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yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 08:39 PM Dec 2014

"But we can't be friends..." "Why not?" "Because you're Chinese,.. don't like Chinese People"

This written conversation happened to me two days ago, on line, in Chat. While logging on, I received a curious message that simply read: "?".

So I replied back, to this girl, "Hey there, Hi, whats up, saw your note, you have a question?"

Her: "Why did you add me back? I removed you from my friends list, why did you add me back?"

Me: "OH, idk, was there a problem? We seemed to hit it off the other day in the chat room? Whats up?"

Her: "I removed you for a reason".

Me: "Oh, I am sorry, what was your reason... I guess I didn't notice.. Did I say something wrong?"

Her: "Well, we Just can't be friends..."

Me: "Oh, I am sorry, why is that, exactly?"

Her: "Because you're Chinese, don't like Chinese people."

Me: "Well, um...first of all I am not Chinese, I am Japanese. Secondly, I guess You are right, I

would not want a Racist for a friend...Third, I guess you did the right thing, thanks for letting me know.. Saves us both a lot of time and trouble. Good Luck with that hate thing ... Hope it works out for you."

Blocked her and removed from my friends list.


Nothing like a bit of brutal honesty, yeah?

74 replies = new reply since forum marked as read
Highlight: NoneDon't highlight anything 5 newestHighlight 5 most recent replies
"But we can't be friends..." "Why not?" "Because you're Chinese,.. don't like Chinese People" (Original Post) yuiyoshida Dec 2014 OP
Wow. The ignorance is appalling. Sorry that happened. nt okaawhatever Dec 2014 #1
That is bizarre, usually racists are much more evasive. BillZBubb Dec 2014 #2
They don't need to be, anymore. They have AM Radio, the Senate, and the Police. villager Dec 2014 #9
Those people now feel free... Bigmack Dec 2014 #41
That's exactly it. There is no longer any constraint on their damaged, damaging Ids... villager Dec 2014 #42
With Republicans in the House and yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #47
there was no way were getting to "the future" w/o marching thru Mordor first... villager Dec 2014 #62
Exactly right... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #58
Life is short. Spend is with people who like you. DamnYankeeInHouston Dec 2014 #3
Wow. Disgusting. So sorry that happened. TDale313 Dec 2014 #4
I thought you were Chinese. So, you're Japanese. Well, same thing to me. BlueJazz Dec 2014 #5
I tried explaining that once to this guy... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #6
I can tell PasadenaTrudy Dec 2014 #7
I had a Chinese employer who was very prejudiced against Japanese people. alphafemale Dec 2014 #36
thats awesome .. yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #44
Ah... from Hawaii you say... Chellee Dec 2014 #70
maybe not so secretly yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #72
Good Lord. So sorry that happened to you. villager Dec 2014 #8
We seemed to get a long really well until yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #10
I suppose the mind of a racist is a strange thing, indeed villager Dec 2014 #11
She wanted to let you know Scootaloo Dec 2014 #55
Its certainly a generational thing... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #57
I can't even get past how ridiculous "I removed you from my friends list" sounds Skittles Dec 2014 #12
That came after She checked my profile pic I guess... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #19
don't bother yourself with people like that Skittles Dec 2014 #32
Of course Jamaal510 Dec 2014 #13
I have heard worse insults on line Jamaal yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #51
There's only one thing you can say! Generic Other Dec 2014 #14
doubt she even watches Anime.... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #20
Aw, that's weak sauce. Gotta go old school... JHB Dec 2014 #74
Someone posted 10 hours of this song on Youtube! Generic Other Dec 2014 #75
That is horrible. WhiteAndNerdy Dec 2014 #15
That's what I was thinking. alphafemale Dec 2014 #35
That is unfortunate BlindTiresias Dec 2014 #16
I guess it took me by surprise... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #21
oh btw BlindTiresias Dec 2014 #24
I love Boba Milk tea... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #29
Why does this remind me of a "King of the Hill" episode? U4ikLefty Dec 2014 #17
If I remember that epsiode, he was yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #18
Laotian jberryhill Dec 2014 #34
oh yes! yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #43
I guess that includes more than just "Chinese People".. the hateful racist ignorance makes Cha Dec 2014 #22
I have been called racist names before... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #23
Let's HOPE so! Cha Dec 2014 #25
What a piece of shit! Odin2005 Dec 2014 #26
Its probably not her fault... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #54
I find it insane that there is still bigotry towards Asians. Odin2005 Dec 2014 #61
Well, you can't please everyone, can you? NBachers Dec 2014 #27
You don't need to know people like that anyway. Major Hogwash Dec 2014 #28
You done good madokie Dec 2014 #30
You should report her too. Jamastiene Dec 2014 #31
Actually I did report her.. yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #59
I just do not understand people... Marrah_G Dec 2014 #33
Its how they were brought up... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #52
I wonder if a racist like her distinguishes between Americans who are ethnically Asian and nationals pampango Dec 2014 #37
In San Francisco our yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #60
God, I want to live in San Francisco so bad. Odin2005 Dec 2014 #64
it is, but depending on where you live... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #65
Can't be worse than a Fargo winter! Odin2005 Dec 2014 #68
no but if you were ever WET and went out side yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #69
It's like the bigots who think all Latinos are "illegals". Odin2005 Dec 2014 #63
Was this a person from Rosebud Missouri? lonestarnot Dec 2014 #38
Probably a Dogers fan anyway... panader0 Dec 2014 #39
LOL yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #45
so sorry that happened to you, and yes, who needs racists for friends ? steve2470 Dec 2014 #40
There's one Chinese I call 'lemon face' Albertoo Dec 2014 #46
Asian Nicknames can be wierd... yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #49
Zu Bajie Albertoo Dec 2014 #50
Your response was perfect. Avalux Dec 2014 #48
I'm sorry that there are horrible people like this. icymist Dec 2014 #53
As I was saying up thread this is a yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #56
How horrible! I am so sorry WhiteTara Dec 2014 #66
Its too bad that DU doesn't have yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #67
Sorry Yuiyshida WhiteTara Dec 2014 #71
not a yuiyoshida Dec 2014 #73
 

Bigmack

(8,020 posts)
41. Those people now feel free...
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 12:09 PM
Dec 2014

... to say shit in public that they used to say quietly to their drinking buddies.

Anything goes, apparently.

 

villager

(26,001 posts)
42. That's exactly it. There is no longer any constraint on their damaged, damaging Ids...
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 03:12 PM
Dec 2014

...and the end result of those in power imagining they can do whatever they want, to whoever they want, is not going to be pretty. At all.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
47. With Republicans in the House and
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 11:52 PM
Dec 2014

the Senate next year, it might end up being a few years of hell for everyone.

 

villager

(26,001 posts)
62. there was no way were getting to "the future" w/o marching thru Mordor first...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 03:18 AM
Dec 2014

Some years of hell were inevitable. Alas.

Though it's already been too many years of hell, already.

 

BlueJazz

(25,348 posts)
5. I thought you were Chinese. So, you're Japanese. Well, same thing to me.
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 09:48 PM
Dec 2014

(A nice intelligent human. )

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
6. I tried explaining that once to this guy...
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 10:01 PM
Dec 2014

His response was "Ya'll look a like to me". It was then I realized you can't really ever educate these people. To him, I will always be some one other than White... and his smug superiority just showed me, how ignorant he really was.

 

alphafemale

(18,497 posts)
36. I had a Chinese employer who was very prejudiced against Japanese people.
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 07:52 AM
Dec 2014

This was over 20 years ago.

And I was baffled.

After talking to her I learned she had lived through some awful things before and during WWII.

But even as an older person with direct cause and experience to enforce her prejudice she actively worked against it.

When guests she identified as Japanese would come into the restaurant she would go into near panic mode in the kitchen then compose herself and introduce herself. Chat with them. Explain why her first instinct was to kick them out. But she was now welcoming them. She would discount a large part of their meal.

Therapeutic for her I suppose. Possibly most awkward restaurant experience ever for them.

But at least she knew her first instincts were wrong and she was trying to overcome it.

 

villager

(26,001 posts)
8. Good Lord. So sorry that happened to you.
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 10:11 PM
Dec 2014

Not sure how I'd handle it if something similar happened to me (I'm Jewish -- but with a "disguised" last name...)

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
10. We seemed to get a long really well until
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 10:17 PM
Dec 2014

She must have seen my profile with the photo. Whoops! Can't have this happening, click. Maybe I would not have noticed, except for her one symbol "?" message. How was I supposed to interpret that, other than she had a question? She would have been better off just blocking me in the first place.

 

villager

(26,001 posts)
11. I suppose the mind of a racist is a strange thing, indeed
Fri Dec 5, 2014, 10:30 PM
Dec 2014

You're right -- why send you a "?" at all.

Were they saying, "but can't you tell I'm a racist creep!?"

 

Scootaloo

(25,699 posts)
55. She wanted to let you know
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:41 AM
Dec 2014

Racists are rarely quiet. They get a sick joy over throwing hteir hate in people's faces. This dumbass was another example of that.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
57. Its certainly a generational thing...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:45 AM
Dec 2014

this kind of hatred passed down from one generation to the next, its the smart one who figures out the world is not like that.. and learns that their parents were wrong about this.

Skittles

(153,164 posts)
12. I can't even get past how ridiculous "I removed you from my friends list" sounds
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 12:40 AM
Dec 2014

to even being to address such a racist asshole

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
19. That came after She checked my profile pic I guess...
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 03:57 AM
Dec 2014

She was too ignorant to determine it from my name, I guess.

Skittles

(153,164 posts)
32. don't bother yourself with people like that
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 05:18 AM
Dec 2014

they are not worth ANY amount of time, none at ALL! KICK HER ASS TO THE CURB!!! YOU DID RIGHT!

Jamaal510

(10,893 posts)
13. Of course
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 12:51 AM
Dec 2014
Her: "Because you're Chinese, don't like Chinese people."


she would be brave like that while she's safe behind a keyboard. People can get mean on chat rooms and elsewhere online.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
51. I have heard worse insults on line Jamaal
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:19 AM
Dec 2014

I have a few African American friends on line, who have changed their profile pics to using White people's photos, or using a White Avatar with no photos attached to their profile. I ask them why, and they tell me hey don't want the hassle... its sad to surrender like that, why not be who you are? Why let the Racists win? I have encouraged them to do that, but they won't, its just easier to avoid the conflict than to be proud of who you really are.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
20. doubt she even watches Anime....
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 04:01 AM
Dec 2014

Her parents probably would have probably indoctrinated her well enough to keep her away from watching those foreign Cartoons!

JHB

(37,160 posts)
74. Aw, that's weak sauce. Gotta go old school...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:33 PM
Dec 2014

Say it, but with electric shocks and big cartoony mallets for emphasis!

Very cathartic!

WhiteAndNerdy

(365 posts)
15. That is horrible.
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 01:41 AM
Dec 2014

I'm sorry that happened to you. That person is apparently not too bright. Realizing that she liked you personally should have made her question her prejudice against "Chinese people," not make her reject you.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
21. I guess it took me by surprise...
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 04:02 AM
Dec 2014

Most of the people I hang with are fairly intelligent, don't know how she slipped into our group.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
18. If I remember that epsiode, he was
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 03:56 AM
Dec 2014

Vietnamese... Guess ol' Hank Hill never thought it out that far...

Cha

(297,275 posts)
22. I guess that includes more than just "Chinese People".. the hateful racist ignorance makes
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 04:09 AM
Dec 2014

cry, yuiyoshida.

Gotta feel a little bit sorry for such empty headed vapidity.. what vacant lives guided by hate of what they don't even know.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
23. I have been called racist names before...
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 04:17 AM
Dec 2014

She never referred to me as any of that, maybe there is hope for her yet, some day.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
54. Its probably not her fault...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:40 AM
Dec 2014

This stuff is passed down from generation to generation. Grand parents to parents to their kids, one day her kids, if she has some will wake up to the fact, that racial prejudice is just stupid, and should not be tolerated.

Odin2005

(53,521 posts)
61. I find it insane that there is still bigotry towards Asians.
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 02:17 AM
Dec 2014

I grew up in rural Minnesota and the only people I have ever known to hate Asians are WW2 vets.

Major Hogwash

(17,656 posts)
28. You don't need to know people like that anyway.
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 04:57 AM
Dec 2014

I have run in to some of the same type of people who exhibit that low level of ignorance.
And as far as I am concerned, it just isn't worth my time to educate them about how many of the really cool, really special experiences in life they are already discounting simply because it is "Chinese", or "Japanese", or whatever it happens to be.

Jamastiene

(38,187 posts)
31. You should report her too.
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 05:17 AM
Dec 2014

Most sites have a policy about that kind of hate. I'm sorry you had to put up with that.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
59. Actually I did report her..
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 01:13 AM
Dec 2014

I sent the message you can see above to the admins. I seriously doubt they will do much about it. To them, its nothing they can fix. I tend to believe the owners are racist as well, as the amount of music offered in the Asian section is less than a thimbleful.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
52. Its how they were brought up...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:24 AM
Dec 2014

Some may fear someone or something they don't understand. This has been around for years in our country.. fortunately people have begun to grow up and except that its ...not the color of your skin but the content of your character.

pampango

(24,692 posts)
37. I wonder if a racist like her distinguishes between Americans who are ethnically Asian and nationals
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 08:34 AM
Dec 2014

of one Asian country or another. I suppose not since "you all look alike" in the eyes of a racist.

If you're an Asian-American, racists will see you as part of the "problem" of minorities gaining my economic and political power in the US as cultural diversity increases. And if you were a national of an Asian country, a racist would view you as a threat to "us" as Asia grows more powerful economically and politically.

Either way, I suppose, a racist would view you as a 'threat' and someone whom they cannot be 'friends' with. It is sad.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
60. In San Francisco our
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 01:23 AM
Dec 2014

Mayor, Ed Lee is Chinese American. We have many Asian members in State and Local positions. Of course, its probably those same haters, who hate our city for the amount of Gay, Lesbian and Transgender that live in our fair city. The rainbow flag is seen often in San Francisco especially around the Castro district and Fulton Street. Maybe that's why our city attracts all these street preachers who scream at passers by (Mostly tourists) about how our city will be the first to burn in their hell.

A racist would hate to live in our city, because we have many people from all over the world there. Even during the recent World Series, there was talk from Kansas City about the Giants would never win because of the "Faggots" on the team. The same was said of the 49ers years ago when Joe Montana took the 49ers to the Superbowl.

Haters gotta hate..

Odin2005

(53,521 posts)
64. God, I want to live in San Francisco so bad.
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 04:23 AM
Dec 2014

It's super-progressive and it's climate is basically perfect!

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
65. it is, but depending on where you live...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 09:47 AM
Dec 2014

The fog can be hell sometimes at night...it seeps into your skin and chills you to the bone even if you are under four layers of blanets.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
45. LOL
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 11:36 PM
Dec 2014

I kind of doubt it, there are many Asians in Los Angeles who love the dodgers. I have friends down south in LA who would take me to games (so long as I leave my Giants cap at home. )

steve2470

(37,457 posts)
40. so sorry that happened to you, and yes, who needs racists for friends ?
Sat Dec 6, 2014, 10:51 AM
Dec 2014

Hopefully one day she will be relieved of her racism, and the world will be a bit better.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
49. Asian Nicknames can be wierd...
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:06 AM
Dec 2014

There was a movie I saw once from Japan, where the female characters name was "buta" which means pig. That kind of name around here, would be an insult. There, pigs can be cute too.

 

Albertoo

(2,016 posts)
50. Zu Bajie
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:09 AM
Dec 2014
Asian Nicknames can be wierd... There, pigs can be cute too.


It can even be a backhanded compliment if they call you a Zu Bajie

icymist

(15,888 posts)
53. I'm sorry that there are horrible people like this.
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:35 AM
Dec 2014

Please don't waste your time with people like this. Just say to yourself, "This person is nothing but a memory and the memory is fading".
I guess we have a long way to go in a country that calls itself 'melting-pot'.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
56. As I was saying up thread this is a
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:42 AM
Dec 2014

generational thing. Kids pick up what their parents think, and believe it, cause why would their parents tell them different? Eventually the real world will teach them that what they were taught was wrong.

WhiteTara

(29,718 posts)
66. How horrible! I am so sorry
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 10:06 AM
Dec 2014

for that racist being. That would have really hurt my feelings; but if it's any consolation, we can be friends. I've enjoyed your posts over the years and I love your perspective.

yuiyoshida

(41,831 posts)
67. Its too bad that DU doesn't have
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 11:19 AM
Dec 2014

a way of adding friends on here. I don't think it will be available in the future either .. unfortunately. I am on Twitter if you have that.

WhiteTara

(29,718 posts)
71. Sorry Yuiyshida
Sun Dec 7, 2014, 12:15 PM
Dec 2014

I guess I can only be your virtual etheric friend as I'm really not a social media person. again

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