One of my best friends killed himself tonight.

[neverforget]

He was 43. I'm in shock and very sad. RIP in Will. I miss you my friend!!!!!!!

[fizzgig]

1. i am so very sorry

peace to will and all those who loved him.

[Tikki]

2. So very, very sorry and peace to family and friends..

I, also, lost a male friend at the same age. He, also, took his life.


Tikki

[sabrina 1]

3. I'm so sorry.

[Behind the Aegis]

4. I am very sorry to hear this.

Take care of yourself.

Coping with the loss of a loved one from suicide is part of the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention.

Surviving a Suicide Loss: A Resource and Healing Guide can be found on that page and is a free PDF.

Deepest sympathies to you and yours and Will's loved ones.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

5. I'm so sorry to hear your sad news...

I know you will miss him...

You might be thinking that, since you were close, you should have seen this coming. Don't do that to yourself! Don't blame yourself.

He must have been in terrible pain to think that this was his only option.

Be good to yourself...

May he now rest in peace...

[LiberalAndProud]

6. (((((neverforget)))))

[Smarmie Doofus]

7. Jeeeeezuz. That's horrible.

Any idea what happened?

My condolences.

[mnhtnbb]

8. I am so very sorry for your loss.

[villager]

9. So sorry to hear this, neverforget

Had a friend do this three summers back (though at first it kind of looked like an "accident&quot

I hope and your friend's other loved ones can comfort each other as you grieve the loss...

[Ken Burch]

10. Dear God(or Dear Lack-of-God, whichever you find more appropriate), how horrifying for all concerned

"I'm sorry" can't possibly help at a time like this, but the English language is rather impoverished on this subject.
The most important thing for you to understand at a time like this is that, much as you will try to think back on what your friend was like the last times you saw him, you could NOT have prevented this. It's not likely that anyone could have.

Take the time you need to process this, and be with those who loved and missed your friend. You will all need each other in the days and weeks to come.

Know that people are thinking of all of you tonight.

[Hoyt]

11. Very sorry for everyone involved.

[Half-Century Man]

12. I am saddened to hear that.

[lovemydog]

13. Oh, I'm sorry neverforget.

Take care of yourself. Honor your friend. I've been there. It sucks. I believe my friends who have passed are in a better place than this often brutal world.

[catbyte]

14. Oh, I'm so very sorry, neverforget. Words fail me.

[ConservativeDemocrat]

15. I am sorry for your loss.

- C.D. Proud Member of the Reality Based Community

[Manifestor_of_Light]

16. I'm so sorry, neverforget.

[MADem]

17. It's terrible, isn't it?

Particularly when it comes as a total shock to friends and family. People will beat themselves up, worrying that they missed some "sign" or clue that might have alerted them to the distress of the individual.

I hope you have a chance to talk this out with someone, to try and help you get over the distress of the sad event.

[moriah]

43. I was one of the lucky ones -- they told me their plans first. That RARELY happens.

His other best friend and I recorded him and took that and the IM conversations to the local mental health court when he refused to go to the hospital with us and showed us the receipt for the gun - was waiting for the background check to get approved.

The sheriff got him in custody literally two hours before the background check cleared. The pawn shop guy was horrified, had no idea that he had nearly sold a gun to a suicidal man.

I felt like someone should have handed me 30 pieces of silver when I was done testifying at the hearing for involuntary commitment, but my friend is still here.

[MADem]

49. They hate you at the time, but they love ya later....

I have a relation who saved a guy who jumped off a bridge. The guy was screaming "Let me die, let me die" as my relative and a friend hauled his broken-bone-ass-body to shore. His mother was enormously grateful, the guy -- initially--less so. He went to the hospital, all the broken bones healed, and he went to an inpatient program for awhile. He's still here--I think he's a grandfather now. That was thirty or forty years ago, too! And he never forgets to thank my relative when he sees him.

So you're no Judas--more like a saint!!

[Unknown Beatle]

18. I'm so sorry for your loss.

[Blue_In_AK]

19. I'm so sorry.

[undeterred]

20. I am so sorry for your loss.

((((( neverforget )))))

[bettyellen]

21. So very sorry.

[BlancheSplanchnik]

22. :(

[ChisolmTrailDem]

23. So, so sorry neverforget. :( Peace to you and his friends and family. nt

[bluesbassman]

24. So sorry...

May he rest in peace, and may you be comforted with the fond memories of the time spent with your friend.

[freshwest]

25. (((HUGS)))

Suicide has a lasting effect on family and friends. Best wishes to you and all.

[shenmue]

26. ...

[bvf]

27. Sorry.

[barbtries]

28. so sorry for your loss never forget

so very sorry

[tblue]

29. Oh my gosh! So sorry, sweetie.

Reach out to someone you can talk to & talk about it. Get it all out. I wish I could fix it. I really do.

[JDPriestly]

30. I am very sorry.

[Change has come]

31. Sympathies to you and your friend.

[lonestarnot]

32. I'm sorry neverforget.

[Gelliebeans]

33. I'm so sorry

My condolences to you and his family and friends

[calimary]

34. Aw damn. I'm so sorry to hear this, neverforget.

I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. We all just went through a tiny taste of this a few weeks ago with Robin Williams.

It's such a sad thing. One always wonders what if...

A good friend of ours went out the same way several years ago - and it just crushed my son. He really looked up to her and she was a mentor to him. It was a shock and a horror and a numbing. Came out of the blue. NEVER would have expected it, just anyway, but especially not from her. You just walk around numb and confused and bewildered. You're run over by the big "WHY" question - that's never answered. Sometimes it feels like you're suffocating.

Words are so - well, incomplete? Insufficient? Hard to figure out what to say (and how) at a time like this. I guess I'd just want you to know you don't mourn alone. As I found out myself the night my mother died, there are MANY strong shoulders here within DU for you to lean against.




On edit - I went back and read through the thread, and California Peggy and Ken Burch really have some sensible things to add. You must NOT take in that "wondering what if" too deeply. Try not to pile that "what if I could have done something..." onto yourself (even though I know it's easy to do!). But it's crazy-making, and you don't deserve that. Fate's dealt you a rough blow. Seems to me being gentle to yourself is the best way to respond.

[roguevalley]

35. Nothing will help you but time. I am so very sorry.

What a lonely act. Take care and know you are loved.

[ashling]

36. I am very sorry for your loss

[area51]

37. I'm so sorry.

[defacto7]

38. There never are any words to say...

but, you know....

[ErikJ]

39. That's rough. My close friend's ex

shot his girlfriend then himself last week. I told her its lucky he didnt shoot her kid too as often happens when guns are handy.

[democrank]

40. So sorry for your loss.

[Granny M]

41. So sorry, Neverforget.

What a terrible loss. Peace to his friends and family.

[moriah]

42. You and yours are in my thoughts.

If you need grief counseling, please check out http://www.survivorsofsuicide.com/ and see if there are any meetings in your area.

You are not alone.

[etherealtruth]

44. I am so sorry .... this is truly horrible

[magical thyme]

45. I am so very sorry for your loss...

[a kennedy]

46. So sad and sorry for you.

may he RIP

[Triana]

47. I'm so sorry!

[Rockyj]

50. Very sorry...

[SummerSnow]

51. So sorry to hear of your loss..

my condolences to you and his family (((hugs)))

[BlueJazz]

52. My heart is with you. I understand. I won't go into it but I really do understand.

[LongTomH]

53. I'm so sorry to hear of your loss! I lost a friend to sucide years ago.

My own feeling at the time were conflicted: Sorrow of course, and guilt that I didn't know what was happening with him at the time. All this was mixed with a "How could you do this to me and your other friends!" anger.

I hope you'll be able to deal with your own feelings. Find someone to talk to, if need be!

[williesgirl]

54. My heart goes out to you. May he rest in peace.

[rustydog]

55. My thoughts go out to you

Hang in there, it is tough but you will get through this.

You can miss him deeply and still love him completely.

[mountain grammy]

56. I'm so sorry for your loss. You almost never see it coming..

I never did.

[neverforget]

57. THANK YOU to all. I really appreciate the kind words

and support.