Conservatives Cranking Terror Alert Level Up To OMG! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!

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http://wonkette.com/558046/conservatives-cranking-terror-alert-level-up-to-omg-were-all-going-to-die

Conservatives Cranking Terror Alert Level Up To OMG! WE’RE ALL GOING TO DIE!!!
by Gary Legum
Aug 23 10:00 am 2014


Great scimitar of Allah!

Wonketteers, we do not wish to alarm you about the threat from ISIS, but you should be SHITTING YOUR PANTS IN TERROR BECAUSE THEY ARE COMING FOR YOU AND EVERYTHING YOU HAVE EVERY LOVED. Or at least that seems to be the conservative talking point for the week after the tragic beheading of photojournalist James Foley by militants in Syria. Which is not to play down the insanity of ISIS at all; it is a vicious bunch of assholes. (Even Peggy Noonan was appropriately clear-eyed about the group in today’s column – pants-shitting terror has a way of sobering up even the most wasted of drunks.) But still, some of this might be a bit excessive.

Take Indicted Gov. Rick Perry, for example. Sure, Rick needs to distract everyone from the bad week he has had of being the first Texas governor indicted in a century. Since only a liberal squish would let a felony indictment derail his presidential hopes, Perry went to the Heritage Foundation on Thursday to speak words out of the hole in his face what is made for doing such. The topic was the crisis along our southern border, and the alleged felon currently occupying the Texas governor’s mansion, asked whether he believed that ISIS could take advantage of the situation to sneak operatives into the country, said:

There is a very obvious and great concern that because of the condition of the border from the standpoint of it not being secure and us not knowing who is penetrating across that individuals from ISIS or other terrorist states could be, and I think there is a very real possibility they have already used that.

Not that there is any evidence to support this conclusion, save that Muslim prayer rug someone found a few weeks ago, but it would be irresponsible not to speculate. The governor was joined in his speculation by one Joshua Katz, a former aide to head of the House Homeland Security Committee, Rep. Michael McCaul. Speaking to the Mensa board of directors who host Fox & Friends, Katz said that it is “very, very true” that ISIS could have already crossed the southern border. Which is pretty weaselly phrasing! Yr Wonkette could say that it is very, very true that we could have put on pants today, but that does not mean that we actually did. No, we will not provide photographic evidence.

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http://wonkette.com/558046/conservatives-cranking-terror-alert-level-up-to-omg-were-all-going-to-die