in Europe, known as Saint Nicholas’ Day. In other countries, the day of gifts was moved in the course of the Reformation and its opposition to the veneration of saints to the 24th and 25th December.

[merrily]

58. I don't know that the roots of the tale were all that accurate, either.

[newfie11]

55. It's up to the parents

Why not let them live a magical time. They will learn the real world soon enough.

[Iggo]

60. If and when they ask, I tell them the truth.

Trust is important.

[librechik]

61. I always waited for my kids to ask. When they asked, I told them the truth.

Can't say any of them was surprised when they found out!

[helpmetohelpyou]

62. yes

[edhopper]

64. yes what?

[helpmetohelpyou]

65. I would tell a small child santa is real if they asked

[edhopper]

67. is there an age

when you would tell them the truth?

[logosoco]

63. The best answer to that (and many other questions!) is "What do you think?"

If they ask, they have probably already figured it out.
That's about how it went with my kids. Then I would tell them not to tell other kids, to let them figure it out. But, that didn't even last a day, my youngest daughter barely remembers believing because my oldest daughter told her!

I did the same thing with god/ Jesus.

My mom was teaching me "the Catholic way" around the same time as Santa. She didn't realize I was also using my new found knowledge/logic/reasoning to that story as well.

[Inkfreak]

69. I'm having my first kid in July, so this is a great question.

Honestly, I'm not inclined to tell him there's a Santa. I don't even have any memories of believing in him, myself. Shit, we lived in a rundown trailer when I was 4ish and I remember thinking "what chimney?" My Mom would label stuff from Santa but I knda knew..

She busted her butt as s single mom to make sure we had a Christmas. I'd have rather acknowledged that, I think. But...even if I don't encourage this, it be all over the place from friends and family. If I tell my child there's no Santa he's prolly gonna repeat that to anyone if/when the subject comes up. Then it'll lead to awkwardness. Like what if he's telling everyone in class they're crazy for believing, lol. I suppose I'll just go along to get along.








Notice I said he?

[Nye Bevan]

87. Congratulations and enjoy the magical time of your child believing in Santa!

This time will pass too quickly.

[Inkfreak]

162. Thanks! And you're right! It's about the kid being happy! (nt)

[ScreamingMeemie]

101. I think you DID just acknowledge that...

congrats on your new little one.

[Inkfreak]

163. True! And thank you, I'm pretty stoked! (nt)

[Renew Deal]

155. Congrats Inkfreak!

[Inkfreak]

164. Thanks! It's crazy exciting, lol. (nt)

[Frustratedlady]

71. Answer honestly, but lovingly when they ask.

As a great-grandmother, I have gone through many "awakenings" over the past 50 years. It has been fun and quite an experience to watch the children go from anticipation to awareness in too few years.

Each Christmas Eve, the children have waited for Santa's stomping and "Ho, Ho, Ho'g" as he dropped his bag of toys on our deck. To see their eyes widen, watch them cling to each other in excitement (and, probably a touch of group-induced fear) has been an experience for not only the little ones, but their parents and grandparents.

Last year was the end of that tradition, but although I had announced I would no longer be able to have Christmas Eve since the family had grown in leaps and bounds, some of my grandchildren came forth and asked if I'd make an exception for them since Christmas Eve at Grandma's was the only one they'd ever known. Of course, all are welcome if that's the reason.

This year, at least two of my great-grandchildren are at the threshold, but clinging to the belief there is a Santa. I made the "mistake" of telling them a few years back when they stopped in for a visit that they had just missed Santa...he'd stopped by for breakfast and a report on how my great-grandchildren were doing this year. The eldest, a girl, was quiet about that bit of information, but her brother's eyes grew huge and I could tell he must have just gotten in trouble about something...nothing new with him as he was a Tom Sawyer and proud of it. From then on, he'd send his sister in my back door to check to see if Santa was here before he'd enter.

Last summer, his family was heading down the highway when he saw a vanity license plate with "Santa" on the car ahead. He went ballistic and urged his mother to pass the car so he could see what Santa looked like. She finally did so and there was an elderly man with a full white beard chugging along the highway. He's now 10 and you couldn't convince him there is no Santa if you tried. His sister is now 12 and she privately believes in Santa and doesn't get involved in conversations about Santa with her peers. She just believes and thinks believing is beautiful...not to mention that you get more gifts as long as you believe.

So, we let the kids believe as long as they want. If they ask, we say that we believe since he's such a jolly old soul and fun to believe in, but it's also OK if you don't believe. Just not as much fun. They gradually go from pressing their noses to the window to see Rudolph's red nose in the sky (planes) to encouraging the younger ones to do the same. It has become a natural transition from childhood to teenage and every darned one of the kids have turned out to be sensitive, loving and generous in helping others.

Santa and I are awfully proud of each and every child...young or grown.

[William769]

72. But Santa is real.

Or at least thee meaning behind him. I knew at a very young age that Santa was my parents. The meaning of Santa lives on in all of us.

[ancianita]

73. Shifting from belief in a literal Santa to a belief in the spirit of Santa isn't hard for kids.

School kids bring the bad news, and then parents explain the spirit of giving that Santa represents. Kids still like to believe even when they know the literal isn't true. That's been my experience and my kids'.

[MineralMan]

74. Santa is as real as all other mythological entities.

I could ask the same question about any deity you'd care to mention.

[niyad]

75. "yes, virginia, there IS a santa claus"

Yes, Virginia ...

Editorial of The New York Sun | December 21, 2012


We take pleasure in answering thus prominently the communication below, expressing at the same time our great gratification that its faithful author is numbered among the friends of The Sun:

Dear Editor—

I am 8 years old. Some of my little friends say there is no Santa Claus. Papa says, "If you see it in The Sun, it's so." Please tell me the truth, is there a Santa Claus?

Virginia O'Hanlon
115 West Ninety Fifth Street

Virginia, your little friends are wrong. They have been affected by the skepticism of a skeptical age. They do not believe except they see. They think that nothing can be which is not comprehensible by their little minds. All minds, Virginia, whether they be men's or children's, are little. In this great universe of ours, man is a mere insect, an ant, in his intellect as compared with the boundless world about him, as measured by the intelligence capable of grasping the whole of truth and knowledge.

Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus. He exists as certainly as love and generosity and devotion exist, and you know that they abound and give to your life its highest beauty and joy. Alas! how dreary would be the world if there were no Santa Claus! It would be as dreary as if there were no Virginias. There would be no childlike faith then, no poetry, no romance to make tolerable this existence.

We should have no enjoyment, except in sense and sight. The external light with which childhood fills the world would be extinguished.

Not believe in Santa Claus! You might as well not believe in fairies. You might get your papa to hire men to watch in all the chimneys on Christmas Eve to catch Santa Claus, but even if you did not see Santa Claus coming down, what would that prove? Nobody sees Santa Claus, but that is no sign that there is no Santa Claus. The most real things in the world are those that neither children nor men can see. Did you ever see fairies dancing on the lawn? Of course not, but that's no proof that they are not there. Nobody can conceive or imagine all the wonders there are unseen and unseeable in the world.

You tear apart the baby's rattle and see what makes the noise inside, but there is a veil covering the unseen world which not the strongest man, nor even the united strength of all the strongest men that ever lived could tear apart. Only faith, poetry, love, romance, can push aside that curtain and view and picture the supernal beauty and glory beyond. Is it all real? Ah, Virginia, in all this world there is nothing else real and abiding.

No Santa Claus! Thank God! He lives and lives forever. A thousand years from now, Virginia, nay 10 times 10,000 years from now, he will continue to make glad the heart of childhood.

-----------------

"Is There a Santa Claus?" reprinted from the September 21, 1897, number of The New York Sun.

[gopiscrap]

76. No you should never start the myth of Santa

he is a commercialized version of St. Nicholas to fleece you of your money as you buy cheap crap from China. Christmas has turned into a materialistic frenzy and Santa is just one way the stores get you to buy their over priced shit. Christmas has turned into a worthless holiday, Jesus wasn't even born in December!

[Nye Bevan]

86. Every Who down in Whoville, the tall and the small, was singing, without *any* presents at all!

Every Who down in Who-ville, the tall and the small,
Was singing! Without any presents at all!
He HADN'T stopped Christmas from coming! IT CAME!
Somehow or other, it came just the same!

And the Grinch, with his Grinch-feet ice-cold in the snow, stood puzzling and puzzling:
How could it be so?
It came without ribbons! It came without tags!
It came without packages, boxes, or bags!
And he puzzled and puzzed, till his puzzler was sore.
Then the Grinch thought of something he hadn't before!
"Maybe Christmas," he thought, "doesn't come from a store.
Maybe Christmas… perhaps… means a little bit more."

[niyad]

77. santa is a woman

Santa is a Woman?
Author Unknown

I think Santa Claus is a woman ... I hate to be the one to defy sacred myth, but I believe he's a she.

Think about it. Christmas is a big, organized, warm, fuzzy, nurturing social deal, and I have a tough time believing a guy could possibly pull it all off!

For starters, the vast majority of men don't even think about selecting gifts until Christmas Eve. It's as if they are all frozen in some kind of Ebenezerian Time Warp until 3 p.m. on Dec. 24th, when they - with amazing calm - call other errant men and plan for a last-minute shopping spree.

Once at the mall, they always seem surprised to find only Ronco products, socket wrench sets, and mood rings left on the shelves. (You might think this would send them into a fit of panic and guilt, but my husband tells me it's an enormous relief because it lessens the 11th hour decision-making burden.) On this count alone, I'm convinced Santa is a woman. Surely, if he were a man, everyone in the universe would wake up Christmas morning to find a rotating musical Chia Pet under the tree, still in the bag.

Another problem for a he-Santa would be getting there. First of all, there would be no reindeer because they would all be dead, gutted and strapped on to the rear bumper of the sleigh amid wide-eyed, desperate claims that buck season had been extended. Blitzen's rack would already be on the way to the taxidermist.

Even if the male Santa DID have reindeer, he'd still have transportation problems because he would inevitably get lost up there in the snow and clouds and then refuse to stop and ask for directions.

Add to this the fact that there would be unavoidable delays in the chimney, where the Bob Vila-like Santa would stop to inspect and repoint bricks in the flue. He would also need to check for carbon monoxide fumes in every gas fireplace, and get under every Christmas tree that is crooked to straighten it to a perfectly upright 90-degree angle.

Other reasons why Santa can't possibly be a man:

Men can't pack a bag.
Men would rather be dead than caught wearing red velvet.
Men would feel their masculinity is threatened ... having to be seen with all those elves.
Men don't answer their mail.
Men would refuse to allow their physique to be described even in jest as anything remotely resembling a "bowlful of jelly."
Men aren't interested in stockings unless somebody's wearing them.
Having to do the "Ho Ho Ho" thing would seriously inhibit their ability to pick up women.
Finally, being responsible for Christmas would require a commitment.

I can buy the fact that other mythical characters are men ...

Father Time shows up once a year unshaven and looking ominous.
Definite guy.

Cupid flies around carrying weapons.
Guy

Uncle Sam is a politician who likes to point fingers.
Ditto

Any one of these individuals could pass the testosterone screening test. But not St. Nick. Not a chance. As long as we have each other, good will, peace on earth, faith and Nat King Cole's version of "The Christmas Song," it probably makes little difference what gender Santa is.

I just wish she'd quit dressing like a guy!!!

http://www.kraftmstr.com/christmas/humor/womansanta.html

[AndreaCG]

105. Never saw that before. Thanks for sharing.

[niyad]

184. you are welcome. I got a card like that many years ago, always loved it.

[uppityperson]

80. for mine Santa was the spirit of Xmas, and we became Santa helpers at an early age, giving

Things to others without putting our names on them. Rather than "to you, from me", it was " to you".

The store santas are also santa helpers, with Santa being the larger spirit whithin us all.

I found out when I was about 5-6, my mom said I could chose to participate and enjoy, or opt out. As a parent, I decided to go the Santa helper route and it went over well. Rather than stuff appearing, we all got to find little stuff for each other to enjoy with no thanks back.

[elleng]

81. I couldn't lie to my daughter.

My husband was furious with me.

I absolutely agree: Old enough to ask> NO LIES. Sorry I don't recall my words, in response to her question. After all, she's almost 30 now!

[Bad Thoughts]

89. I told Justice is real

I don't do anything to feed into the perception of the reality of Santa Claus. I don't tell to be good, or else Santa will see. I don't tell him that Santa brings gifts or lives in the North Pole. I just let him have fun.

[elleng]

91. Christmas gifts were a HUGE deal, for my husband.

We had a huge tree, and a huge number of gifts. Husband probably signed some of the gifts from Santa. I didn't. They had LOTS of fun.

[JCMach1]

82. Make believe is fun... When the film Ice Age was popular, I created Scrat Day for them

they asked Scrat for presents AND he delivered...

They basically knew it was play, but they played it to the hilt... writing letters to Scrat, drawing pictures of what they wanted Scrat to bring.

[OregonBlue]

90. I always asked "what do you think and why". Until my son was 9 he always said he believed he was and

had good reasons. At 9 he found out from friends that Santa probably was not real and told me why. I then explained that Santa was an idea of what Christmas means. Every child matters and everyone should share. It made sense to him and he didn't feel he had been lied to.

[LittleBlue]

92. Santa isn't real?

Lies!

[840high]

136. lol -

[TheKentuckian]

93. If a friend at school doesn't get anything or not much of anything do you tell the child the friend

was bad this year to maintain the lie?

It seems to reinforce the "poverty is a punishment for sin" mentality to me, I'm glad I wasn't told this lie.

My mother proactively told me about St. Nicholas, that he was long dead, and that the presents came from her and my grandparents.

Guess what? Didn't take away the magical feelings on Christmas morning or the love of Christmas stories. In fact, I loves me some Christmas!

[gollygee]

94. I shameless lie to my kids about this

I very fondly remember the lie, and I keep it going until it seems silly with my kids. I do obviously tell the truth at some point, but they love it. The youngest still believes. When the older figured it out, I said that it's a fun game people like to play along with. She actually figured out the Easter Bunny first, and then generalized that all of those myths must not be true. But she still loves the myth.

My parents kept pretending they thought it was true until we were adults. It was fun.

[Nye Bevan]

118. It's so cute when the older kids are in on the secret

and conspire with the adults to make it fun for the kids who still believe.

In these troubled times it's nice that some things are just pure innocent fun.

[Major Hogwash]

123. It was hard for me to keep the truth from my little brother.

The year that I was told the truth by my grandmother.
I was devastated by that revelation.
Because I still believed.

So, then on Christmas morning, a few months later that same year, when my father used snow flocking that was used for Christmas trees to form several footprints going from the fireplace's tile setting in front of the fireplace to the tree and back, I was totally aghast that my father expected me to join in with the huge lie in order to fool my little brother.
Those footprints hadn't been there the night before, so I knew that someone had put them there!

Then I realized that my father didn't know that my grandmother had let the cat out of the bag earlier that year, and he was not only lying to my little brother, he was lying to me!
So, I gave him the F. Lee Bailey treatment, and I asked him about 100 questions about Santa.
I spent at least the next 10 minutes cross-examining him for his concocted, phony version of Santa and the whole North Pole mystery story.
When suddenly, my grandfather interrupted my interrogation to join forces with my father to corroborate my father's story by asking me if I hadn't heard the footsteps of the reindeer on the roof late at night on the previous night!

Well, I hadn't.
And so, how was I supposed to call my grandfather a liar for saying they woke him up!?
Instead, I smiled, smirked actually, just like the all-knowing Barney Fife, realizing that he also didn't know that grandmother had confided in me earlier that year.

My mind was racing 1000 miles an hour knowing that I had just stumbled on to the biggest lying cabal in family history!
I was stunned, I was scared, I was mortified, all at the same time.
So, I turned to the one person in the world who I knew I could trust, the one person that had never lied to me in my entire life, my mother, and I asked her.
And she said, "Of course there is a Santa, everyone knows that . . you've even met him several times!!"

Well, that confused the hell out of me for yet another year.
So, I stopped the inquisition to start opening my presents.

But by the next Christmas, it no longer mattered, because by then I had accidently walked in on my aunt when she was dressing, while her and my uncle were both visiting us at Christmas.
And I saw my aunt in mid-dress, putting on some of the lacy stuff while still half-naked, standing in front of a full-length mirror, so I got to see both sides of the wonderfulness of women all at once.
Another mystery solved!
I knew back then, even though I was quite young when that happened, that I was very lucky to be a member of my family.
For I was allowed to live after walking in on her like that.

So, any doubt or questions I had about Santa no longer seemed relevant by that age.
Because when my aunt said there was a Santa Claus, there was a frickin' Santa Claus!!

Who was I to question the wisdom of the adults in my family?
After all, I had just gotten the best Christmas present I would get that year, so I wasn't going to ruin it by pissing her off!

[snappyturtle]

157. This brought me a big chuckle....thank you. nt

[malokvale77]

95. If they are mindful enough to ask the question...

they are owed the truth.

[Marrah_G]

96. I think at a certain point children naturally come to realize Santa is mom and dad.

Before that, I think imagination and a sense of wonder is a good thing. There is enough time in ones life to experience harsh realities.

[FSogol]

99. +1. It would be a cruel world if we didn't allow kids to believe in magic and fun

for a few short years.

[FourScore]

139. When I asked my mother if Santa was real, she just smiled joyously and said,

"Santa is real, if you believe he is real."

When I asked if she was Santa, she just laughed, and said, "Do I look like Santa?" I knew she was.

Still, I love that she let me hold on to the fantasy a little longer. I came from a big family, and we didn't have a lot of money growing up. But Christmas morning was always magic. I never felt betrayed. Or lied to. I felt loved. Santa came every year until the last child was gone. Then, he started coming for the next generation of children.

To the author of the OP, my advice would be this: Don't spoil the fun. Not for you and not for your child. They'll figure it out on their own. And being Santa really is magical.

[FSogol]

160. Well said. n/t

[LawDeeDah]

97. Probably not. I would do it different if I could do that over again with the kid.

There is a way to make Santa magical and just as fun without the Big Lie.

I don't think there was any trauma when the kid realized, but most likely a bit of wtf (not in those words, of course). In my childhood I grew into the idea slowly, nobody just out and out said I was being lied to.

[Rosa Luxemburg]

100. depends what real means

he is magical!

[upaloopa]

103. Should a child be told god is real ?

Seems like a similar issue. We say no Santa but believe in baby Jesus who is really a god.

[Nye Bevan]

126. Virtually all historians believe that there really was a Jesus Christ.

Virtually all scholars who write on the subject accept that Jesus existed,[7][8][9][10] although scholars differ about the beliefs and teachings of Jesus as well as the accuracy of the accounts of his life, and the only two events subject to "almost universal assent" are that Jesus was baptized by John the Baptist and was crucified by the order of the Roman Prefect Pontius Pilate.[11][12][13][14]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Historical_Jesus

So if anything, it would be lying to tell your kids that Jesus did not exist. Of course, whether he was actually the son of God is more of a thorny issue (no pun intended). But whether or not he was, most of his advice was pretty sound.

[Iggo]

161. Virtually All Biblical Scholars =/= Virtually All Historians.

[Nye Bevan]

165. So... historians of that time period (nt)

[Iggo]

167. No...biblical scholars.

The bible is not a historical time period. It's a book.

[Capt. Obvious]

176. Checkmate Atheists

[Politicalboi]

104. Just because they ask

Doesn't mean they "know". They may have gotten into an argument with another child who is older that told them he wasn't real. I figured it out by the time I was 9. A little let down, but livable. It's just the norm for most. I don't think it hurts anyone to go along for as long as the kid is 8 or under.

[Shivering Jemmy]

106. You should wait until they are older

And then tell them Santa is real.

Young kids cannot handle the fact of his existence.

[LeftInTX]

108. When I told my son: Our Santa is kinda poor

He figured it out immediately

All we could afford was stocking stuffers.
No big deal.

[JI7]

109. in most cases isn't it just something kids figure out on their own as they get older

they become more mature and are able to see the world in more complicated ways and realize for themselves without any shock what is real or make believe.

[raccoon]

110. NO NO NO. I felt betrayed and lied to when I found out Santa was a lie.

In families where TRUST IS ALREADY AN ISSUE, which it was in my alcoholic family,
it was just one more lie.

[3catwoman3]

112. When our sons were little, I was very...

Last edited Sun Dec 7, 2014, 10:14 AM - Edit history (1)

...careful to always say, "the spirit of Santa Claus", so they wouldn't be able to accuse me of being untruthful once the cat was out of Santa's bag. I remember feeling quite disillusioned when I found out Santa wasn't real, and being pretty upset at my parents for lying to me.

I established a family ritual of hanging a tree ornament on their doorknobs after they had fallen asleep. That was the signal that that the spirit of Santa Claus had stopped by. They are 24 and 22 now, and it is a tradition we continue. Before too long, they probably won't be coming home for Christmas anymore. At that time, I will give each of them the ornaments that have accumulated over the years to kickstart their own collections.

[MerryBlooms]

117. I think your tradition is absolutely beautiful. All the magic and love, and a

clear conscience.
Well done.

[sakabatou]

116. No.

[rug]

119. Right after they learn about Thanksgiving.

[Codeine]

120. We haven't bothered with Santa or the Tooth Fairy.

And we're also raising a pair of little atheists. Not a big fan of fairy tales.

[RedCappedBandit]

124. Probably not a big deal.

Once I realized santa wasn't real I realized the whole religion thing was nothing more than a story. Ironic I guess.

[Orrex]

125. Instead of that lie, we told our children that the Middle Class is real.

We're cruel parents, I know.

[d_b]

127. mom told me

santa stops bringing presents when you stop believing in him

[DinahMoeHum]

128. Methinks they should learn about the original "Santa". . .

. . .St. Nicholas of Myra.

http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/home/

http://www.stnicholascenter.org/pages/who-is-st-nicholas/

[Initech]

130. If Santa isn't real, the Grinch definitely is.

And the Grinch would be the Walton Family and the Koch Brothers.

[diabeticman]

131. My wife would tell you Santa is real. She still believes. She believes santa is the spirit of

giving and the hope of humanity. (though this year and everything going on she is finding it very hard this year to enjoy that spirit and embrace the joy). So what if the men in the red suits are the personification of that idea as long as a gift is given in selfless joy Santa lives.

The Sun said santa was real in 1896.

[abelenkpe]

132. Not cool to lie to kids nt

[Recursion]

133. My dad has a full beard and usually plays Santa around the holidays

He's 66 and he'll tell you completely seriously Santa is real.

[FourScore]

140. To this day, when I see Santa

I get so nervous and excited. You would think I didn't know better. I remember telling one Santa once, "I still have my Dancerina doll!" To which he responded, "I'm so glad to hear that! I remember giving it to you!"

Santa is magic.

I would love your Dad.

[Renew Deal]

154. He is Santa so he knows first hand that he's real

At least in your family.

[Hekate]

141. Why not have a little magic in a child's life for awhile? They outgrow it soon enough...

I loved my mother, but she was rather rigidly rational. The best she could find to say about Santa Claus was that "Santa is the spirit of Christmas, and we are Santa's helpers." That's fine as far as it goes, but the rest of the lesson was imparted in stories of children she knew when she was a kid who still believed in Santa when they started school (or in one case a girl who was 12) and came in for a nasty shock when other kids revealed the awful truth. Well, we were not going to be allowed any chance of that!

In her mind Santa got rolled into all unfulfilled fantasy expectations along with Cinderella, the Handsome Prince, and a girl's perfect wedding happening IRL -- and she just was not having any of that foolishness.

With my own two I chose a different tack, and we got to believe in Santa for their early years. Make-believe isn't lying, as long as you give it up at the appropriate time, and in their case they got the picture gradually. And Santa became the Spirit of Christmas indeed.

[bigwillq]

143. They should not be lied to if they ask if Santa is real.

If a child asks, a parent should tell them the truth.
But I have no issue with the concept of Santa. I thought it was cool when I was a young child, and I didn't feel betrayed when I found out Santa was not real. I still got presents, and that's all I cared about. LOL

[oberliner]

149. It's fun to pretend

It's nice to be able to believe in magic while you can.

[ileus]

150. I've been waiting for this thread, and all the "I was scared for life" replies.

My kids are now 10&12 and both know the red suit guy is a fake, but we still have fun toying with them over it.


Does it cause trust issues? No
Does it cause them to believe in Jesus? No
Does it undermine our parenting authority? No
Will it make them easy prey to fall for BS from others? No

[Renew Deal]

153. If the kid asks, they should be told the truth

It doesn't matter if it's Santa, the Easter Bunny, wrestling, mermaids, etc. Once they really figure it out it's over. I don't know how people handle wrestling these days since they admitted being fake many years ago. But I remember that being a controversy when it happened.

[Peacetrain]

156. I remember when I was 6 and figured out there was no Santa Claus

I still held on to the fantasy for another year.. because I enjoyed it.. It was fun, and is still fun almost 60 years later.. that fantasy led to writing and teaching.. it is up to the parent who knows their child better than anyone else..

[JoePhilly]

158. My wife and youngest daughter pretended ...

... my wife pretended not to know that my youngest daughter knew, that Santa was not real.

... and my youngest daughter pretended to still believe, even though she knew Santa was not real, and she knew that her mom knew she knew.

Me and our other two older kid thought it was hilarious. My wife and youngest daughter both pretending Santa was real.

I think it went on for 3 years in a row. To this day, I don't think either of them has acknowledged that Santa is not real. My daughter is 13.

Oh ... the correct response to the question "Is Santa real" , is "Why, what did you hear?"

Its like when a kid asks, "Where do babies come from?" ... You don't just jump to "Well, a man puts his penis in a woman's vagina ... and then ... "

You start by asking them questions to get a sense of what they've heard, and what they already know.

That way, you can determine at what level of detail and specificity you should use when you respond.

[msanthrope]

159. My atheist daughter didn't believe in Jesus, but she believed in Santa. Heck....

she even got Santa to make her a fairy house based on blueprints drawn up by Tinkerbell. It had her name on it, in fairy dust.

Yeah....Mommy sweated blood making that wish come true......

[metalbot]

168. I'm a little bit amused...

...by the responses that say "I would never lie to my child, but I would teach them to lie to other children who do believe in Santa".

[Capt. Obvious]

172. Let them have fun in make believe while they can

Eventually they'll figure out that Santa, the Easter bunny, the tooth fairy, and god are fake.

[Nye Bevan]

174. Well.... about 2% of Americans are atheists

http://religions.pewforum.org/reports

so I wouldn't hold my breath on that last one.

[Capt. Obvious]

175. Santa bless you

[mmonk]

173. That doesn't bother me. What bothers me is adults

that don't believe science can be real but Noah's Ark is.

[The2ndWheel]

177. I would agree that there just comes a point where they probably figure it out themselves

if they're asking about it. That realization is hardly traumatizing. We're talking about presents. I can't believe my parents lied to me and gave me stuff I wanted! They're horrible.

If anything, the kid will grow up and then appreciate what their parents had to do to give them something special, whatever that may be, on Christmas.

[d_r]

178. depends on if child it circumsised or not

[Vattel]

180. good point

[dilby]

183. Should children be taught Parables or fables?

Or should a parent start every story they tell their child with, "This is a work of Fiction, it's not real, don't believe it". There is some power in parables and fables and I think it's fine that you don't tell your child it's not real, they will learn soon enough but they will come to understand the positive message before they learn it's fiction.

[LeftinOH]

185. I believed in Santa as a kid; Christmas was a thrilling time of year

for me and my siblings. Eventually we figured it out -and came to understand the 'spirit' of Santa. We have no lasting scars because of it. I always felt kind of sorry for those kids who never had the luxury of parents who were willing to get involved in the joy of Christmas on a child's level.

[RobinA]

187. We Had Great Christmases

at my house growing up and Santa was a part of it I could have done without. I can't remember ever beliving in Santa, although I probably did when I was pre-memory 1-3 years. After that...give me a break: flying reindeer, hitting all kid's houses in one night, a bag of toys big enough for all kids? This born skeptic was not buying that load of bull. And at our house he decorated the tree, which he supposedly did at all houses unless they put their trees up early like my friend's family. The time element was just never something I could never buy and pretty much puts the kaboosh on the whole story.

My parents, mother especially, seemed very invested in the Santa thing, so we played along for what seemed like forever so as not to disappoint her. I could not WAIT to get rid of Santa. I think this is partly why my sister didn't do Santa when she had kids. At least until the kids came home from nursery school WANTING Santa, having heard about him from the other kids. That lasted about two years. I don't have children, but I would not have done Santa either. Not believeing in Santa (or a deity, for that matter) left plenty of Christmas magic for this ex-little kid. Santa is, after all, simply a gift bringer. That said , I do enjoy the Santa myth for the art and stories it has spawned. Kinda like the deity.

[Lolita46]

189. No.

Doesn't exist.

[cbdo2007]

190. Sure. Why not? The idea of "Santa" is very real, whether you want to play along or not.

Just because you want to be a scrooge doesn't mean you have to ruin the magic for some kid. My parents kept giving me presents from "Santa" until I was about 18. Sure, I knew they weren't from a guy flying around the world on his sleigh and making toys at the North Pole, but it was fun.

The world is shitty enough as it is, let kids be kids and have fun before they realize how shitty it is.

[leftyladyfrommo]

191. Santa was real at our house.

My dad was really into Santa. He told us lots of stories.

I don't think it hurt us one bit. I kind of think we knew there really wasn't a Santa - even from a really early age. But it was such a fun game to play that we all just kept pretending.

Same with the Easter Bunny and the Tooth Fairy.