The act of kindness that can get someone fired.

[Baitball Blogger]

For the longest time I resisted purchasing items with cash, and instead favored credit cards. With the cards it was easier to get a reckoning day at the end of each month to see the things that I bought on a whim that I really had no need for. But there was one downfall in that system. I never had cash dollars available for tips or donations, so this summer I made sure I had about five or ten dollars worth of change with me at all times, just in case.

There were a lot of college bound students in the restaurant business working over the summer so I made sure that I tipped them every time I picked up drive-through food and drinks. At the hardware store I also had need of assistance to load the car with heavy purchases, and here I discovered a glitch. Some hardware stores don't accept tips. Others do. Frankly, I felt better tipping than not tipping, especially on very hot days. But there was this one specialty place where I came across a situation. I have been there several times before and never had a problem tipping those who helped me. So, when I saw an old man working on the same aisle that I needed assistance, I told him that if he helped me load up the car that I would tip. He replied that they don't accept tips. I thought, surely he was wrong, because I had been there a week before and had tipped an assistant right infront of his supervisor without any problem.

When this older man was done loading the car I didn't even think about it. I handed him a few dollars and he took it, but he took it with a look of horror on his face. He wasn't looking at me. He was looking over my shoulder. His eyes were wide, looking to see if anyone had seen us. I glanced back when I got in the car and didn't see anyone in the area.

I drove off feeling like I had committed a crime and got someone fired! Was this impulse of charity the wrong one? I wouldn't have done it if not for the previous experiences tipping people without any problems. What is the reason for these no tipping rules, anyway?

[unblock]

1. tipping can make other customers feel obligated, effectively driving the cost up.

other customers might not like this because they might then feel obligated to tip.

the employer particularly doesn't like this because the employer gets the reduced demand from higher effective prices without getting any of the extra revenue.

workers can also based the quality of their customer service based on tip, which has negative implications (nah, i'm busy, unless you got a note from mr. lincoln, wink, wink....)

[Baitball Blogger]

2. Not any customers around.

This was a builder's material yard. Not many customers around to see what we were doing.

[unblock]

3. that you can "get away with it" doesn't change the perceived need for the rule.

[Baitball Blogger]

5. I get it.

Which is why I titled the header, "The act of kindness that can get someone fired."

[Nuclear Unicorn]

12. Tips are also reportable income.

If tipping becomes commonplace the business has to restructure how it tracks, reports and collects withholdings. Businesses will err on the side of caution which means employees not making X amount in tips will effectively lose income.

[TeeYiYi]

4. Here's a thought...

Your story made me uncomfortable just reading it, and I wasn't even there. If the level of awkwardness was anywhere close to what I was feeling while just reading it, you probably shouldn't have done it.

Your situation started inside the store when you offered money. I feel sorry for the old guy who had to endure a now awkward relationship with you all the way to the parking lot. Whether his job was truly in danger or not is beside the point if the old guy believed that it was.

Making the old man uncomfortable and putting his job in danger was hardly worth the satisfaction you received by sneaking him a few dollars.

I would suggest that you take a better gauge of the situation before offering to tip in the future.

TYY

Edited to add: Your situation changed the moment you offered money inside the store. At that point, it was no longer about charity but payment for services rendered. Not the same as just slipping a few bucks to someone in the parking lot after helping you with your groceries.

[Baitball Blogger]

6. It wasn't a store, per se.

It was an outdoor yard where the supplies were on display. The old man was already helping me. I had already told the supervisor that I would need help loading and he had put in a call and I assumed the old man was the one who responded to that call, because I was the only customer in the place.

But, yeah, I'll take the criticism. I just couldn't understand how the rules could have changed in one week when I had done the same thing openly in front of the supervisor a week before.

[Fla Dem]

7. My feeling is you do what feels comfortable for you to do.

If there is a sign in a store saying "We do not accept tips" I would never put an employee in the difficult position of having to refuse a tip. I would also never advertise to any employee that if they help me I would tip them. Employees are there to service the customer. If I need help getting something to my car, and it's extra heavy or requires a lot of hard work, and it's a crazy hot day, and the employee was gracious and helpful, I will give the employee a couple of bucks. In the end I just do what feels right to me at the time.

[Baitball Blogger]

11. There was definitely no sign to tip me off.

I was going by previous experience. My desire to tell him that I would tip partly stemmed from the guilt that I should have been loading my car myself. But I've been doing some heavy lifting for several months now and I'm getting the signs that my back is about to go.

[Orrex]

8. If the employee says that they don't accept tips, then that's the end of it

Forcing a tip upon the employee, even with the best of intentions, puts the employee in an awkward position. I've worked at places that considered tips to be money inappropriately taken from customers, even if the customers gave it freely.

Offer to tip when you feel moved to do so. But if the employee declines, then don't press them about it.

[Baitball Blogger]

10. Good advice.

I will certainly heed it based on this experience.

[Orrex]

14. Mind you, I think that you were making a sincerely nice gesture

You were simply working in an environment that didn't encourage it!

[dilby]

9. When I was in college I worked the front desk for a hotel and we did not accept tips.

We were specifically forbidden by management to accept them. The reason being was everything we did for guests was part of our job description and we were paid higher than any other hotel in our area about $2 an hour more and this was in the 90's. I was always proud to tell a guest that I could not accept tips because I worked for a hotel that took care of their employees.

[Baitball Blogger]

13. I can understand the policy if the workers are getting over paid.

Really, it's not for me to question why an employer would establish the policy. It just would be helpful if there was a sign up to make it understood to the customers.