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Related: Editorials & Other Articles, Issue Forums, Alliance Forums, Region Forums"But we can't be friends..." "Why not?" "Because you're Chinese,.. don't like Chinese People"
This written conversation happened to me two days ago, on line, in Chat. While logging on, I received a curious message that simply read: "?".So I replied back, to this girl, "Hey there, Hi, whats up, saw your note, you have a question?"
Her: "Why did you add me back? I removed you from my friends list, why did you add me back?"
Me: "OH, idk, was there a problem? We seemed to hit it off the other day in the chat room? Whats up?"
Her: "I removed you for a reason".
Me: "Oh, I am sorry, what was your reason... I guess I didn't notice.. Did I say something wrong?"
Her: "Well, we Just can't be friends..."
Me: "Oh, I am sorry, why is that, exactly?"
Her: "Because you're Chinese, don't like Chinese people."
Me: "Well, um...first of all I am not Chinese, I am Japanese. Secondly, I guess You are right, I
would not want a Racist for a friend...Third, I guess you did the right thing, thanks for letting me know.. Saves us both a lot of time and trouble. Good Luck with that hate thing ... Hope it works out for you."
Blocked her and removed from my friends list.
Nothing like a bit of brutal honesty, yeah?
okaawhatever
(9,462 posts)BillZBubb
(10,650 posts)villager
(26,001 posts)n/t
Bigmack
(8,020 posts)... to say shit in public that they used to say quietly to their drinking buddies.
Anything goes, apparently.
villager
(26,001 posts)...and the end result of those in power imagining they can do whatever they want, to whoever they want, is not going to be pretty. At all.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)the Senate next year, it might end up being a few years of hell for everyone.
villager
(26,001 posts)Some years of hell were inevitable. Alas.
Though it's already been too many years of hell, already.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)DamnYankeeInHouston
(1,365 posts)I'm sure there are oodles.
TDale313
(7,820 posts)BlueJazz
(25,348 posts)(A nice intelligent human. )
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)His response was "Ya'll look a like to me". It was then I realized you can't really ever educate these people. To him, I will always be some one other than White... and his smug superiority just showed me, how ignorant he really was.
PasadenaTrudy
(3,998 posts)by your name that you are Japanese....duh People are ignorant...
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)This was over 20 years ago.
And I was baffled.
After talking to her I learned she had lived through some awful things before and during WWII.
But even as an older person with direct cause and experience to enforce her prejudice she actively worked against it.
When guests she identified as Japanese would come into the restaurant she would go into near panic mode in the kitchen then compose herself and introduce herself. Chat with them. Explain why her first instinct was to kick them out. But she was now welcoming them. She would discount a large part of their meal.
Therapeutic for her I suppose. Possibly most awkward restaurant experience ever for them.
But at least she knew her first instincts were wrong and she was trying to overcome it.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)My family were in Hawaii during that period..Generations of Japanese Hawaiians.
Chellee
(2,097 posts)So you're secretly Kenyan then.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Japanese. Its pearl harbor day, ya know. Its entirely my fault. :S
villager
(26,001 posts)Not sure how I'd handle it if something similar happened to me (I'm Jewish -- but with a "disguised" last name...)
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)She must have seen my profile with the photo. Whoops! Can't have this happening, click. Maybe I would not have noticed, except for her one symbol "?" message. How was I supposed to interpret that, other than she had a question? She would have been better off just blocking me in the first place.
villager
(26,001 posts)You're right -- why send you a "?" at all.
Were they saying, "but can't you tell I'm a racist creep!?"
Scootaloo
(25,699 posts)Racists are rarely quiet. They get a sick joy over throwing hteir hate in people's faces. This dumbass was another example of that.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)this kind of hatred passed down from one generation to the next, its the smart one who figures out the world is not like that.. and learns that their parents were wrong about this.
Skittles
(153,164 posts)to even being to address such a racist asshole
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)She was too ignorant to determine it from my name, I guess.
Skittles
(153,164 posts)they are not worth ANY amount of time, none at ALL! KICK HER ASS TO THE CURB!!! YOU DID RIGHT!
Jamaal510
(10,893 posts)she would be brave like that while she's safe behind a keyboard. People can get mean on chat rooms and elsewhere online.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)I have a few African American friends on line, who have changed their profile pics to using White people's photos, or using a White Avatar with no photos attached to their profile. I ask them why, and they tell me hey don't want the hassle... its sad to surrender like that, why not be who you are? Why let the Racists win? I have encouraged them to do that, but they won't, its just easier to avoid the conflict than to be proud of who you really are.
Generic Other
(28,979 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Her parents probably would have probably indoctrinated her well enough to keep her away from watching those foreign Cartoons!
JHB
(37,160 posts)Say it, but with electric shocks and big cartoony mallets for emphasis!
Very cathartic!
Generic Other
(28,979 posts)WhiteAndNerdy
(365 posts)I'm sorry that happened to you. That person is apparently not too bright. Realizing that she liked you personally should have made her question her prejudice against "Chinese people," not make her reject you.
alphafemale
(18,497 posts)Racists are not reality based.
BlindTiresias
(1,563 posts)But odds are you weren't missing much anyway.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Most of the people I hang with are fairly intelligent, don't know how she slipped into our group.
BlindTiresias
(1,563 posts)boba milk tea is amazing, I love your sig.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Taro is my favorite.
U4ikLefty
(4,012 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Vietnamese... Guess ol' Hank Hill never thought it out that far...
jberryhill
(62,444 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Thank you!
Cha
(297,275 posts)cry, yuiyoshida.
Gotta feel a little bit sorry for such empty headed vapidity.. what vacant lives guided by hate of what they don't even know.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)She never referred to me as any of that, maybe there is hope for her yet, some day.
Cha
(297,275 posts)Odin2005
(53,521 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)This stuff is passed down from generation to generation. Grand parents to parents to their kids, one day her kids, if she has some will wake up to the fact, that racial prejudice is just stupid, and should not be tolerated.
Odin2005
(53,521 posts)I grew up in rural Minnesota and the only people I have ever known to hate Asians are WW2 vets.
NBachers
(17,117 posts)How boring it would be to live in a monochrome world.
Major Hogwash
(17,656 posts)I have run in to some of the same type of people who exhibit that low level of ignorance.
And as far as I am concerned, it just isn't worth my time to educate them about how many of the really cool, really special experiences in life they are already discounting simply because it is "Chinese", or "Japanese", or whatever it happens to be.
madokie
(51,076 posts)I'm tired of racist assholes too
Jamastiene
(38,187 posts)Most sites have a policy about that kind of hate. I'm sorry you had to put up with that.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)I sent the message you can see above to the admins. I seriously doubt they will do much about it. To them, its nothing they can fix. I tend to believe the owners are racist as well, as the amount of music offered in the Asian section is less than a thimbleful.
Marrah_G
(28,581 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Some may fear someone or something they don't understand. This has been around for years in our country.. fortunately people have begun to grow up and except that its ...not the color of your skin but the content of your character.
pampango
(24,692 posts)of one Asian country or another. I suppose not since "you all look alike" in the eyes of a racist.
If you're an Asian-American, racists will see you as part of the "problem" of minorities gaining my economic and political power in the US as cultural diversity increases. And if you were a national of an Asian country, a racist would view you as a threat to "us" as Asia grows more powerful economically and politically.
Either way, I suppose, a racist would view you as a 'threat' and someone whom they cannot be 'friends' with. It is sad.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)Mayor, Ed Lee is Chinese American. We have many Asian members in State and Local positions. Of course, its probably those same haters, who hate our city for the amount of Gay, Lesbian and Transgender that live in our fair city. The rainbow flag is seen often in San Francisco especially around the Castro district and Fulton Street. Maybe that's why our city attracts all these street preachers who scream at passers by (Mostly tourists) about how our city will be the first to burn in their hell.
A racist would hate to live in our city, because we have many people from all over the world there. Even during the recent World Series, there was talk from Kansas City about the Giants would never win because of the "Faggots" on the team. The same was said of the 49ers years ago when Joe Montana took the 49ers to the Superbowl.
Haters gotta hate..
Odin2005
(53,521 posts)It's super-progressive and it's climate is basically perfect!
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)The fog can be hell sometimes at night...it seeps into your skin and chills you to the bone even if you are under four layers of blanets.
Odin2005
(53,521 posts)yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)in that weather, than you would now what I mean.
Odin2005
(53,521 posts)lonestarnot
(77,097 posts)panader0
(25,816 posts)I kind of doubt it, there are many Asians in Los Angeles who love the dodgers. I have friends down south in LA who would take me to games (so long as I leave my Giants cap at home. )
steve2470
(37,457 posts)Hopefully one day she will be relieved of her racism, and the world will be a bit better.
Albertoo
(2,016 posts)She's my wife.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)There was a movie I saw once from Japan, where the female characters name was "buta" which means pig. That kind of name around here, would be an insult. There, pigs can be cute too.
Albertoo
(2,016 posts)It can even be a backhanded compliment if they call you a Zu Bajie
Avalux
(35,015 posts)I'm sorry you had to encounter such an ignoramus.
icymist
(15,888 posts)Please don't waste your time with people like this. Just say to yourself, "This person is nothing but a memory and the memory is fading".
I guess we have a long way to go in a country that calls itself 'melting-pot'.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)generational thing. Kids pick up what their parents think, and believe it, cause why would their parents tell them different? Eventually the real world will teach them that what they were taught was wrong.
WhiteTara
(29,718 posts)for that racist being. That would have really hurt my feelings; but if it's any consolation, we can be friends. I've enjoyed your posts over the years and I love your perspective.
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)a way of adding friends on here. I don't think it will be available in the future either .. unfortunately. I am on Twitter if you have that.
WhiteTara
(29,718 posts)I guess I can only be your virtual etheric friend as I'm really not a social media person. again
yuiyoshida
(41,831 posts)media or a social person? Okay